Sometimes violence is justified when someone verbally disrespects you or someone you care about. Agree or Disagree?

[Still-alive]

Yes its another question regarding the slap lol.

just gotta know from this poll here where people stand

Strongly agree. if you disrespect me or someone close to me i care about sometimes violence is justified

Agree. It's justified

Disagree. it isn't justified

Strongly disagree. no amount of words spoken to disrespect you can justify ANY violence even if its just a slap for instance

undecided

Updates

+1 y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVnz2v1CPKw

[Aerissa_Jade]

As I don't watch TV of any kind, didn't know about this until I saw all the questions but there are other ways to handle this... like screaming profanities in his face and spitting on him, ruining the regular scheduled show so they can't stay on schedule and it makes them mess things up.

Giving hand jesters and making a big scene, or getting up and leaving and never going back to that shit show of a stupid awards ceremony anyways. Refusing any awards they offer to you, say this piece of shit is not worth it and throwing it on the ground and destroying it on live TV.

Assaulting someone, is never justified no matter what they say.

[On_cloud_wine]

Not justified. I’d be a reckless human being if I let everyone who got to me control my behavior and emotions. Jesus

[On_cloud_wine]

And I do t even say God’s name in vain but I’m making the exception because it’s have vain half praise. He’s what keeps my inner peace at bay lol

[Gigi2019]

I have answered and remarked on this scandal in sooo many GAG posts. I will say this.

My mother was frail and helpless when she was finally moved to her hospice. I was there when she was moved and I held a vigil at her bedside for a week before she died. Mom had a series of strokes due to end stage congestive heart failure. She was in great pain whenever anyone would slightly brush against her skin and she would moan in such pain, everytime. While she was being positioned in her hospital bed, a CNA roughly grabbed my Mom's shoulder and shoved her hard down into the mattress. It was a completely unnecessary act. My mom could not hold herself up in a seated position due to the extensive abdominal muscle damage she had sustained over another health problem. It was like this dumb, super abusive nursing assistant was channeling WWFE. Anyway, before this had happened, I had stepped out of the room for a second to ask her doctor a question. When I saw this go down, it took every ounce of restraint for me not to go into that room and slap the shit out of that crazy CNA for intentionally hurting my Mom. If my mom had only been verbally abused during her stay at that hell hole, would I still have felt angry enough to strike someone? Yes. However, I was there for my Mom. I was not there to act on my wishes. Had I gotten into a physical fight with the CNA who hurt her, I would have been banned from that hospital and I would not have been able to stay with my mother until she passed. I lodged a formal complaint against the CNA. I prayed about the situation. I let it go.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Oftentimes in life, you cannot just do as you please. There are almost always severe consequences for yourself and for those you care about. However, never let someone or something just run over you or those you love. Find acceptable ways of fighting back.

Will Smith should have thought long and hard before acting. Surely he knew that he would just end up apologizing to Chris Rock in the end? It was hardly worth it.

[KerryJulia78fd]

Let me put it this way; publicly mocking someone's appearance is a very low method comedians use of embarassing someone at their expense. Like it or not; women are raised in a society that emphasizes extreme imporance on their level of attractiveness and appearance, which is obviously a very vulnerable subject due to these f*cked up societal norms. Both things can be true in that; public humilation of a woman or loved one with a medical condition that is embarassing for the person is a low blow; even for a comedian. While ALSO; physically assaulting someone is dangerous and doesn't have a place in our society expect for EXTREME situations. Such extreme situations include (this is a hypothetical scenario) A father catches a pedophile trying to predate his child. THAT is a situation where I feel physical assault is 100% necessary and hopefully the courts would dismiss a case where a father did that. So anyways; in specific terms of the Will Smith and Chris Rock incident at the Oscars; there are 2 ways of viewing the situation; no one is 100% right and no one is 100% wrong.

[ohshee]

Words. That people speak only hurt if they are true
And if they are true and someone says them to you.. and hurts you they are not hurting you the words didn't hurt you you hurt yourself by doing what ever it is you did.

