Search Results: screwed up relationship

I was talking to a girl a few years ago. She was really interested in me and wanted a relationship. I kind of pushed her away because of things I was dealing with. It definitely seemed like a rejection from her viewpoint. I always felt awful about rejecting her, so I apologized and told her what I was thinking. I said it was my fault and she didn't do anything wrong, and that she is great. I told her it was my anxiety and depression and I didn't handle it well and I didn't want to reject her. I owned up to everything, took full blame and shared what I never was comfortable sharing with anyone. Her response was to ignore my apology and then post a picture of her all Dolled up trying to look as good as possible. Her hair done, makeup, trying to look like an Instagram model. She doesn't always post pictures like this, so the timing felt intentional. My impression of it was like a, hey, I'm great this is what you're missing type of thing.

Noone owes anyone forgiveness, but I am put off by this response. I went from feeling sad I hurt her feelings to feeling grossed out by her character. I told her she was great, and it was my anxiety and depression, and she responded like I had rejected her. I don't know, no response at all would have been one thing. But to kind of rub it in someone's face with a "Screw you im the bomb" post after someone talks about dealing with depression. That seems kind of messed up to me.

Where do you stand? Noone owes forgiveness or her response was a red flag?

I have never gotten a second chance after a romantic screw up.

My screw ups were usually verbal. For example there was a girl I was having a fling with 2 years ago. She was cute af but her legs were a bit too briskly from not regularly shaving. I didn’t dare mention anything the first two times we hooked up. However before the third time I tried to tactfully ask her to smooth up a bit for our next hang out. She got pissed & that was the end of it. I tried apologizing a week later (despite her reaction being a bit over the top). She seemingly forgave me but we never met up again.

In my more serious and long term relationships I usually got axed for not communicating well enough over problems. Not saying women can be a unnecessary pain in ass at time. We all know that. But we have to hear them out whether we like it or not at times. However I had to learn a few hard lessons on that one. Still though I have never in my life had a girl follow up weeks or months later after she initially decided to cut it off saying she had second thoughts.

Anyway I personally believe women overall get more second chances than men for romantic screw ups. Especially in the western world. Even more especially if the man & woman are in “the same league”. Men are taught to endure more crap. Maybe sometimes it’s worth it to be patient but other times it’s pathetic (e. g. taking back a cheater). There are exceptions when women tolerate way more bs then they should if they are dating a guy way out of their league. Also some women sadly tolerate horrific abuse but stick around because they have some sort of sick twisted masochinistic pleasure from that bullshit (another topic). But overall they have less tolerance for screw ups as vice versa in my opinion

But in all the rom coms I (once in a blue moon) watched growing up there is a common storyline of the guy making a mistake but later getting a second chance and/or proving himself. But I rarely if ever see that happen in real life.