- 7.4K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
+1 ySome perspective. My sister was going to commit suicide around 17. She's 55 now.
A relatives daughter tried several times to commit suicide. In both cases, it was because of family turmoil... things they couldn't control that caused pain. Girls especially seem succeptible, but boys get hurt too. In the relatives daughters case... she tried several times when her dad was a mess (a drug addict) and that was really hard on mom. She survived, mom remarried a great guy and is happy, and daughter is really happy, has a boyfriend and is doing fantastic in college. She got past that junk and is contributing to life.
If she had killed herself... she would have trashed her mom... who knows what that would have done to her already wounded brothers and there is no way to recover her life. YES it is selfish.
That said, the pain is real, don't ignore it, the pain is a sign something is wrong. But typically, if there are some good people around you somewhere, that can be solved and you can live a full life. Get counseling, go to church, find good supportive people... get out of the place you are.
P. s. life changes every 10 years. The pain you have today will be a distant memory in 10 years. You'll have different problems when you are 60 and 70, etc.. There's always challenges. But I can say for sure...14-27 are the toughest years I've had.13 Reply- +1 y
"Girls especially seem succeptible, but boys get hurt too."
blogs.discovermagazine.com/.../suicide_AFSP.png
Males commit suicide at a far more alarming rate than females.
Other than that, I definitely agree with your sentiments. Life constantly changes, and feelings very often fluctuate. You may feel like fucking piss today, but tomorrow you may feel like a king, if not then at least you'll feel better. There are ways to deal with pain so kudos for sharing this. - +1 y
@legs_n_sheets Thanks for that fact. Maybe boys are just more quiet about it and don't act out and are more successful? I've seen and heard of multiple girls who want to commit suicide, but never from a boy. Maybe it is because boys don't have as good of a vocal outlet and keep things in. Thank you for clarifying!
- +1 y
Yup, double standards definitely have a weight on men's shoulders. There's no question about that.
Most Helpful Opinions
+1 yIt's selfish af, period. Not saying anyone fully understands others' miseries, or how they perceive them. But at the end of the day everyone without doubt has problems. Bottom line here is that you are taking your own life knowing the people who love you, specially your family, are going to suffer. There's no other worst act of selfishness that that, really. Same goes to people who live killing themselves slowly with alcoholism and drug addictions, etc,.. Those are all impulses born out of lack of empathy/consideration towards your love ones.
20 Reply
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yI think the main problem with suicide is that nobody hardly ever tries to identify or figure out why the person was driven to kill themselves. What compelled them to that degree to believe that there was absolutely NO hope, No peace, No happiness, NO difference or a way out in their circumstances, No healing, etc. Everything is NO.
Instead, we tell them to get help, which makes them feel like they are crazy or some psycho, or they're super sensitive, or we say that they choose to live in depression when sometimes it's really not that easy. We tell them if they kill themselves they will hurt others. Instead of finding motivation and encouragement to live, they're only living as an obligation for other people, as if it's some chore. We tell them it's about other people and never about them. We don't sit down and hear them out and lend and ear to let them rant about whatever is going on in life. Sometimes when people get it out they feel better.
You have a point, I think in a way it is selfish to just expect the person to continue on living in a misery just so other people can be comfortable. To me there's no point in life if you're just miserable all the time. What life is that? I'm advocating suicide, but I'm just trying to get you to look at it from that angle.
People don't really want to die; they just want the pain to stop.00 Reply
Anonymous(25-29)+1 yI think it's pretty selfish. First off, your life itself is a gift. I don't think a lot of people realize how amazing it is to be alive. Through some tiny miracle, you were the sperm who made it to the egg. Think about that. You were the sperm that won! And then you were born. And your parents/guardians spent years raising you, protecting you, and spending tons of time and money keeping you alive. If you kill yourself that means they wasted a large chunk of their lives on you. When people kill them selves, (with the exception of people with terminal illnesses) they're literally throwing away the greatest thing they will ever have, and figuratively spitting into the faces of the people who invested large portions of their lives on you. I get that life is hard, and sometimes it seems like things will only ever get worse, but sometimes things actually do get better out of the blue. Killing yourself solves nothing. All it does is remove you from the equation. You're literally just taking all the weight of the pain off of your shoulders and putting it all on the shoulders of everyone who has ever cared about you.
