Do you find quiet men unmanly?

Question

Ladies do you find quieter men to be unmanly? Or is it only if they are momma's boys, wusses or shy? Say a man has a stoic but very a more glib or cheerful personality when he talks to you, and he stands up for himself

Answer 1

Anonymous

Everyone is different and everyone has their own definition of what being a man or what "manliness" is about. I also fail to see why someone's manhood or toughness should come into question if they're the quieter more reserved type. I think what women (and people in general) care more about how you stand up for yourself, your beliefs and the values you hold. Guys that are extroverted and more socially eccentric by nature tend to communicate these things to women subconsciously by just being themselves. The plight of the quiet guys is that they are hard to figure out and are not the most active people when it comes to social foreplay. Although this may not be because they lack the social graces to be successful, they may simply want to avoid for other reasons. I myself tend to be very quiet but not because I am deathly afraid to talk or interact with people but because I am often over-analyzing things to the nth-degree.

Answer 2

ArtistBboy | 467 opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.

Guru

The "stereotype" for quiet men is so bizarre... It's full of sh*t basically.

The truth is that if you want anything - get it yourself. Meaning, if you want people to consider you manly, start standing out in crowds as a man.. If you want people to think you're not a momma's boy, start focusing on stuff that matters - like a job..etc.. Getting all these improvements in your life will certainly help people to notice you. But it really boils down to the simple fact of "avoiding the corner of the room" so that you can get out in a crowd and socialize.. The first step, is to say hello.

~ ArtistBBoy

Asker

+1 y
Well if I like a woman I ask her out, even if I don't know her. Obviously I get turned down a decent bit like anyone else. If I want to know someone I talk to them. Thing is I don't want to know most people, and I only talk when I have something to say.
ArtistBboy

+1 y
And how's that working for you? I was in your same boat and it didn't do so well for me.. but if it's working for you, then great!.. I guess the point I realized is that I might meet new job ventures/entrepreneurs/etc.. Basically, I didn't see any real harm or danger in networking cause I realized I didn't have to take "Every girl I met" on a date.. Ya know?
theydidntnameme

+1 y
i used to do that too. I think that's a big problem. don't talk only to people you're interested. I'm quiet too and I used to do that. try to talk to more people (other then ones you see as potential dates) because you never know what may happen or who they may be.
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ArtistBboy

+1 y
Exactly. :)

Answer 3

Asker

Well if I like a woman I ask her out, even if I don't know her. Obviously I get turned down a decent bit like anyone else. If I want to know someone I talk to them. Thing is I don't want to know most people, and I only talk when I have something to say.

Answer 4

ArtistBboy

And how's that working for you? I was in your same boat and it didn't do so well for me.. but if it's working for you, then great!.. I guess the point I realized is that I might meet new job ventures/entrepreneurs/etc.. Basically, I didn't see any real harm or danger in networking cause I realized I didn't have to take "Every girl I met" on a date.. Ya know?

Answer 5

theydidntnameme

i used to do that too. I think that's a big problem. don't talk only to people you're interested. I'm quiet too and I used to do that. try to talk to more people (other then ones you see as potential dates) because you never know what may happen or who they may be.

Answer 6

ArtistBboy

Exactly. :)

Answer 7

brifaye

Xper 6

I like boys who are quiet, I find that usually they are more thoughtful than a boy that is always in the center of attention. Also, I'm a super shy, quiet girl, and wouldn't be able to fight over a guy that was too loud or attention grabbing. I think that as long as he is secure in himself, it's better for him to be on the quiet side. As for the momma's boy, being quiet doesn't make you one, and at least in my opinion, momma's boys are usually the more cocky boys.

