Search Results: make him realize what he has

These are both awful scenarios but before answering which is worse really take time to analyze because for me initially I chose one to be worse and I thought of it more and more I realized that for me the other situation was worse than the one I initially felt was the worse one so I’m curious what others conclude between these two awful situations

1st scenario

your partner cheated and when it all came to light he confessed and repented and explained it happened because I felt unloved and lonely (you’ve been rejecting your partner for years now depriving your partner of sex) not a reason to cheat, there never is but it is what lead to the present situation and wants to make it work and learn to communicate

the right thing to do there was to communicate and reach an agreement but humans make mistakes and that’s what happened and realized it only after the fact & trying to make things work to mend the broken relationship.

2nd scenario

you find out your partner has been sending videos of you both having sex where you’re full exposed and naked with people that you see regularly and the people watching it are other married people but their partner also doesn’t know that their partner is watching that stuff.
Doesn’t want the relationship to end and has apologized

Which of these is worse and which is less hurtful and which one is more likely to end in the relationship actually overcoming the awful situation?

She won’t butt out. At first I took it as “okay, she means well”, but now I don’t know. I took a long break from dating and was fine just being single, and she says “nope, you’re 40 now and you’ve been single too long. You need a man in your life. Since you’re friends with me you’re getting a man whether you want one or not” (she loves to matchmake). I realize she has a point, so I get on Facebook dating. She saw me on the apps one day at lunchtime (we work together) and she’s telling me who to swipe right on, who to swipe left on, etc and when I didn’t swipe right on a guy she told me too, she literally took my phone out of my hand and swiped on a whole bunch of guys because I (according to her) “clearly don’t know how to pick men”. Eventually I did match with a guy who I really liked, we’ve been dating for almost a year, and she doesn’t like him. Apparently she’s got someone all picked out who she wants to fix me up with (who’s a really nice guy and financially well off but I’m not attracted to him). The guy understands and said it’s fine but she won’t stop and says “this guy’s perfect for you, and your boyfriend’s a loser. Dump him and give this other guy a chance.” (The guy is definitely loaded and my boyfriend supports himself well, but he treats me well and we make each other happy).

she’s gotten to the point where she’s literally taken my phone out of my hand and texted my boyfriend from my phone making really ridiculous demands on him (like demanding he get me a Louis Vuitton bag for my birthday which I know he can’t afford). She’s caused some bad fights between us this way.

I’ve tried telling her to butt out but she doesn’t. She’s dating a guy who is 25 years older than us and is trying to push me to date much older as well. My boyfriend is early 40’s, like me. Nothing wrong with dating older men, but if I’m happy why can’t she just butt out?

So, recently talking to my bestie, she and I realized how both our boyfriends tend to lack empathy.

My boyfriend is so stubborn that he isn't wiling to yield on certain things, or, even consider that he could be in the wrong. It has resulted in fights between us, ending with him being confused. I ask him questions like "if you were in my shoes, and I said that to you, how would that make you feel?"... and he then will come to realization, and apologize, or at least meet me halfway.

Do you think its possible to make someone more empathetic?