You can call me every name in the book and I will probably agree with you that's just because I'm a bigger person than that

If you say something about my friends or my family and if they have it coming oh well

If you say something about my friends or family and it's not true you're just being a jackass I will walk up and whisper in your ear be careful I wouldn't go there.
Just to make a point

No amount of violence is going to get you anywhere
I don't like violence I would rather walk away
You can say a lot of things to me you could probably even hit me in the face once and I can still walk away and you can keep calling me names and I can still walk away it all depends on what it's about because I'm only going to take so much and you can say the word *the* to me and I can turn around I will have eye to eye contact and I'm going to give you everything that you want.
And I'm hoping that I take that Split Second to think about it before I do what I'm going to do because it really is just not worth it

Like I said I don't like violence because I know what I'm capable of and that's the last thing in the world I want to do is hurt somebody
For me violence is never Justified
If you're picking on a kid if you're hitting a kid if you're hitting a girl a woman a mother grandmother
If you are kicking your dog out of using your pet
And I see any part of it I'm going to stop you and it's going to be your choice on how it's done if you resist and keep doing it I don't care how big you are I'm going to stop you that's the only time it's Justified for me anyway

[HighlyVolatile]

I agree in some cases although I seem to be quite outspoken here. Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong century since my notions of honor and code of conduct revolving around it don't exclude violence. The greatest ideal I prize in a man is a protector and not just one who protects other people from physical harm but also protects their sense of dignity and honor.

Violence in the context of protecting someone from a direct assault of any form to either their physical safety or dignity is justifiable as I see it. Most people at least agree with me that it's justifiable in the case of protecting others from physical assaults damaging someone's physical health, but I merely take it a step further to include direct assaults on someone's dignity and honor.

Beyond verbal assaults, say another man grabs my wife's ass. That does her no physical harm. Her life isn't in danger. Yet honor -- and I'm fine with people conflating honor to pride, but it's a type of pride that enforces order and protects dignities -- demands that I lay my hands on him, perhaps violently shoving him away in this case and ready to fight over this.

Yet the boundaries for when I think a violent response is justifiable are fairly clear and established. It's not some "micro-aggression". It's not insulting a man. It doesn't have to leave comedians guessing about what they can joke about. Above all else, it's directly laying assault on the dignity and honor of his family.

So I'm not sure if younger generations are aware of this rule, but the top rule of thumb is to never insult a man's wife. We can insult him, we can insult women in general, but never insult a man's wife because if that man shares my values, then it's not only expected but moral as I see it for him to stand up and protect her and violence is not off the table.

[HighlyVolatile]

I see it up to us individually to enforce some sense of order, because we can't expect the law to do it perfectly. I would not want to live in a society where it's illegal for men to insult other men's wives, for example, since first laws tend to come with their share of perverse incentives that are prone to be abused, and second because throwing people in prison over such a small thing doesn't resolve disputes. I also think it's overkill.

At the same time, gossiping and trying to ruin someone's reputation from behind their back, even within lawful constraints, are also off the table to me. That conflicts with my notions of honor. It also does far more damage and generally doesn't resolve disputes.

So since the tools of law and gossip and backstabbing are off the table, that leaves only direct confrontation when people cross the most extreme lines that should never become considered acceptable for people to cross. For such direct confrontations spurned by the desire to protect our wives, for example, I think diplomacy is always the best default but I don't consider it immoral to retaliate, and violence can sometimes be a useful tool to resolve conflicts.

If we use violence in an honorable and merciful way, we do it to protect and build, not to destroy. Two men can have an honorable fistfight as I see it, and if they are men of honor, the winner might even mercifully help the loser back up to his feet and they are now ready for diplomacy. I think as counter-intuitive as it might be to some, the greatest alliances can be forged from such violent disputes, and I've made some very close friends this way. The end result is a level of mutual respect I think we'd rarely find if one were to tuck their tail between his legs and run, or resort to backstabbing and gossipping and snitching types of ways.

[HighlyVolatile]

With Will Smith's case though, I am a bit confused from a moral perspective about what to optimally do even according to my own code of conduct. There's this ambiguity that confuses me since it's a comedy act roasting celebrities. I can't say he's in the wrong though for protecting his wife. At the very least what he did fits into what I consider to still be an honorable and direct and honest way of approaching things.

Maybe heckling would have been better? He could boo and hurl insults at Chris Rock, and maybe try to turn him into the brunt of the joke. Then slap him after the show.