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+1 yin my opinion suicides of the young-adult-from-a-first-world-country ilk are pretty selfish. Even if bullies/your family made it so your life is shitty, suicide doesn't account for all the other people who might be affected.
What about your little kid sibling/cousin/niece/nephew/neighbor? How are their parents supposed to explain to them what in the world's happened to you? Is some of their innocence taken away by learning about the reality of suicide, or do they go on knowing a person they looked up to was taken away but not knowing why? What about your pets? Will they just be sad and confused at why you're gone, or will they think you abandoned them? What about that suicidal kid that goes to your school, or even just lives in your town? A good kid you'd never want to die? What if they hear about what happened to you and figure that if you did it, why shouldn't they? Do you want to be responsible for that? I wouldn't.00 Reply
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
16Opinion
5.2K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic. No, I don't think so. In fact, I hate when people say that.
A person who commits suicide is a person who is desperate, who is a very dark place. They're feeling so much pain, that life becomes a burden instead of a gift.
No one knows what they're going through. They might tell you they're ok, but they're not.
Sure, the people who love them will suffer, will miss them. But they are the only ones who know what they're feeling.
So it's not right to judge them.47 Reply- +1 y
agree with you , the best opinion here
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@ScottSummers I'm glad you agree with me. Thank you so much.
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it's all in the mind. No one can objectively say to other their lives are worse.
I mean, can a suicidal person objectively tell these guys his/her life is more miserable?
ichef.bbci.co.uk/images/ic/1920x1080/p03f6n7r.jpg
Or this child?
c8.alamy.com/.../...h-her-child-waiting-A1WGDB.jpg
What suicidal people do is piss me off because simply some people are born in very, very unfortunate circumstances. I mean, this guy was born with no limbs, and was able to be successful in life by using his unfortunate circumstances.
media2.s-nbcnews.com/.../...d-featured-desktop.jpg
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Suicide it's just a very selfish act, no matter if they kept their kept their contemplation silence, or did actually refused the help they were offered. The answers here are shocking to me, and I simply hope none of you ever have to deal with someone who is suicidal. They cause the worst emotional pain to their families.
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@legs_n_sheets I get your point. I'm not trying to say that these people in the pictures don't have a difficult life. They have.
What I mean that suicidal people, go through emotional pain. A pain they can't explain. A pain that sometimes other people don't understand.
And getting help isn't always the solution. And sometimes it's not a matter of wanting or not wanting to get help.
Plus, I don't think it's all in their minds. - +1 y
"And sometimes it's not a matter of wanting or not wanting to get help."
That's the problem right there, not all has a definitive solution, but sometimes things can be fixed within time. Some things are fixed immediately, and others require process.
Getting help should always be the solution. The point is to target the actual reasons for suicidal thoughts, specially if it's born out of a mental illness, and be able to get treatment once it's targeted. There's more than enough information out there to deal with different motivations for it.
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3130348/
- 4K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
+1 yNo, its not selfish at all,
How many of those people who have said yes have major depressive disorder, I'm betting zero20 Reply Yes it's selfish. Think of all the taxes you could pay and all the money you could help a firm make by serving as an ancillary piece of the corporate machine.
Be all you can be and snort whatever drug you can to get by. Just make sure Uncle Sam gets his cut.00 Reply
Anonymous(25-29)+1 yI meant to say no. It's not selfish. The selfish thing to do would be to murder the person that's causing you pain, so you can live free. Killing yourself and erasing your existence from the planet is not selfish. It is an act of choice that people can do. Most of the people that commit suicide didn't have very many people in their life to begin with, so there's no pain to "pass down."
