Is it possible that a woman can be too sexy and scare men?

[curiousaboutmen]

I'm not saying I am; I'm just repeating what my married male friends tell me. Not that I will change to catch a man, I want one who loves me for me but I have to admit that it is so frustrating. I am pretty, fun, smart, creative and sexy. Granted, I'm not that successful being an artist and all but I keep trying. I'm getting my degree; changing careers. Yet finding a man who wants to just hang out is very difficult. I have recently turned 40 and wonder if men my age just have more baggage. I certainly do.

I don't know why I'm bothering asking this question here, but I get tons of compliments on my looks and my personality so I don't know what the problem is. Any guy that I've been interested in for the past four years runs from me like I have the cooties. Yes, I flirt to make it obvious that I'm interested but I don't think I'm coming on that strong.

Maybe I just have bad luck...

Updates

+1 y

I think it's highly unlikely as well. I think that it's because when I like a guy I get really nervous and am not myself. It's the way I act...

[Anonymous]

maybe they feel intimidated and cannot believe they would have any real chance with you, so they think you're just playing with them when you flirt..

I think you should flirt less and first try to become close friends to them that they get to know you and find out you're not that kind of person

[Anonymous]

Yeah that is totally possible. Just like women think guys with muscles and six packs must be arrogant jerks men think women that are too hot are good to look at but we assume they're too high maintenance or either out of our league.

[jimi_s]

Is it possible that you are too subtle in your flirting? Men, even the ones in their 40s are still pretty daft, sometimes. What do you mean running?

[curiousaboutmen]

I mean literally run away. One guy who is shy ran right away when I tried to talk to him. Turns out he has a girlfriend so I won't do that again. Another I've known for many years and always crushed but see him more frequently so it's grown. When I try to talk and flirt with him he runs away. Yet, I'm finding out that he likes for girls to chase him so he doesn't have to take responsibility when things go bad. A third guy...(to be continued)

[curiousaboutmen]

...I know is single and looking. He's a bit nerdy but I have a feeling that deep down there are some kinky fun things going on. So we flirted back and forth via email and text and then I see on his FB profile that he's gonna go speed dating. So I text him that I've wanted to try that too if only to get fodder for a new song. He stopped texting me back. I think he doesn't realize I like him.

I may be too subtle but I wasn't always considered sexy and such so I fear rejection like they do.

[swagger]

That all depends. Some men do not knwo how to take women who flirt as they feel it is their job to start the dance :) When a woman initiates it I guess it could be threatening.

Not for me though!

[Anonymous]

A lot of guys will shoot themselves in the foot and think a pretty girl is out of their league before they even say one word to her.

[-StillWater-]

Why is that?

I am simply fascinated by this fact...

[Snakeyes7]

It mainly boils down to confidence and past experience at this point. The incredibly pretty girls seem self centered and would crush a man’s self esteem and confidence whenever she has the chance. If they seem or are better off in life than they are then they think they would be terrible boyfriends anyway because the only way they feel like they are doing their part in a relationship is when they are able to provide for her. If she has everything going for her then he feels that he is of no use to her. That’s my theory why but I believe every man has his reasons.

[TheCheshireCat]

When sexy turns into slutty, yes.

[Laurie182]

they can find good looks intiminating

[mahalic007]

nahh its probably the way you act

[greenout420]

very possible although highly unlikely