[HighlyVolatile]

Also, all he did was slap Chris Rock. It was even funny to me. If people talk about sticks and stones being able to break bones, slaps can't break bones. Slaps don't even require a doctor's visit. Chris Rock is perfectly fine. It's not like Will Smith threw a haymaker and knocked him out or pulled out a knife and stabbed him. It's a simple slap.

[IMuser]

I have a doubt: is someone's honor, someone dignity so fragile that anyone can influence it?

I very well agree on your honor code, that if someone disrespects your loved ones, you stand up for them. Heck I don't even mind including violence if needed. But is it actually right? This makes our sense of worth dependent upon external factors.

[HighlyVolatile]

@IMuser It's something I cannot say on other people's behalf. If I was the one suffering a condition that someone insulted, then I would not find it warrant for retaliation. That would definitely fall short of my Stoic ideals if I failed to let such a thing slide.

Yet if it's someone I love who looks up to me to protect them from harm and indignities, then I don't hold them responsible to become as thick-skinned as possible. I play out my role as a protector in this exchange, and that's where I internalize the honor through the course of actions I take in either attempting to protect or failing to protect.

The external consequences of my actions don't matter so much as my choice to protect or not to protect. I think I further shocked some people on another Q related to this expressing approval for Will Smith's actions but also saying I should be arrested if I did the same thing, and maybe even get my ass kicked if I retaliated against the wrong man. I still see that action as good and noble.

[IMuser]

If the external consequences of your actions had a far more brutal impact on you and your relationship THAN just letting the issue slide, what would you choose? Ignore the situation OR face the consequences?

[HighlyVolatile]

@IMuser I generally can't forecast the consequences of such actions. If I knew with certainty what the future holds against every possible course of action, I see no point in morality as a guide against unknowns. If I knew in advance that helping a hitchhiker would result in him killing me and my family, then it would not be moral as I see it to help that hitchhiker. Maybe I should swerve off the road and hit him with my car.

[IMuser]

Or maybe you should just ignore the hitchhiker? Nevertheless, i believe i got your point of view. Thanks

[HighlyVolatile]

@IMuser Cheers. Well, I'm a fallible being a flawed man. I know my thoughts don't allow me to perfectly blend into modern civilization and aren't always in accordance with laws. But that's where I derive the greatest meaning and sense of purpose, and so I'm not willing to give it up. In the end, I just want to die having lived a life I might reflect on and say that I erred on the side of protecting my loved ones rather than abandoning them. It might end up being a very short life. I'm often rather surprised that I made it this far (although I have my share of disorderly conduct on my record). How long I might live will largely depend on how many people attack the ones I love because there's nothing I consider more important than erring on the side of protecting them in those cases.

[NailPolishLover]

I don't think it's justified. I try my best to work things out with someone. If one disagrees then fine, but don't try to force your beliefs onto me, or others. It's one thing to say, "I disagree with guys painting their nails." I of course think guys and girls can wear nail polish. Yes, it's really just paint. Then, to do out of your way and act on it. So, for example, if someone decided to take nail polish remover just to make my nails masculine. When, I love color on my nails is wrong. I have painted my nails black before. You remove black nail polish off of me, just to get rid of it all. That's what I would have problems with. If you like, or dislike my nails, as long as you don't act on it. Then, it's totally fine to say your opinion on it. I have a right to say a dress doesn't like pretty on a guy. If you are a guy, and disagree. Then, you shouldn't be disrespectful to me, or my family. Because, you disagree with me, for saying guys shouldn't wear dresses.

. This is a girl in a purple dress and has purple nails.

This is the kind of dress, I would love to wear. I would love latex on my body. However, since I'm a guy, I obviously can't do that. Besides, would you love to see me in a latex dress?

[NathanDavis]

case by case... depends on the circumstances

in this case, I think it was very wrong

as for myself, personally, I would never feel justified to use violence BUT I would still do it if it were necessary, and I have done it, unfortunately... but that case was way more than just a joke

for jokes, I've never hit anybody

[StoneFree]

If you watched criminal documentaries you can somewhat tell where that criminal is coming from and form empathy for them...

But I wouldn't go as far as to say, their circumstances justify their crime.

