The strange thing about American’s to perhaps some foreigners, is that we may come off as too in your face, to in your business, too loud, too…well, many things because generally speaking, in America, we are more outgoing personable people comparative to other countries. We frequently engage in small talk with strangers typically while say waiting in a long line for something, or perhaps at a sporting event, or noticing your cool band tee. We will talk to strangers about the weather, food, your annoyance level at having to wait, your cute baby, etc. It’s just how we are, and it’s not wrong, it just may be different to the way you culturally are and how you were raised to act around strangers.
Despite seeming like a friendly bunch, or to some, “too friendly,” the one thing where we draw the line is our bubble. If you don’t know, American’s have what is known as a personal bubble around them. It is a space, usually about an arms length away or 16-25in from the body, where we do not invite strangers in. This space should only be invaded by family, friends, lovers, and the occasional doctor. Otherwise, NOPE!
This makes interactions such as kissing on the cheeks, which the majority of Americans do not do, or hugs with strangers, or strangers sitting right next to you, or talking to you from within that bubble very Very VERY awkward and uncomfortable.
Two great examples of this are a room full of chairs and the step in test. If you walk into an American waiting room for example, a communal space, look around the room. Unless it is completely full, you will notice that there is at least one chair between each person or group of persons who do not know each other. No American would walk in and sit right next to a stranger unless there were no other seating options, and even then, so as to maintain one’s bubble, they may opt to sit on the floor or stand up just so they won’t have to sit next to someone else they don't know.
The second is the step in test. If you start a conversation with an American, stealthily step in a few inches while in conversation. Wait a minute and step in closer. You will notice that Americans will back up even when talking to other Americans, and they will keep backing up so as to maintain enough comfortable personal distance till eventually they get really annoyed and ask you to back up or ask WTF you think you're doing! They may even physically push you back.
Studies have shown that in terms of men vs women, women have less of a need for more space in relation to other women as opposed to men with other men. American men generally find it extremely uncomfortable, and may even perceive it an unwanted flirtation with them should a man enter into that bubble especially for kisses on the cheek or sitting say thigh to thigh with them.
In many other countries it is quite normal for men or women to sit very close to one another, hold hands, enthusiastically embrace someone they are meeting. American’s are like this with friends, family, and lovers, but strangers, absolutely not! We happily live in our American bubble, get out and stay out!
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