Asker

+1 y
Why would women fight over a loud-mouth blow hard?
brifaye

+1 y
I don't know, but a lot of them do...it makes no sense to me.
Asker

+1 y
Personally I would find it more likely if women were to compete over good looking, rich, intelligent and have a huge ****.
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brifaye

+1 y
Honestly, I don't look for wealth or a huge d***. Just nice, semi-intelligent, not a total douchebag, and as long as his d*** is 4+ inches it's OK with me.
Asker

+1 y
Don't knock it til ya try it (:
brifaye

+1 y
I don't knock anything before thoroughly trying it, but I'm not about to fight for a guy just because he's rich and has a big d***. I don't fight for any guy that wouldn't fight for me, rich guys usually don't have to fight for anything they're whole life (just speaking from my own experience, not stereotyping).
Asker

+1 y
All I'm saying is a lot of girls I know didn't think size mattered until they were with a guy that had a thick one

Answer 8

Asker

Why would women fight over a loud-mouth blow hard?

Answer 9

brifaye

I don't know, but a lot of them do...it makes no sense to me.

Answer 10

Asker

Personally I would find it more likely if women were to compete over good looking, rich, intelligent and have a huge ****.

Answer 11

brifaye

Honestly, I don't look for wealth or a huge d***. Just nice, semi-intelligent, not a total douchebag, and as long as his d*** is 4+ inches it's OK with me.

Answer 12

Asker

Don't knock it til ya try it (:

Answer 13

brifaye

I don't knock anything before thoroughly trying it, but I'm not about to fight for a guy just because he's rich and has a big d***. I don't fight for any guy that wouldn't fight for me, rich guys usually don't have to fight for anything they're whole life (just speaking from my own experience, not stereotyping).

Answer 14

Asker

All I'm saying is a lot of girls I know didn't think size mattered until they were with a guy that had a thick one

Answer 15

Hello_World10

Xper 3

Um. I usually think they don't like me but I learned from a classmate. He said that people think he is mad but usually that his thinking face. So, I don't think too much about it. I like when people are nice and friendly because that is who they are. I hate fake people but it never hurt to be nice to people. Just never act like you are better than another person, that is a major turn off.

Answer 16

Minxxe

Xper 4

stoic and moody are both fine with me, as long as he has a sense of humour and decency. whereas mummy's boys kiss-arse's and cheapskates are unmanly and a big turn off.

Asker

+1 y
I don't find anything particularly manly about not paying for a woman's dinner or kissing a** to try and get a** lol

Answer 17

Asker

I don't find anything particularly manly about not paying for a woman's dinner or kissing a** to try and get a** lol

Answer 18

Anonymous

the majority of women like quiet guys i'm one, think tall dark and silent and also think of james dean, even Che Guevara had a way with the ladies and he was an introvert, even think of bruce wayne / batman, ladies love men who are more how can i say this stoic yet good hearted not wussy or kiss asses, i've been around women who have had lots of very loud admirers and would put them on a pedstal i however never do that and those guys lost and i won all the time and quite frankly go read womens literture say like twilight and 50 shades grey and you'll see that as long as your confident and not a fake you'll do fine go look at clint eastwood he's quiet and stoic and look at him, you need to look around you and use resence to your advantage that way you shine out among others like in this advert:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxUnI368NS8

hope this helps :)

Answer 19

deathnote

Xper 5

Quiet guys are a charm. They are manly in every way don't don't act like something they're not. I wish people would appreciate them more! They are so mysterious and I want to find out more about them. I've been with my guy for 3 years now and I had a feeling about him I just wanted to know everything about him and I ended up REALLY liking him :)

Answer 20

udolipixie | 798 opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.

Guru

I find them creepy.

Manly is based on a guy's character.

Asker

+1 y
Why?
udolipixie

+1 y
Quiet guys are either socially awkward, insecure, or stoic.

Being socially awkward is creepy because it shows a lack of interaction & intepreting acceptable behavior.

Being insecure is creepy because it may lead to depression or desperation or show a lack of self esteem/confidence.

Being stoic is creepy because I get a sociopath vibe.
Asker

+1 y
Well what if the guy just prefers to be quiet most of the time, and opens up with the woman he is dating, family and friends? Might be worth pointing out that most sociopathic serial killers were described by their neighbors as "the nice guy" and that they couldn't believe such a nice guy could possibly torture and rape women and kids and burn the remains in a furnace. Real sociopaths are often extremely charming and very good at pretending to be human.
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udolipixie

+1 y
I know all about sociopaths. They have a charming persona when active/engaging others not by themselves hence when I see a quiet guy when passive I get sociopath vibe.

