Do you think you are in control of your fate?

[Anonymous]

Or do you think your fate is sealed, or maybe you think it's in between 🤔

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

A very complicated question to me, because I don't really believe in freedom of choice. I believe in... Freedom to discover, over time, that our choices were not the choices we thought they were. It's a vision of life where life is made of appearances, constantly challenging me, you, to realize something we didn't.

I believe that what I am, what you all are, has been determined, a lot, by many things escaping our reach. External influence. Such as upbringing, education from parents, culture of locations we lived in, people we've met who influenced us, role models, either true or fictional.

For the things that aren't determined by external influences, then I believe they are determined from internal influence. Which means, to me, that I am, and you all are, governed, again, by something within. I think we are, barely, just barely the master of our own mental houses. Because this house is weird and wild, it sees and wants things, many things potentially contradicting each other.

Having said that, what agency is left, in my eyes? I don't know. What I know is that the more I grow old, the more I'm looking through the mirror and see... Something I didn't know was there. And it has been quite a trip, for me, to look at that lol

[Asker]

That is actually a very interesting perspective, kinda like how all our decisions are just part of a much bigger cell, not necessarily freedom, which may be true but at the end of the day we do make those decisions, so if you think of it, the biggest cell of all is our minds, we make decisions but the capacity we have to think and process have limitations, and that effects our decisions, very interesting 🤔

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Glad to put more thoughts on thoughts, that's my job lol

[WindAtMyBack]

If you play a game of pool, once you hit the cue ball to break, everything has been determined. The cue ball of the universe was hit billions of years ago. Everything since then was determined at that time. There is no such thing as fate. There is no such thing as true choice. It's all a big state-machine. At any given moment the universe is at a certain state. Anything that happens can't happen any other way.

We have something that we call choice. In language that has a meaning. But it's not true choice, it's simply multiple possibilities, and we don't yet know which one will happen. The balls on the pool table can move left or right, they can bounce off a bumper, or they can go in a pocket. But they don't have a choice in the matter. It's already been determined.

Of course thinking too much like this would make life weird. Whether everything was determined billions of years ago or not, we still have a functioning brain that thinks. "I think. I think I am. Therefore I am.". We call this process thinking. We call it making decisions. And that is fine. We gotta call it something, so "choice" is as good a word as any. This process is what makes us alive. Hopefully it's enjoyable. No use letting the reality of the universe get in the way of enjoying life.

[Simslover92]

I used to believe in fate but I don't anymore. I believe we are in control of our decisions and those decisions will lead us down a certain path. It could be good or it could be bad but fate doesn't exist because of free will. God gave us free will to do whatever. Free will negates fate.

[Asker]

Does it tho? Do you not believe that if someone else made a decision and that decision lead to your death that the odds of that not having a form of meaning beyond it just being a coincidence is far more likely than it just being all out of chance? Because something as simple as your death being a good example of what not to do and it helps others acknowledge that lesson, kinda already gives your death a form of purpose don't it

[Simslover92]

Perhaps it gives them a warning but then that just means they will be choosing not to do whatever it was that caused my death. It's a choice. Like let's say I died from alcohol poisoning then they will choose not to consume alcohol or not that much of it. That's a choice not fate.

[Asker]

Can't that not be your fate helping them make better choices that helped them change their fate? Your death could've stopped them from going down that same hole tho 🤔

[Asker]

You choices lead to your fate but your choices and fate helped them make better choices that changed their fate to another fate

[Simslover92]

Nope I chose to consume all that alcohol. That's not fate that's free will. Just like it would be free will for them to choose to not consume alcohol or as much of it because of my choice.

[Simslover92]

Fate doesn't exist. It's just something made up by people who don't want to take responsibility for their choices.

[Asker]

It's free will but it being free will doesn't change that you have a fate, a fate doesn't have to be destined, it just has to be written, your choices can lead to your fate, your choices give you control of your fate, for the most part, that's if it's not destined, because personally if a bullet comes flying through your window from a shootout a block away, there's no other way to put that, you decided to sit on the couch at that specific moment but what does that free will really change there? That you could've avoided it? If your death is inevitable and unpredictable then how is free will an advantage over fate.

[Asker]

Or how does it debunk it, sounds to me like free will is a part of fate, sounds like fate counts on free will to function.

