"But... don't you hate men then?"
Men are not inherently evil or abusive, and saying they are delegitimizes the fact that abusive men make fully autonomous choices to treat women (and….everyone lmao) like shit.
However, men can and should be held to the bare fucking minimum standard of “don’t be a fucking trash human” & people who are attracted to men and/or are in relationships with men deserve and should expect to be treated well by their partners.
"Boys will be boys" is bullshit. Males should be held accountable for their actions.
Because pressure for women to be "beautiful"
From a young age, little girls are exposed to harsh beauty standards and told that if they don't match up to society's definition of pretty, they aren't worth as much. That's fucked up.
Also, makeup. Let females wear as much or as little makeup as they fucking want. It ain't "false advertising" because we're not products and we're not trying to sell ourselves to you. On the other hand, it’s so wild to me that grown-ass women – women with car payments and mortgages and tax records and shit – are so severely told that their bare faces are so wrong that they think they have to apologize for subjecting people to what they actually look like. So, just wear the amount of makeup that you're most comfortable with.
Boys too. The answers to all the following questions is a resounding YES:
listen boys in lipstick, boys in makeup, its hot, its really really hot
Wearing eyeliner doesn’t make you “girly” or “gay” a lot of girls actually find it attractive. If you wanna put concealer on that pimple go ahead. It doesn’t make you less of a man. Makeup is not intrinsically feminine. Don’t let society’s screwed up gender roles stop you from expressing yourself.
Female childhood experiences:
- getting pushed around, shoved, bullied, hair pulled, called names, and things stolen by boys and being told to not react because “boys will be boys” and “that only means they like you” or “you’re only encouraging them to do more if you respond” and “they’re only trying to get a reaction” (happened to me constantly)
- being repeatedly scolded, called out, and punished for not acting enough lady-like, for getting dirty in the mud or getting your knee bloodied, boys of course don’t get punished for this because “it’s only expected of them” (i once had a teacher tell me that expressing myself "wasn't lady-like")
- being fitted into uncomfortable, limiting clothes that makes it hard to play
- having boys lift up your skirt and laugh at you to embarrass you (in first grade, two boys forced me to show them my panties, then laughed at me and called me weird for finally giving into that.)
- not realizing what is so embarrassing about it but feeling ashamed
- having to wait to go outside to play because first your hair has to be braided/styled and you have to look respectable at all times
- gangs of boys laughing at you for being a girl and thus somehow beneath them (YEP)
- getting shoved out of “boy’s clubs” and chased out for being a girl
- having “you’re a girl!” shouted at you as if it was an insult (it's like "uh, yeah?")
- demanding same respect and freedom boys have and getting told that you are somehow different and pushing you to focus on clothes and makeup instead
- getting your ideas, suggestions and voice yelled over by loud boys
- not getting a say in anything
- feeling self conscious about your body and very early trying to locate where you are on the spectrum of “sexy” to determine your social value (I was fucking NINE when I first tried to do this)
- figuring you were really low on the spectrum and either giving up on it or panicking and trying to increase your value somehow
- figuring boys will hate you unless you can get their attention with your looks but even if they like you for a bit, as soon as they get what they wanted from you they will turn against you and join other boys in humiliating you again
- hating boys
- feeling like you don’t have a voice and you don’t matter
- feeling like your interests don’t matter and being actively discouraged to developing any except for stereotypical feminine ones
- seeing only celebrated adult women are those which are high on the “sexy” spectrum and thrive on - - getting men’s attention but you don’t really want to do that and you feel like you have nothing to strive for
- realizing older men are staring at you in a weird way and not understanding why
- feeling like your parents are ashamed of you and not understanding why
- having thousand chores that are undervalued and not appreciated when you do them, it’s considered the least you can do as you’re a girl and need to apparently work to make up for it
- feeling that you’ll end up having to get married and helpless with the issue
- being told that you’ll “never get a husband” with your kind of behaviour whenever you act like yourself
-being repeatedly taught that being unwanted is the worst thing you can possibly be
All of this plus wishing you were a boy so you can be free, wishing you were a boy so people wouldn’t think you are a freak, wishing you were a boy so you are allowed to dream of being something more than pretty or a mommy, wishing you were a boy so you could have a girlfriend someday.
My most defining memory of being a girl is resenting the shit out of it. Girls are treated like crap. Not saying boys aren't, but girls are.
xx
~ Mrs Manson
Most Helpful Opinions