Well what if the guy just prefers to be quiet most of the time, and opens up with the woman he is dating, family and friends?

Not creepy but not my type.
AnOn-71

+1 y
I don't think I've met a bigger idiot then you. By the way, do you ever sleep? All you do is hate on men 24 hrs a day. And I know the reason why. Men don't give you the time of day & that I know for a fact. Whoever sits on site like this ALL fricken DAY is the SOCIALLY AWKWARD one. Another fact. Sorry, had to say it, my opinion.
udolipixie

+1 y
Allday? I come on here a few hours a day. Are you on here all day to verify thatI am?

Men attractive men give me time.

Show me this so called man hate.

How is finding quiet guys creepy stupid? Let me guess you're offended because you're quiet?

If you weren't so narrow minded you'd see I put manly is based on character meaning I don't think they're unmanly just creepy.
udolipixie

+1 y
Man hate? Seriously show one.

I find it funny that not liking quiet guys, prefering a big d*ck, not liking unattractive guys, and giving rape stats is defined as man hate.
Asker

+1 y
Well, there are some quiet guys that have a big **** and aren't ugly or disrespectful to women
udolipixie

+1 y
Why are you so settled on me liking quiet guys.

Some girls like them, some don't mind, and some don't like them.

I'm the latter because I find them creepy because they are usually either socially awkward, insecure, or stoic.

Having a few qualities I want won't disqualify the creepy factor.

Just like for my guys/girls you can be the perfect match but if you're ugly/average it won't happen.
Asker

+1 y
Well it comes down to a matter of social normalcy. In America, it is more normal for men to be extroverted and in women's faces about what they want. I think extroversion gets mistaken for self confidence here in the West. Personally I know a lot of extremely insecure people that need constant validation and attention from their friends, despite being extremely personable and outgoing.
udolipixie

+1 y
Actually in America it's normal for both genders to be extroverts.

On the case of aggressiveness you're right that's a "male" trait.

Some might mistake being an extrovery for confidence but I don't I know any one can be insecure. It's just a quiet guy is more likely to be insecure.

What was your point? I know insecurity isn't limited to quiet guys & I don't mistake being an extrovert for confidence.

It doesn't change the fact I find quiet guys creepy.
Asker

+1 y
But you should date who you are attracted to (:
udolipixie

+1 y
I do date who I'm attracted to & quiet guys aren't it.
Asker

+1 y
I can see that, personally I couldn't date someone so quiet they can't open up to me, but I wouldn't care if she was quiet in front of other people. I think women tend to prefer outgoing men and that in general quiet guys are left out to dry lol
udolipixie

+1 y
Most people like outgoing people.

Just like most people prefer attractive partners & ugly guys/girls (girls more so because guys are judged more on character) are usually left out.

Do you think it's because you're quiet that you won't mind?

People will like what they like.
Asker

+1 y
Most people like people that like them and people that are like them. This is because most people understandably like themselves and are familiar with people that are like them and like the same things that they like. Because most Americans have an extroverted personality (MBTI) they like other extroverts.

In some other countries where consensus is valued, I think those that are too loud or too extroverted are possibly seen as self-centered, ignorant or rude.
Asker

+1 y
I don't think to be extroverted is to have a better character. If someone has a bad personality and they are very extroverted, they're just an annoying.
udolipixie

+1 y
Cool.

So you dislike extrovert guys/girls.

And I prefer not to date introvert guys.
Asker

+1 y
No I prefer to date more bubbly outgoing women actually, because I'm pretty laid back and those are the women that usually hit on me lol
udolipixie

+1 y
I always found that funny when a guy complains that women finds/views a trait he has as a negative but prefers to date women without that date.

It's like if you prefer to date someone without the trait why can't you get an idea of why they'd prefer to date someone without the trait.

Whatever.
Asker

+1 y
Well I date a lot of different types of women, because I care more about things like how smart she is and whether she shares my extremely old-fashioned morals when it comes to relationships and sex. Out of the 4 girls I've dated, 2 asked me out and I asked the other 2 out.
Asker

+1 y
But since I have remained a virgin so I can't be manly by definition, according to society. Because all real men have to sow their seed.
udolipixie

+1 y
Sowing your seeds doesn't make you manly that's just a gender role most guys want to keep so they can be free to slut about.

