How many times, as a teenager, had/have you been pressurised into doing something that went against your morals? How many times did you feel you did not belong anywhere, just because the people around you did not see or do things the way you see or do them? It's completely natural to fall victim to peer pressure early on in one's life when you're trying to discover yourself. It sometimes carries on to adulthood. But like all other struggles or shortcomings, it should be acknowledged before being treated. During this myTake, I will be sharing some of my struggles with peer pressure, and how I overcame them. If you are going through such a phase, I would recommend reading through.
1. Smoking
This is by no means an attack on smokers. As someone who has chronic smokers in his family, I know the reasons why people start smoking in the first place. However, I've noticed many people develop the habit early, primarily in their teenage years. I spent two and a half years in a school where the town's worst lot came to study. I've studied with a rapist, a guy willing to pull the trigger on anyone who looks at him funny, and many more such personalities. One particular issue I always ran into was smoking. Everyone around me smoked when there was no one around to see. There were times when my friends threatened to drag me with them to do some "hookah", despite me refusing to. "Just a puff", they would say. Little did they know this was the same way many of my family members developed an addiction.
However, I always stood true to my word. I firmly told my friends it just wasn't my speed, and left whenever something of the like was brewing. Although I was called many things, and even isolated, I always told myself that I was doing the right thing for myself.
2. Shunned For What I Believe In
In this day and age, it is baffling how some opinions can incite such violence and hatred. This is mostly prevalent with religion. Being strictly Agnostic, I cannot tell you how many times I've been told that if I continue to "negate the word of God" I will be "put to sleep, forever", by friends and strangers alike. This is even more unsettling because I never voice my beliefs until asked to do so.
I continue to face opposition for my beliefs, but have garnered a speck of respect from some of my peers for holding steadfast to them. I feel that even if I may die because of my beliefs, or am completely isolated, I will go down knowing that I stood fast to what I believed in, and did not let the undeserved hate get the better of me.
3. Being "Masculine" Is Cool
There is a common misconception in the minds of many men nowadays that being "masculine", i.e. treating women with disrespect, shunning them in front of peers, and sometimes even boasting about the amount of women a man has dated, garners more respect than acting like a decent human being. I am ashamed to even have to write this point down, but I thought we left such ignorant thoughts back in high school. The reasons for this unwarranted hate, however, is another topic, and I might delve into the finer details in another myTake, but the lesson here is simple: women are human beings, just like us men. No one likes being disrespected or being treated as an object. For too long I've been considered a "pussy" for not talking harshly to women. Even to this day, I'm expected to act disrespectful to women to be considered a "man".
4. Not Having a Social Life/Being Introverted Is Weird
Yeah, no. I'm not even going to indulge deeply into how this is wrong. Everyone has their own forms of entertainment, and it's fine for me to not want to hang out with friends when I feel exhausted after human interaction. It is a preference of mine, just like how I like 2 teaspoons of sugar in my tea.
At the end of the day, I can't help you get out of the peer pressure you face every day. It is up to you to do it yourself. But I do want to let you know that it's very much possible, and that you have the ability to overcome it at any point. With the right amount of hard work and dilligence, you can achieve this feat. Don't let society dictate who you can or cannot be. Instead, work towards a more inclusive society. Work towards nurturing your own personality, and doing the things you yourself love. It's not them who has to deal with you for the rest of their lives, it's you who has to do that. Could you live with yourself knowing that you didn't pursue what made you happy, and instead worked towards making society happy? I sure couldn't!
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