Why Do We Keep Ignoring Bullies?

Anonymous
Why Do We Keep Ignoring Bullies?

I'm sure when most of us were kids, we were taught the golden rule: treat others the way you want to be treated. We were also taught that when people do the wrong things, there are consequences and punishments, and yet so many people tell the tales of absolutely horrific bullying where there were no such consequences for their bullies even when reported. I'm not talking about a little teasing here and there, I'm talking to the point where people have had to move away, or police got involved, or to the point that it was so bad, the victim killed themselves. If we're to a point as a society where we think its okay to let that level of bullying continue to the point where young kids as young as elementary age, kill themselves, honestly what does that say about the people we have become?

Why Do We Keep Ignoring Bullies?

I'm not sure when the lessons in life about bullying became, if you get bullied, then just ignore it and hope it will go away, rather than, when you get bullied, report it, and that person will get dealt with appropriately. Why do we constantly reward the bully in our society and punish the victims who are already at a bullies mercy? Why do we expect young children who have not reached the maturity of adults to know how to handle someone harassing them online 24/7, or punching them every single day in the locker room, a bully threatening their life or their family if they tell anyone what the bullies are doing to them, or constantly day by day tearing down their victims mercilessly? Most adults wouldn't know how to handle that level of harassment or abuse...which is why we do advise if adults are in that situation to call the police so they can help handle it, yet we expect a 10 year old to just be fine with what is happening to them.

There are also two sides to the story. Bullies themselves are often acting out because of something going on in their own lives. No one just starts physically assaulting others if they are happy and content. Many bullies need something---more mental/physical stimulation, help dealing with home issues, mental help, more structure, etc. to help them manage what may be their own feelings of rage, anger, boredom, or whatever else is going on in their lives. Rather than having positive ways and safe spaces to deal with these issues, they often just channel it into others.

Why Do We Keep Ignoring Bullies?

I don't think we have the "luxury" to keep ignoring the issues and telling kids hurting physically and/or mentally from the abuse of their bullies or ignoring the bullies own issues, anymore. We're now at a place in time where victims often consider pulling a gun on themselves or others as a means to solve their problems. This is precisely why it should be your business as a parent or as an adult when someone comes to you with an issue with bullying because it might not be your problem today, but on down the road it very much may be and you could have had the opportunity to do something, but you chose to turn a blind eye.

We can't stop every bully every time doing everything, but if we have the opportunity to help a young person in need, to deal with a bully that may need their own help in their lives to turn things around, we need to make the effort to do so especially if you know what it's like to be bullied.

Why Do We Keep Ignoring Bullies?
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Loveherbut
    Its part of growing up honstly many famus successful people were bullied at school. I was a bully and i was bullied even more got beaten up got my money stolen even teachers bullied me even at college so what did that do to me well whenever someone bully me i have this urge to prove them wrong to get better.. And thats what i did i find myself more successful than my teachers and classmates that used to want to beat me and push me down... I remember when i had my first job i met a teacher who taught me in worst years where the whole school bullied me and my friends and she said wow u work here u look familiar did i teach u i said i never seen u before!
    Funny when u be something all the people would like to pretend that they gave a shit about u...
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Anonymous
    Well, a lot of "bullying" is normal childhood stuff or childhood teasing and people need to toughen up, they can't handle it how all the previous generations did. Get called 1 name and cry and call it bullying. Some are extreme and real bullying though, I do acknowledge that. Those ones should be seen as a criminal offence. If they went in the street and did these things to random people and police were called, they'd be arrested, so why should it be different just because it takes place in a school building or whatever.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Yeah, no, teasing here and there should be a thing kids experience because it teaches them how to deal with other conflict down the road, but I mean extreme bullying where the harassment is violent, 24/7, and criminal. I don't think a 10 or 13 year old should have to figure out how to handle that on their own because most adults in those situations would call the cops and the harassers would be dealt with.

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What Girls & Guys Said

26
  • FakeName123
    If you really want to help young people in need, then you need to make them realise that bullying happens for one reason alone. Social hierachy. If you get kids to go crying to their teacher and whatnot when being bullied, that kid is directly admitting to the bullies "I am too weak to handle things myself" - which will create a vicious cycle.

    Instead teach kids to be capable of handling themselves, standing their ground and self-defense.
    • Anonymous

      I'm not talking a little teasing here and there. That IS something I think kids need to experience on some level because it does teach them to handle conflict, but what I'm talking about is things like physical assault, someone threatening someones life or family, systematically harassing someone on a 24 hour loop via phone, email/social media, targeting someone's house or car. Now as the adult that you are, if someone did that to you, you'd probably call the cops if you're not one of those shoot them yourself people, but that level of bullying and harassment is not a normal part of growing up. At that level adults need to step in and deal with a child or children or teens or whomever and put a stop before someone gets hurt or hurts someone else.

    • You clearly do not understand my point. You are advocating for symptom fighting. I am advocating at understanding and fighting the cause of such situations.

    • Anonymous

      This isn't a war here. Kids aren't going to school to learn to fight one another. They are going for an education of their minds. There have been several incidences where a child, either the bullied or the bully has caused permanent damage to another child from fighting because all it takes is one hard swing or someone cracking their skull on the ground and that's it.. and you're the parent that taught them to fight, right? As the adults in the situation, we should not be looking at kids and saying to them violence the answer. That does not deal with the bullies at hand. It says to the victims of bullies, that we don't care, go fight, we approve of the bullying.

      I went to a high school with zero tolerance. In the entire 4 years I was there, there were zero fights on campus because the repercussions from the administrators were so harsh, and so strict that it wasn't worth it. Contrast that with my middle school which was permissive and fights occurred daily and admin turned a blind eye

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  • clampfan101
    One of the worst part of being bullied is not knowing why it's being done.
  • Mesonfielde
    They are ignored because it takes too much paperwork to do something about it.
    • The only paperwork I know of is the signup sheet for a self defence class.

  • Danfrombackhome
    Because kids aren't taught to stand up for themselves anymore. You know how I handled bullies? Slammed their face into a locker. They didn't bother me again
  • genericname85
    there´s just no way to beat that... it´s always gonna be a thing.
  • formation
    there is nothing wrong in bullying. what defines bullying anyhow? it's completely subjective
    • Nainobi

      That is the stupidest comment I've ever heard

    • Tomsta

      Tell that to the people that have commited suicide because of it...

    • What are you, some kind of belly rubber?

    • Show All
  • Anonymous
    You're right. I think a lot of the time, people just don't want to get involved. It's like when you see those videos of someone being harmed on the streets and everyone is just standing around watching or taking videos of it. They're weak as hell if you ask me and almost equally as bad as the people doing it.
  • Anonymous
    Bullies shouldn't be ignored, they should be sent to prison.
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