Search Results: do people really change

Disclaimer: I DO NOT. I’m asking this bc i find it peculiar many people have this mind set & are bothered by someone providing pertinent data as if it is a decision. With so many playing games. I think honesty is refreshing.

Being upfront about personal relationship goals on the second date seems very early for some, for others it is just being efficient and not wasting time. Yea you can develop feelings for the person and perhaps give up stuff important to you, but I think many people don’t want to fall into that trap - which I understand.

I can see both approaches having merit. Being open free and seeing how things go not worrying about the future until you know how you feel is one technique tho probably best suited to 15-26 year olds or people for whom relationships are not a priority. Life keeps moving and while you’re seeing “how things go” with someone you may end up not wanting to be with bc turns out tho you fell in love, you want very different things— other people are meeting people they settle with who might’ve been a really good fit for you 🤷🏻‍♀️

Being upfront knowing what you want sure saves a lot of hassle - tho not everyone reacts well. & perhaps what you want changes. I think with major things like sex or marriage it’s crucial to be on the same page. I understand bringing it up as early as possible it is very unlikely to change. You may agree to compromise, but it may be to the point either or both are miserable.

If a guy doesn’t tell me what’s important to him up front, that’s fine as long as it doesn’t Interfere with my ability to make an informed decision. Likewise, If he tells me straight up on say date two or three, that’s fine too —unless his actions betray his words. Then he’s not being upfront he’s being shifty.

But to be upfront, I would not see that as needy or desperate & I CERTAINLY not as indicative of having made up his mind about ME. 😂

This is about me & guy I asked out a few weeks ago —and after some mix up we’re on track to hang out Thursday evening or Friday morning 😂

… So he knows I hang out in a tree at the library where he works in between my shifts, bc he ran into me there a while back. He has since made it a habit of stopping to say hi & sit with me on his way into the library to work.

I don’t think there is anything wrong & obviously he’s free to sit in any tree and I certainly never ashes not to. I think it is very sweet and courteous. I think if I was normal, I’d probably enjoy it. But well I go there between shifts to decompress and be alone and with him coming by it feels like I need to be “on” which is stressful.

And yeah I know when you get along it shouldn’t be stressful but sone prophetic get stressed & we only really just decided to maybe date so the dynamic has changed tho I’ve known him a few years.

first person I ever felt really strongly about I got so nervous I’d end up avoiding him and he thought I hated him and it was a big mess. And I don't know if I’m always going to feel weird around people I like or what. I was five till I ashes him out in text between the two of us he was the mire shy. I think tuat has flipped now & I’m very disoriented. he seems really confident and I’m all spazzing out inwardly. Outwardly luckily I’m composed. It’s my thing lol

Not sure exactly what I’m asking. Im just a bit concerned of my unfortunate tendency and I don’t know if this is “ new situation nerves” or I’m just beginning my truest journey of escapism even tho I like the person very much.

So I don't know, I guess any thoughts on the subject are welcome, thank you.

LOL I love how with these images, when the girl is nervous the girl is brunette. When the guy is nervous, the woman is blind 😂 🤦🏻‍♀️