Manly is based on a guy's character.

Answer 21

udolipixie

Quiet guys are either socially awkward, insecure, or stoic.

Being socially awkward is creepy because it shows a lack of interaction & intepreting acceptable behavior.

Being insecure is creepy because it may lead to depression or desperation or show a lack of self esteem/confidence.

Being stoic is creepy because I get a sociopath vibe.

Answer 22

Asker

Well what if the guy just prefers to be quiet most of the time, and opens up with the woman he is dating, family and friends? Might be worth pointing out that most sociopathic serial killers were described by their neighbors as "the nice guy" and that they couldn't believe such a nice guy could possibly torture and rape women and kids and burn the remains in a furnace. Real sociopaths are often extremely charming and very good at pretending to be human.

Answer 23

udolipixie

I know all about sociopaths. They have a charming persona when active/engaging others not by themselves hence when I see a quiet guy when passive I get sociopath vibe.

Well what if the guy just prefers to be quiet most of the time, and opens up with the woman he is dating, family and friends?

Not creepy but not my type.

Answer 24

AnOn-71

I don't think I've met a bigger idiot then you. By the way, do you ever sleep? All you do is hate on men 24 hrs a day. And I know the reason why. Men don't give you the time of day & that I know for a fact. Whoever sits on site like this ALL fricken DAY is the SOCIALLY AWKWARD one. Another fact. Sorry, had to say it, my opinion.

Answer 25

udolipixie

Allday? I come on here a few hours a day. Are you on here all day to verify thatI am?

Men attractive men give me time.

Show me this so called man hate.

How is finding quiet guys creepy stupid? Let me guess you're offended because you're quiet?

If you weren't so narrow minded you'd see I put manly is based on character meaning I don't think they're unmanly just creepy.

Answer 26

udolipixie

Man hate? Seriously show one.

I find it funny that not liking quiet guys, prefering a big d*ck, not liking unattractive guys, and giving rape stats is defined as man hate.

Answer 27

Asker

Well, there are some quiet guys that have a big **** and aren't ugly or disrespectful to women

Answer 28

udolipixie

Why are you so settled on me liking quiet guys.

Some girls like them, some don't mind, and some don't like them.

I'm the latter because I find them creepy because they are usually either socially awkward, insecure, or stoic.

Having a few qualities I want won't disqualify the creepy factor.

Just like for my guys/girls you can be the perfect match but if you're ugly/average it won't happen.

Answer 29

Asker

Well it comes down to a matter of social normalcy. In America, it is more normal for men to be extroverted and in women's faces about what they want. I think extroversion gets mistaken for self confidence here in the West. Personally I know a lot of extremely insecure people that need constant validation and attention from their friends, despite being extremely personable and outgoing.

Answer 30

udolipixie

Actually in America it's normal for both genders to be extroverts.

On the case of aggressiveness you're right that's a "male" trait.

Some might mistake being an extrovery for confidence but I don't I know any one can be insecure. It's just a quiet guy is more likely to be insecure.

What was your point? I know insecurity isn't limited to quiet guys & I don't mistake being an extrovert for confidence.

It doesn't change the fact I find quiet guys creepy.

Answer 31

Asker

But you should date who you are attracted to (:

Answer 32

udolipixie

I do date who I'm attracted to & quiet guys aren't it.

Answer 33

Asker

I can see that, personally I couldn't date someone so quiet they can't open up to me, but I wouldn't care if she was quiet in front of other people. I think women tend to prefer outgoing men and that in general quiet guys are left out to dry lol

Answer 34

udolipixie

Most people like outgoing people.

Just like most people prefer attractive partners & ugly guys/girls (girls more so because guys are judged more on character) are usually left out.

Do you think it's because you're quiet that you won't mind?

People will like what they like.

Answer 35

Asker

Most people like people that like them and people that are like them. This is because most people understandably like themselves and are familiar with people that are like them and like the same things that they like. Because most Americans have an extroverted personality (MBTI) they like other extroverts.