10 ReplyI believe the devil plays with peoples mind, when it comes to with this. like the devil have said in the person ear - you are scum/filth/awful/worthless/and many more awful things. and repeat this over and over again for days to years. and the person starts to believe it and loose hope. , - and all it takes, is to kneel and smile at them and give them your hand and help them up. and show them the person they use to be. because in the end, the person who is kind and honest, is their rescue.
00 Reply- 1.3K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
+1 yI don't think so. Many times, we are driven to it simply because we've been selfless all our lives. You know what? I guess it's a little selfish. But we all have that in us, it's just our selfishness is an inconvenience to everyone else.
10 Reply Whoever wrote this episode for The Blacklist was on point.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPkDFO7WTW432 Reply- +1 y
^^It all goes down to that, really.
Good show, by the way.
- 2.5K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
+1 yNo more selfish than forcing someone to stay alive if they don't want to. Most actions performed by people are selfish on some level anyway.
30 Reply yes it is selfish because no matter how shitty your life is and no matter how many people hate you, there will always be at least one person that will be devastated if you commit suicide. and then getting over that is extremely difficult
10 Reply
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yNo, what's selfish is forcing someone to stay alive in pain and I hate people who feel they have an obligation to keep people alive against their will. My parents sent me to a mental hospital because they thought I was suicidal and I hate them for it to this day.
11 Reply
Opinion Owner+1 yI think parents of suicidal teens need to learn to let go
#SuicideIsARight
- 697 opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
+1 yYes and no. You are right, they pass on immense pain and loss to their loved ones, but at the same time you have to respect what they want from their life, including the right to end it.
00 Reply This isn't a yes or no question. There are too many variables. In general, I think it is a selfish, and cowardly, act. But certainly not always. So I can't answer yes or no.
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+1 yYou live in a place with internet. A place with technology. Meaning probably first world. People who commit suicide in a first world country honestly piss me off so much.
22 Reply- +1 y
Just because someone is from a first world country, doesn't mean that they don't have good reasons to feel like ending their life. They're susceptible to violence, abuse, and rape, like someone from a third world country, which is enough to ruin life for someone- I know from my own experience. I was sexualy abused for five year, have an alcoholic father, and has been homeless at once at age 14, because my father spent our rent money on gambling.
- +1 y
And what is your state of life, now?
Anonymous(30-35)+1 yNo it's not selfish. I totally agree with you. They're selfish if they tell you to keep living a life you don't want just so as not to hurt them.
The option to kill yourself is what makes life something you've chosen, instead of something forced on you that you can't get out of. That's why I believe suicide is the most important human right00 Reply
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yThere are different reasons for suicide, terminal illness, chronic depression disorders, and "I'm sad cuz nothin goes my way." There are arguments to made on both sides whether or not it's selfish, except maybe the last one. In any case, most suicides are cowardly before they are selfish. And yes, I've attempted before
00 Reply2.5K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic. Maybe but so is guilt tripping someone into living a miserable life just because you'd be sad if they were gone.
127 Reply- +1 y
This ^^^
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@BuchitaBuchys @Bandit74 I disagree. While I see the point, I doubt you'll say this to a suicidal parent, or son/daughter. Most times the feeling of being miserable is all in your head. Unless you're a starving child somewhere in Africa of course...
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@legs_n_sheets sorry but suicide isn't that easy
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@BuchitaBuchys All I can say to you is that sincerely hope neither ever face having a suicidal relative, or having to deal with someone who has major depression and drug/alcohol problems. You have no idea how much harm these people can do to their relatives, out of a selfish desire of not accepting and fully embracing the help they are giving them. And even with that said, many people who contemplate suicide aren't even vocal about it which only makes it worse for the families, because many times is simply very unexpected.
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@legs_n_sheets my dad was addicted to alcohol and cocaine growing up. He'd spend all of our money on that. It drove us into deep poverty.
My mom and sister were suicidal. I have been as well.
