Search Results: girlfriend or best friend

I recently broke up with my girlfriend Sandra because I had too many trust issues. I really love Sandra but I had to end it because I always thought was cheating. She seemed kinda flirtatious and inappropriate with her male friends.

Right after I dumped Sandra I went online and found a girl named Brenda. Me and Brenda were a good match. And I usually don’t do well with online dating. Only problem with Brenda is she lives in another city. I live in Seattle and she lives in Portland. So we talked online for 3 weeks until she finally drove up to Seattle to meet me. We had a great time together with the best sexual chemistry. I drove to Portland the week after. I agreed to have a long distance relationship with Brenda to keep her coming back. Brenda calls me her boyfriend. Now Brenda is talking marriage and wants me to move to Portland. I’ve told her I don’t wanna live in Portland but she’s trying to convince me. I do like Brenda and I want to keep her. But I can’t live in Portland.

As much as I like Brenda I know I’m eventually gonna have to let her go, but I’m not ready to let her go as of yet. On the other hand Sandra wants to get back together. I do love Sandra and want to be with her and try again. But I also love Brenda who I know is gonna be gone eventually. What should I do?

I feel like this is pretty obvious but the best examples of healthy relationships come from the couples I know where the women is willing to contribute the same if not more depending on the current situations.

2 samples...

1 - I have friend who bought a house with his partner almost 2 years ago, his girlfriend paid more for the downpayment and is paying more for the mortgage right now because she is further along in her career and is making more money consistently then he is. They worked out a deal where he will eventually pay more for the mortgage & contribute more when his career eventually takes off.

2 - I have a friend on the verge of getting married and he had to move in with his wife to be sooner than expected because his work & student visa got screwed up at the end of 2021, since then he has been living with his girlfriend and she has been taking care of him financially until he gets full citizenship & is able to work.

Based off of those and other examples, I've notice that the 50/50 & the give/take method of a relationship works the best.

What are your thoughts?