I've just watched this video and even though i was groomed at 19. I can really relate and connect the signs of grooming as this girl in the video too.
If you chose to watch the video she talks about how she'd broken up with a very toxic ex and then a older man started paying her attention and making her feel special like no one else did. He made her feel like she was different to other girls her age and that's why he liked her. He'd acted like he couldn't trust himself around her and as if he couldn't control his feelings when we all know when were a adult are selfs but teenagers are just a big no no and we know better. He'd constantly lie to her and make up stories. It may be legal after 16 in most places to date a adult but it still doesn't make it morally right.
I myself went through similar on this site when i was 19 and i recently rejoined mainly so i can prevent this from happening to other young girls. Basically id fallen in love for my first time with a boy around the same age. Eventually things turned ugly and i was in a bad place and my confidence was rock bottom.
I wrote about it on my old account and talked about how down i felt. Not long after i started getting messages from a older guy who used fake pictures of himself from Google and kept changing his age. He originally told me he was 26 and i found out he was actually 29 after he slipped up about his birth date .
He saw but i was at my most vulnerable and was still figuring myself out and took advantage of it by pretending to care. Hed tell me i was so mature for my age and if he was this boy who broke my heart he'd be treating me like a queen and that he was crazy and stupid for hurting me and that's what all young men were like with women.
Soon it turned to him trying to flirt with me and telling me i was beautiful and all that shit, teenage girls get all hot for. He'd tell me he really liked me and that he couldn't hold in his feelings anymore etc.
He started pushing me into things id mentioned time and time again but i felt uncomfortable with it and that i didn't want to do it but he'd make out like it was no big deal and it was what "normal people" did in long distance relationships. I also wasn't aloud to tell anyone about are relationships but he told me he kept bragging about me to friends. Whenever we'd fall out he'd make up some lie to make me feel guilty or sorry for him and he'd say i was being immature, selfish or acting like a kid.
Eventually i left him when he tried to get me into joining a cult. I kept saying no multiple times and that i felt uncomfortable with it and that's when i saw that he wasn't gonna give up and was using the same old manipulation tactics on me as he'd done other times. He also had some fucked up fetishisms to now i look back but would tell me it was "natural" for example the idea of getting me pregnant was a massive turn on for him.
Why we need to save the next generation.
I think this more important than ever for people to speak out about especially with how children and young people use social media as a everyday part of their lifes now. With past generations tech was still constantly changing and we were still learning. Now it's difficult to separate reality from what happens on social media apart for example tik tok is full of groomers and young teens sexulising themselves and desperate for others validation . For example Zoe Laverne, if you don't know about her id highly recommend you look into her. Yes the boy was 13 and she was 19 and all we know of is a kiss but because its on the Internet people will try and down play it especially because its a boy who wad groomed not a girl.
Its a lot more easier for predators to groom online and meet up with young people because it's easier to hide the version of themselves they don't want others seeing and manipulate younger people without others picking up on it. I can see this being more and more normalised on the Internet but you can't deny im some age gap relationships especially involving teenagers and adults there is a huge power and maturity levels.
Hollywood has also always been a big issue when it comes to normalising abusive relationships and huge age gaps too and i can see it moving more onto the Internet. Especially girls who romanticise relationships with older men online who see pictures from movies like Lolita and like the whole athletic if it and share pictures and quotes around without even watching the film or reading the book and make it out to cool and trendy to date a older guy and that it makes them so more mature than other girls there age.
I also think thanks to the movie Megan is missing trending currently and Alicia Kozak a kidnap surviver who was groomed online speaking out is really opening a new dialogue of the more extreme consequences of online grooming and its still happening now.
Id highly encourage others who feel comfortable to share their stories and if not just look out for younger people on this site when you see something that doesn't fit right with a older person on this site. I constantly seeing old men commenting on young girls posts and i had this myself when i was younger on here buttering them up at any chance they had.
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How can you be groomed at 19? That’s an adult and you make your own choices at that point.
I think you can be groomed at any age. Just like people get groomed into cults and terrorism and eventually he did try to push me into joining a cult
Grooming implies the inability to assess what you're being told though. I feel like as adults, it's just other adults trying to convince you of things. So it's more like just manipulative tactics, but grooming doesn't necessarily apply.
manipulative tactics is what he used to gain my trust and get what he wanted from me the same as someone would if they wanted to groom someone
I thought you were talking about hair and clothing when I saw your byline...
I can talk about more than one thing. Honestly try and raise awareness about the dangers of this site and just get took the piss out of. I give up
Sorry took what you wrote the wrong way.
Thought you were saying all im good for is talking about is hair and clothing.
Yeah, I get what you said in this article. It isn't just young people who are taken advantage of, of course; there are a lot of con artists out there, whether out for money or sex.
What race was the guy who groomed you?
White, why does it matter?
He was actually a American, wild life camera men, his name was Jason. He was originally from Texas i believe but moved down to Nevada for work and was constantly on the road.
He was white, very Conservative and was also mad on Christianity to the point were he joined a religious cult and tried to push me into joining the same cult that ran in my country.
Before you make the assumption but he was some Muslim man from Bradford who ran a kebab shop or something.
Just goes to show these types of people come in all different races not just the ones you don't like
I'm sorry if you ran into one of the 2% who are white, but that doesn't make the other 98% not Muslim, lol.
If it was a Muslim, you wouldn't have escaped, they would have thrown acid in your face. So you definitely got off lucky.
How many Muslims have you actually met or known? There's thousands of terrible white people and people of other races too who groom people not just Muslims and can you please give a link to were it says only "2% who are white, but that doesn't make the other 98% not Muslim" id like to know were them statistics came from as well as a actual story were a someone was groomed by Muslim and then got acid attacked other why she just making things up and you're a racist.
You only want to read the storys that fix your narrative. I could name you a tone of terrible white people who groomed people but i doubt you'd of heard of any of them because you only want to see Muslims as bad people not your own race.
Your the type of person who give Americans a bad reputation for coming off ignorant and uneducated especially towards the British because you only want to read the story's that fit your agenda of how British life is and don't want to hear anything that criticises your own people. You believe your race is superior to others and there for that makes you a racist and its not anything to be proud off. So you can either leave my comment section or ill block you because i don't associate myself with your types.
Also seeming as were just rushing to assumptions about people without actual facts i imagine your probably no different too how you think Muslim men think. Your probably one of these guys who thinks women are lesser and should be in the kitchen, serving their man and but their opinion doesn't matter.