I know the struggles of all of that and I don't think suicide and drug abuse are the same - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys I'm very sprry to hear that. But the reason I'm interested in reading these responses is because a relative's father abused him, and mistreated him growing up ( and they also lived in precarious conditions), and yet he was able to grow into a very successful lawyer.
There are also some things going on in my family currently, and while I'm not getting into details, I'm just telling you the pain your father caused for his actions is the same pain that anyone would cause by suicide. What you're doing is justifying your family's suicidal thoughts because what your father did, and I've witnessed people moving forward despite very fucked up childhoods. - +1 y
sorry*
- +1 y
@legs_n_sheets rags to riches stories are really rare. To get your hopes up is silly considering statistically, the cycle of poverty is hard to break, regardless of hard work
- +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys True. With that said, while poverty has a strong link with criminality, is not the cause for murder, rape, drug commerce and other criminal acts. And so it's not the cause for suicide. Also, I'm not saying is common fr everyone to share a Ralph Lauren-type story, but people can have at least moderate success, and overcome poor conditions.
- +1 y
@legs_n_sheets I didn't say it was the cause for suicide.
And I know more people still in minimum wage jobs than college degrees even at age 50+ - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys Right, but at least they overcome poverty. I'm not debating we live in a fair system which we all know we're not.
I mean, there are people living in very poor conditions with elephantiasis and rare diseases like that. Some people just have it tough, yet some have an actual interest to overcome it, and others don't.
i1.mirror.co.uk/.../PAY-Teen-with-sagging-face.jpg
- +1 y
@legs_n_sheets Minimum wage with more than one person household is typically maintaining poverty.
And ah, the classic "someone has it worse than you" tactic. Right. i get it. This is why I also can't be happy, because someone has it better than me as well and their happiness is true, mine isn't. Or does it only work with sadness? I can't be sad because others have it worse? - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys I'm saying objectively no one can say they have it worse than others, actually.
Anyways, it seems we simply can't agree on this.
Just imagine going to bed to your partner, and then wake up and find him hanging cold dead on the fan. Some people live with that image, and sometimes far worse images.
Most people who start supporting suicide awareness campaigns do it after they live it firsthand. Just hope you never live something like that with any loved one of yours. - +1 y
@legs_n_sheets I have had to call the hospitals because of relatives overdosing, they didn't die, but it seemed like they wanted to.
I know that other people have it worse, but that isn't a good thing to say to someone whos depressed. its really insensitve really. Would you go to a person's wedding and say "you can't be happy because others have it better than you"? No, that is just weird and insensitve. - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys ""you can't be happy because others have it better than you"?
The logic I'd apply is "do you think you have it worse than this person, or does this person objectively have it worse than this other person?". I'm saying everyone has problems, no one can compare miseries and they shouldn't. The worse you can do is drown yourself in them, but try to overcome them and seek help. Suicide is not an answer.
Same way you can't compare other people's happiness. Some people are quite happy not having to be well known for example, some are more comfortable not getting any sort of attention. We know that's not the case for others, since some people crave attention like the highest level of success. So no, that's a straw man argument because that's not the logic I'm applying. - +1 y
@legs_n_sheets If the reverse isn't true, than why bring it up? When you bring up others who have it worse, it sounds like you're trying to make it an oppression olympics or something like that. It just sounds insensitive and it's really not as helpful as you think to tell people who are depressed.
"I didn't eat today, but oh gee, there are children dying of dysentery and malnutrition? I feel better already!" That's not how consolation works - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys Umm.. because you didn't understood my first point?
I would try to show a suicidal person to first gain perspective of other people, some people have it bad and they overcome their problems. Others he might even relate to. The point is, again, people can't compare their miseries to others, everyone has shit in their lives and suicide isn't the answer to the shit that goes on. There's enough knowledge and treatments to target different issues and solve it as best as possible. - +1 y
@legs_n_sheets again, it still sounds insensitive. I know you're trying to be helpful, but more often than not, it just sounds like you're trying to downplay what they're going through.