In some other countries where consensus is valued, I think those that are too loud or too extroverted are possibly seen as self-centered, ignorant or rude.

Answer 36

Asker

I don't think to be extroverted is to have a better character. If someone has a bad personality and they are very extroverted, they're just an annoying.

Answer 37

udolipixie

Cool.

So you dislike extrovert guys/girls.

And I prefer not to date introvert guys.

Answer 38

Asker

No I prefer to date more bubbly outgoing women actually, because I'm pretty laid back and those are the women that usually hit on me lol

Answer 39

udolipixie

I always found that funny when a guy complains that women finds/views a trait he has as a negative but prefers to date women without that date.

It's like if you prefer to date someone without the trait why can't you get an idea of why they'd prefer to date someone without the trait.

Whatever.

Answer 40

Asker

Well I date a lot of different types of women, because I care more about things like how smart she is and whether she shares my extremely old-fashioned morals when it comes to relationships and sex. Out of the 4 girls I've dated, 2 asked me out and I asked the other 2 out.

Answer 41

Asker

But since I have remained a virgin so I can't be manly by definition, according to society. Because all real men have to sow their seed.

Answer 42

udolipixie

Sowing your seeds doesn't make you manly that's just a gender role most guys want to keep so they can be free to slut about.

Manly is based on a guy's character.

Answer 43

Anonymous

Being loud/quiet has absolutely nothing to do with manliness. Quiet people can be just as manly if not more manly than loud, obnoxious, attention seeking men. Loud people can get annoying anyway.

Manliness is about being tough (on the inside mostly). Being a man is about being able to handle all the sh*t that life throws at you and never being a wimp or softcock; which means NO CRYING.

Answer 44

MrReal | 112 opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.

Xper 6

Do I find mimes manly?... link Sure.

Answer 45

teetertotter95

Xper 3

Sounds more manly than a guy who is always in the middle of everything, to be honest. But like you said, he's gotta stand up for himself. That also goes for his beliefs, not just regular taunting and teasing. If someone challenges him in a debate of philosophy or politics, he'll hold his ground and not duck his head. You've gotta be mature to do that, to actually disagree with someone.

Answer 46

jujubeetzzz

Xper 6

i know a guy just like that...liked him for a year or so

turned out he was full of himself tho and he told me he hadn't found anyone worth the time to try and date! psh!

Asker

+1 y
What if he had said he hadn't found the right woman yet
jujubeetzzz

+1 y
thats pretty much what he said...whats your point? I just think he's a jerk..i like him and he said that?!
Asker

+1 y
Well if you're really quiet you don't meet a lot of people, or perhaps you believe in soul mates. I know I haven't met the right woman yet. As I am very passive and quiet.
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jujubeetzzz

+1 y
he acts like he has way more friends than me...but he just hangs out with his nerd friends. idk
Asker

+1 y
Sounds like he's high off the smell of his own s***. I don't have any friends at all, though.
jujubeetzzz

+1 y
dang

Answer 47

Asker

What if he had said he hadn't found the right woman yet

Answer 48

jujubeetzzz

thats pretty much what he said...whats your point? I just think he's a jerk..i like him and he said that?!

Answer 49

Asker

Well if you're really quiet you don't meet a lot of people, or perhaps you believe in soul mates. I know I haven't met the right woman yet. As I am very passive and quiet.

Answer 50

jujubeetzzz

he acts like he has way more friends than me...but he just hangs out with his nerd friends. idk

Answer 51

Asker

Sounds like he's high off the smell of his own s***. I don't have any friends at all, though.

Answer 52

jujubeetzzz

dang

Answer 53

doctorwhofan23 | 1.1K opinions shared on Society & Politics topic.

Guru

Wow lots of lies here. Yes girls do not like quiet guys and all the ones who say the do lied. The might say quiet is good but look at the guys they date. Are they quiet. The facts have spoken.

Answer 54

Apodyopsis

Xper 4

I find them intriguing. I'm currently crushing on this unbelievably calm quiet guy, and he's so mysterious to me. I'm dying to figure him out.

I'm the exact opposite, so it kind of balances it out.