[Simslover92]

I think we're going to have to agree to disagree on this one. I just don't believe in it anymore because if fate were real then I would still be with my ex and we would be married and have kids. How we met seemed to be by chance because I could have not been at the school that summer but I realize now I chose to be there and it wasn't fate that brought us together just choice. Just like him choosing to give up on us over one thing. If fate were real, then we would still be together. Fate is a fairy tale.

[Asker]

Well fate can be just as bad as it can be good, how do you know that the breakup wasn't fate and your fate is to eventually meet with someone else and get married and have kids, sounds like you've lost hope because of one guy, give yourself enough time to get over him and you'll maybe see things differently.

[Simslover92]

Perhaps...

[Asker]

I have hope that's how it's suppose to be 💯

[lyrem04]

I believe God has a path for everyone but at the end of the day, we still have free will. So depending on how we choose to live, things can go either way. But I also think there are certain things that, no matter what, if it’s God’s will, they’ll happen anyway.

[wolverin38]

Great answer

[Asker]

First person to say what I was looking for

[lyrem04]

The last part actually makes me think of a movie I watched a while ago forgot the name but it’s based on real life.. a couple gets into a car accident and the woman loses her memory.. She forgets everything, including her man. Dude is devastated…She goes back to the life she had before meeting him, he respect her wishes and so they lose contact… she goes on to date someone else, so does he, they live a whole different life… But then years later, they randomly runs into eachother again, and they fall in love all over again, have kids, and live happily ever after. So in this case it was God’s will for them to be together.

[Asker]

That's an interesting movie, can't say that's very realistic but I think I did hear a real life story of a dude who lost his memory and fell in love with his girlfriend again, or something like that

[lyrem04]

Found the movie it’s called the vow the real life couple is Kim and Krickitt Carpenter… kinda spoiled the whole story lol

[Asker]

Yea pretty much did spoil it but it's okay I've never been much into romances, now I know the ending without even knowing the movie existed, I'm hoping you aren't the type to spoil the movie right as the plot is happening because you seem like the type 😂

[lyrem04]

Nooo I’m not I promise 🥲 I don’t spoil movies and I don’t think I spoiled MUCH all I said is kind of in the overview… also that’s not rlly romance it’s mostly drama I don't know why it says it’s romance I found it depressing until it got happy

[Asker]

So they didn't make it romantic, they made it a drama? So that means that they just made it 10x more exaggerated then how it would be normally, possibly added some unnecessary scenes lol

[lyrem04]

Nahhh it was good I just it see it as a drama like sad 😭

[Asker]

I thought drama meant that it's just overly dramatic lol

[lyrem04]

Only when you mean a show is a drama but when drama it’s a theme then it’s sad/trauma kind of drama

[Asker]

Why has nobody shared this information with me in 24 years of my life 😂

[Chazmatazz269]

I have influence over my own life, but i do not control my “fate”. Sh*t happens that is completely outside of my control. In fact, the vast majority of goings-on are outside of my control. Managing how i perceive the world and people around me, as well as how i respond to them is pretty much the full extent of control that i have. I control myself. Any belief that i have the right or responsibility to control anyone or anything else is a defect of character; with limited extenuating exceptions for parents, guardians and caretakers.

[Ms_Facesitter]

In control of what you do. I don't know what this "fate" is. Some things do seem like it was meant to happen. Like when you meet someone and it really just clicks, it's like the match was made in heaven. Fated to meet. But I think that's just luck.

If someone under the influence is behind the wheel and crashes, killing a kid who couldn't dodge in time. It's that person's choice to drink and drive. Was that kid fated to just be run over? Destined to get killed like that? No.

Fate is supposed to be like supernatural, out of your control. Sure it's out of the kids control, but it's just wrong place wrong time, a consequence from a driver's bad decisions.

[Asker]

So you dont believe that if you were meant to die at a specific time and day, it will happen, most commonly known as inevitable, because if fate does exist, just cause it's a shitty fate doesn't mean it wasn't a fate, and do you really believe that just cause people have free will that it completely debunks the existence of fate? I think fate exists I just don't think it's destined, I believe that our actions do lead to our fate which is where the difference is and it's where it makes it a undestined fate, that kid at the end of the day chose to go down that path didn't he? I'm not saying it's a bad choice but it was surely an effective one.