And I'm not pusing people to suicide, but I do think it should still be considered an option. Like last resort though. - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys Because to you, seeking immediate treatment and let others help you move on from contemplating suicide is "downplaying" it.
"but I do think it should still be considered an option. Like last resort though. "
Yes, I think absolutely all options and a heck lot of time has to be pretty much exhausted before anyone reaches to that point. At least we can leave it at that. - +1 y
@legs_n_sheets No, to me, telling them that others have it worse is pretty much like ignoring everything they just went through. "Oh you were molested? Well guess what, there are little girls sold to old men have to marry them for life". "Oh, you haven't ate for a day? THere are kids in Africa who are dying of starvation as we speak."
I get it, others have it worse, but we dpnt say it just to make it an opression olympics. And I think its interesting that you say many of us suffer in silence, which makes it worse. Well hello, why would we bring it up if you're not going to be empathetic? What is the point of telling you just to hear "others have been through worse so cheer up"? That isn't helpful to us.
I never said helping them seek treatment is downplaying it, I said making insensitve comments is. - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys Again, I never said to tell suicidal people that "others have it worse so move on". You're still not getting what I'm saying here. The point is to show them everyone has problems and that life for most people ain't all roses, and each problem can be addressed differently. There's enough research/knowledge and treatment to treat each case, and they SHOULD treat theirs no matter what.
- +1 y
@legs_n_sheets Then why bring it up?
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@BuchitaBuchys Because people need to see they aren't alone. Life is supposed to be shitty for virtually everyone, a and is unfairly even worse for some. I'm not against wanting to die, or expecting death with open arms. I get that. But it's inflicting yourself harm to take your own life. You shouldn't harm anyone, and no one should harm you, and you shouldn't harm yourself. The flawed logic in taking your own life is that you think it'll fix your problems, well, that may be true but at the expense of what? Inflicting pain to others, so now they should also kill themselves because they cannot stand the pain of losing you? See, that's the problem right there. It doesn't fix anything at all.
- +1 y
@legs_n_sheets you're proving Bandit's original point.
And again, bringing it up doesn't sound like its for support, it sounds insensitive. - +1 y
@BuchitaBuchys The reason I disagreed to Bandit's point is because wanting someone to live isn't selfish. Sure, they'll be hurt but any act out of love isn't selfish at all. Suicide is not an act of love, but an impulse for wanting release without considering their supposed "loved ones", but themselves. That's the reason why it's selfish.
- +1 y
And then again, fixing your problems at the expense of making other problems is flaw logic. How are you arguing that? It's like saying "oh, my neighbors make a lot of noise, I'll blow their house up so they can shut up and I can sleep tonight". Yeah, it fixes my problem at their expense. There are ways out of suicide.
- +1 y
@legs_n_sheets Then we disagree. If thats wht makes them happy, who are we to stop it.
2.8K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic. Yes it can be. Because the person you are in this world has touched and effected many people's lives
00 Reply- 1K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.
+1 yThe act itself is selfish yes but people are not in their right minds and the selfishness of others drove them to that point.
00 Reply Yes it is selfish, it is one of the worst thing you can do in this life.
10 Reply
Anonymous(30-35)+1 yYes and if you commit suicide, you'll wake up in hell.
02 Reply- +1 y
Not according to the Bible
Opinion Owner+1 y@Waffles731 Suicide is sin. God forbids murder (Exodus 20:13) and taking one's own life is murder. It is also sin because it fails to take into account the assurances of God's grace and mercy, of the compassionate High Priesthood of our Lord Jesus, and because it believes that there is no way out, but to sin. None of these are true. Taking one's life is to disobey God, and disobedience is sin. Suicide is also sin because it causes great suffering for those we leave behind. Suicide does not serve others for their good.
+1 yIt's the most selfish act one can commit, yup.
00 Reply
+1 yYes.
10 Reply
+1 yDefinitely.
10 Reply
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