Search Results: women want this talk after a break up

Asked this woman out at my gym, she said no because she has a boyfriend. We stayed gym buddies since.

Then all of a sudden a couple months later she said she was breaking up with her boyfriend and wanted to take me up on my offer. After the breakup up though things took a turn. She admitted she has interest in me, likes me, but needs time. Since then things have been hit or miss. She doesn’t really text or respond (I barely text her now), no social media interactions on my stuff but does on other people’s.

Yet when I see her in person (usually at her work, she works at that gym) she’s happy to see me, could talk to me all day and does text fit a bit after I leave but then goes silent again. She says she’s getting me a Christmas present and wants to exchange on Christmas Eve after work.

I get she probably needs time, her ex cheated on her and from what I can tell was manipulative (she hasn’t really opened up about it to me). But I guess by mind is split. Part of me is saying her actions speak louder than words (not communicating, she does say she’s horrible at texting). The other part says she just broke up with her ex and is probably trying to work through that and keep me and the situation separate.

What are your opinions?

Over my life I’ve had to deal with all sorts horrible incidents with women. Being ghosted. Being (unannounced) friendzoned. Being stood up on dates. Being insulted over things I have little or no control over (physical features I was born with).

All of that sucked. However when I find myself in a role reversal situation I usually try to treat others how I wish I was treated.

For example when I broke up with last girlfriend I really didn’t want to see or talk to her. I knew she was going to go berserk and not take it well at all.

However my girlfriend before me completely ghosted me (after dating for 9 months). The girlfriend before that treated me like I was less then human we broke up (despite me maturely accepting her decision) and gave me virtually no closure. Some of the things she said to me back then still haunt me to this day

Anyway I planned to do neither to my last girlfriend. As excruciatingly uncomfortable/painful as it was I broke up with her face to face and the whole ordeal lasted over 2 hours. She screamed, yelled, cried, made a huge scene and culminated with her threatening to commit suicide. It got so bad her grandmother had to call the police to have her placed on psych evaluation. On one end I truly felt bad for her but another end she inadvertently gave me closure and helped me confirm I made the right decision. I look her up on social media form time to time and thankfully I know she’s still alive

So as horrible as that was at least I was able to walk away knowing I did the right thing. I gave her full respect and closure. Let her say everything she wanted to say. She can look back and know she got it all off her chest. I know that will help her move on faster.

However I have never once in my life had a woman give me that kind of respect. But still do people generally treat others worse when they are mistreated in romantic scenarios?