[Asker]

Which one can also argue it might be destined considering that such a small innocent decision has the possibility to lead to your death, decide to go get your mail at your little box and terrible timing there's a shootout outside, you get caught in the cross fire, or shit, the bullet flies through your window lol

[Ms_Facesitter]

I'd say that... actions have consequences, instead of calling it fate.

[Asker]

If consequences exist then don't you think there must be a source to those consequences? Because there are many actions that don't have consequences, kinda how everything that happens is all falling into a certain plan

[Ms_Facesitter]

The source is the action.

[Ms_Facesitter]

Could you give me an example of an action you take that has no consequence? :o

[Asker]

Well not personally but I can give you several I've seen, I know people that have killed others, they are still free, there's many that cheat lie and steal and life only rewards them, what you are aware of when it comes to consequences are only the ones that had consequences, there's plenty that still await those consequences that you are clueless about because they have had no consequences, I hope you are right and there's consequences but in order for that to be true there has to be a devine justice, which I know as God, and the good ol famous judgement day, a day of inevitable judgement and where your fate is chosen, but I don't deny fate or the existence of it, my question to you is missy, if you believe in actions have consequences, who made or chose those consequences?

[Asker]

Because as far as I'm aware, consequences are given, they don't just form or happen and if they do just form and happen, who's to say they weren't destined to form and happen and for that to be true there has to be a mind in control of that

[Asker]

Because like we said, it's all choices, some entity is making all the final decisions and it's not us and our free will

[Ms_Facesitter]

In those cases I would call the consequence you're after justice. A person who did a crime doesn't have his "fate" sealed. If you don't get caught or the justice system fails the victim, they just get to go free. The result of the crime's action is the party they did it to ending up hurt. If the criminal covers up their tracks, they might get to live out their days being free. But they might live with constant paranoia, a lie eating away at them, who knows.

[Ms_Facesitter]

Say I'm a murderer. And I killed Chico304. What's next for me is living on a lie. "Did I hide everything?" "It's a big secret and I can't share it with anyone." "Perhaps... perhaps I should move that body."
I might even get interrogated by police officers, you know? There will come something of an action, whether it'll be visible on the surface or not.

[NoDecision]

If it's fate why worry about it one way or another, as you can't change fate. If it's not fate, then it is by choice.

[Asker]

Thanks for not answering the question 😂

[NoDecision]

I did, if it is sealed then you can't do anything about it. If it's not then what you do is by your own choices, as fate gives you no choice as it has been already decided by Mr. Fate.
https://youtu.be/snGyidMQgVw?si=XWlAR97VJZXvxQ1H

[midnightmoon05]

When I was younger, I thought I was in control 😂… well… life experience is a good teacher. Now I learned that… so much decisions can lead us to different places… yet so much is out of our control. Enjoy the journey.

[Asker]

Poor little smaller midnight, most likely learned the hard way, but I guess the results bloomed nicely, cause now you are the midnight I know 😂

[Berethor]

I don't really believe in fate, and any supernatural stuff in general, but there is circumstances.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Screw_Destiny

[Asker]

So you believe life has no purpose and it was all an accident? 🤔

[Berethor]

"The purpose of life is to end." - Agent Smith

[Asker]

That is the way of life, not the purpose, perhaps agent Smith mixed those two up on purpose trying to find purpose

[DryGermanGuy]

„In Casablanca I am master of my fate!“
- Cpt. Louis Renault, Casablanca

[Asker]

How he die? Suicide? Lol

[DryGermanGuy]

He doesn’t die. You should watch the movie.

[Asker]

Oh it's a movie lol 💀

[DryGermanGuy]

Where have you been the last few decades, hombre? 🤔

[Asker]

Well I've only been alive for about two decades, so when this movie came out, probably not produced in the balls yet 😂

[exitseven]

I had an uncle that used to say "Fate favors the one who digs the deepest foxhole." It is like that.

[DrPepper12]

Fate or destiny? BIG DIFFERENCE!!

[Miah06]

To an extent. Yeah

[Dargil]

Not completely, but I have inputs.

[Anonymous]

I think it's in between 🤔

[Emmytexrex]

Yh I believe so part of it

[Bunnybuny]

I doubt it

[Dongie]

Between.