It's like watching Joker in the Dark Knight... you get where he is coming from... but you can also tell what's wrong with his approach.

[Kaamraj]

I would agree that violence is justified only when there is the imminent or actual threat of violence and to deter the violence, violence is required. However, there are some racial slurs that are so insulting and one sided that violence is justified if things to overboard. Especially in countries where there have been massacres and pogroms against the said race or minority.

[Lookingforthetruth]

Expect most to say no. Most men on this site are straight up pussies which is why they would rather chase women behind a computer screen and use this site as a dating app. Women by very nature tend to avoid physical confrontation and choose to attack psychologically.

[dustybiker]

By law in a number of places tossing a drink at someone and or spraying them with a hose is considered assault.

[dustybiker]

Justified, no. Feels good to defend family and friends, yes.

[AndrésC64]

Absolutely disagree and the fact that he did it and that the Academy let and get away with it sets an extremely dangerous precedent. So the next time anyone says something that anyone else gets offended by they can just go up there and assault them. He should have been immediately removed from the premises. I guess it will make the Oscars more entertaining.

[artstatues]

Disagree
Violence is the answer, only if you are trapped, or in case of danger or threat to the people you love and they need help. If someone verbally disrespects, you can get back to them with words

[England4eva]

Politicians are constantly offending each other, most of the time deliberately too. No one slaps or punches their rivals. Many many mean words are spoken, and projected at the opposing team. No one gets hurt.

[menina]

I would say that sometimes is justified but it depends on many factors. But of course it's better if you can solve the issue without resorting to violence.

[CrazyGirl2]

No! Violence because of words is NEVER justified! Violence against someone is only ever justified in the defense of yourself, or somebody else…PERIOD!

[TyLeeAndPink]

If the abuse is strictly verbal, absolutely no physical action is required, unless you are being threatened/blackmailed.

[Koneko911]

Disagree. U can't fucking assault someone over a joke

[RolandCuthbert]

Apparently, in my group we have folks who feel that way. We were arguing this over a week. It was crazy. I am still struggling with this.

[Screamsgutter]

How many times in film and on television have we seen a women slap a man across the face because he may have said something she didn't like?

[EnglishEuropean]

Seeing this for the first time, that was brutal! Everyone is laughing, then pow! And Jada at the end... we have seen the true face of evil!

The worst thing about it? What Chris said wasn't even that bad.

[Anonymous]

Adults should know how to control their own emotions, that said i don't have a problem with a slap. Words can be ignored.

What Chris did however was in very bad taste humiliating his wife.

[jasco]

I am sorry but no its not. Unless someone has threaten you and has shown that he/she has the ability to do so, you have no reason to put your hands on someone.

[ScaredGayManWithBPD]

Since when is GIJane offensive? Am I missing something? I thought it was a bold feminist move to make that film. Plus, to then cast a black women would take that bold move one step further. Correct?

I'm definitely confused by this odd reaction.

[Deathraider]

I mean I think it’s a bit much. I’d express my disapproval at such a low hanging fruit for comedy, but probably more verbally and less physically.

[Cringe]

I wonder if he slapped the guy when his wife cheated on him 🤣

[Dinosaursandanime65]

[zagor]

Depends on the details.

And Chris Rock did not burst into tears like in the animation.

[zagor]

You have to choose your battles. Else you spend half your life fighting idiots, which would be a pretty good indication you are also one.

[Randy888]

over a joke? No hitting him was uncalled for.

[Still-alive]

i mean for ANY reason verbally?

[Randy888]

it depends on what the person says. In some situations yes?

[Still-alive]

Not really. Im against escalating from words to violence

[ETEQdotCOM]

don't let your tongue get your teeth knocked out...

[sp33d]

Disagree. Violence is justified only as a response to violence.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Disagree. it isn't justified

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Nobody else thinks it's just a PR Gimick?

[supercutebutt]

It seemed like an act when I saw it live and censored. But after seeing the uncensored footage and watching the reactions afterwards, including Will Smith's speech later in the night, it was evident it was very real.

[llorando]

Disagree, violence never solves anything.

[NorthwestRider]

Will Smith is a Looney nut and a threat to society

[xJayleenx]

Disagree

[TX651]

Yes.