Do you often fight against gender roles or do you tend to follow them? Why?

[Anonymous]

A gender role is a set of societal norms dictating behaviors, attitudes, and expectations considered acceptable for a person based on their gender. These roles are often based on stereotypes and can influence everything from domestic responsibilities and career choices to physical appearance and social conduct. While these roles vary across cultures, they are learned through a process called gender socialization, which starts at a young age and is reinforced by agents like parents, teachers, peers, and media.

Do you often fight against gender roles or do you tend to follow them? Why?

[HawkPerception]

I don't necessarily fight against them. I just go with what makes sense. Gender roles have been developed over millennia, so there's some logic behind them. I don't think we should just completely dump them in the garbage.

I believe in equality. Women should be allowed the same rights as men. I believe they have the right to independence, the right to work, and the right to vote (although with the majority of women being uninformed liberals, I'm starting to lean more towards them not having the right to vote. I'm joking... kind of).

People need to understand that gender roles are based on more primal times. Everyone had a clear understanding of their role in society back then. Men hunted and protected. Women were the nurturers and caregivers. They were very physically demanding times. Men are naturally more physically capable, and we did not have the technology that we have nowadays to accomplish the same tasks. Power tools to do any kind of construction or moving heavy things, guns which dwarf the efficiency of bows and arrows. Women were much more okay with the dynamic back then because they couldn't do the other stuff as efficiently as the men and it was painfully apparent.

Nowadays, life is extremely easy due to all the technology. We live in such convenient and comfortable times. We don't have to share bath water. We have grocery stores with every kind of food and necessities you can think of. We have phones which allow us to communicate with others. You can order food online. You can order maintenance for your living space online. We have fridges and freezers so we can store food much longer than before. We have laundry machines and dryers. Doing the laundry used to be a full-time job back in the past, having to handwash everything. We have cars that move way faster than horses. And you literally never have to leave your house these days if you work online.

It's created such an easy time for women to live independently and on their own. They do not need men nowadays, but I promise if there was none of the technology we have now, they'd turn a full 180 pretty quickly.

However, these are the times we live in, and we have to accept it. Women do NOT need men nowadays. But the strange thing is, they have equal rights and equal pay, and yet they still instinctively look for provider men, expecting them to pay the bill on dates, and many still expect men to pay for their standard of life. It's almost as if ancestral DNA that's been wired for millennia still has them looking for provider traits. It's why women generally (not always) look for men who make the same income as themselves or more. Rarely less.

My opinion on gender roles nowadays is that sure, you can have your equality. But that means you pay for yourself on dates. If we're both working, we're both pitching in for rent, helping with chores, cooking, taking care of kids, etc. I think both men and women should learn how to cook and be given chores from a young age to develop life skills so they can be independent and capable.

However, I think men should still be masculine and protective (because at the end of the day, we're still the physically stronger ones, regardless of whether or not we're as needed as we were in the past). And I think women should be feminine and nurturing. I think that these are the values we should try to instill in the future generation. I don't want to see a bunch of feminine guys swaying their hips when they walk and wearing dresses and crap. That's disturbing to witness. Leave that for the ladies. And I'd prefer ladies not try to be all tough and masculine and try to beat them in sports and lifting competitions, etc.

[rebelsunshine]

I don't "fight" against gender roles but I also don't conform to them.

I wrote the following for a question which was later deleted. I'll post it here since it relates to gender roles.

-----------------

I was 16 or 17. I didn't start puberty until I was 14 so I had a lot of catching up to do.

Puberty was very confusing for me. I knew from an early age I was more feminine than masculine psychologically. I was raised by my mother and my two older sisters and was socialized mostly around girls. I loved caring for animals, especially our dog Nelson. When my mom took us shopping for toys she pointed out the boys' toys but I didn't like them. She tried dressing me in boy's clothes as a toddler, but I didn't like them. I thought girl's clothes were prettier and my mom let me wear them at home. I shared playtime with my older sister and I played make-believe and peekabo with her. I played with all of my older sisters' dolls as well.

I watched a ballet on TV with my mother when I was five years old and told her I wanted to be a ballerina. She signed me up for ballet, dance, and gymnastics.

Only once when I was seven did my mom try to find a male role model for me. She chose my sisters' biological father, and he tried taking me on a camping trip for boys and girls and their parents. I absolutely hated the boys' camp and all the roughhousing and bullying I observed when I arrived. I knew I couldn't say there, and I cried and whined to my sister's dad until he relented and allowed me to transfer to the girls' camp. Thankfully my mom had packed me a set of girls' clothes for me and she'd given it to my sisters' dad.

In the summer before sixth grade my mom's job required us to move to a conservative part of the state. I wasn't allowed to go by "Michelle" any longer and had to use the name given to me at birth and identify as male. I cried and went over it, and my mom and my older sister hugged me when they saw me weeping.

Sixth grade was tough. A few of the girls in the school had been at the girls' camp with me, and one boy I met when I first arrived at the boy's camp recognized me. He kept his mouth shut, but the girls ultimately recognized me and word got out that I attended the camp as a girl. I was teased and harassed endlessly and eventually I was put on puberty blockers and taken off of them when I started high school.

I discovered that I'm bisexual, and my first sexual fantasies all involved girls. I found them disturbing because I had been friends since 6th grade with most of them. They were all gossiping about the upperclassmen at our school, including the star football player Derek S.

I joined the swim team and felt awkward showering in the men's room because I still had the body of an 11 year old. My sexual thoughts went verywhere and I developed a crush on a 16-year old boy who enjoyed teasing and bullying me. He'd heard I was gay and once he ran his finger down my naked back and I had a boner and pitched a tent in my speedos. He kept running his finger and girls were watching as well as boys. I froze and allowed it to happen.

I came to identify as a femboy, and one evening I met Derek S., the star football player at our school, while changing in the locker room. He got naked right before my eyes and the contrast between his body and mine aroused me. Even flaccid his dick was bigger than mine when it was hard and his balls were huge we measured once and they were twice as large and held four times the volume of mine!

I eventually approached the girl who was my closest friend at the school, and told her I found her attractive. She blushes as was caught totally off guard. I asked her if I could kiss her and she said yes, but just this one time. We kissed slowly and sensually and I felt electrified. I asked her to touch between my legs and guided her hand she and she gasped and smiled at me in disbelief. She told me she loved me as a friend but I was too feminine to be her boyfriend. I agreed.

After that I started dressing and going to school as a femboy. I had another encounter with the football player and he became the first boy I kissed. I told my friends about it the next day and they were happy for me. The football player eventually broke up with his girlfriend and he knew I desired him and found him sexy. He eventually confronted me alone in the locker room and I wound up giving him a BJ. He said I wasn't bad considering it was my first time giving one. He said he was straight but I looked girly enough for him, and asked me if I was willing to do everything for him that a girl would do sexually. I took a deep breath and nodded. He became my ongoing friends with benefits and I was frequently spotted at the same places he went.

The first time I stripped naked for him I had tucked and wrapped my penis and worn lingerie over the wrap so my penis wouldn't pop out. The lingerie was soaked with my precum and he smelled it. Then he brought my hand to his dick underneath his pants and I felt him grow. He eventually trained me how to pleasure him just as he wanted, and how to receive his dick as far down my throat as he could make it go. When he finally came ropes and ropes of cum shot from the tip of his dick onto my naked skin.

The doctors did bloodwork on me even though I wasn't on HRT, and when they reviewed the results with me they said they had bad news. I had a gene that creates 4x the level of aromatase, which is an enzyme that converts testosterone into estrogen. As a result, as my testosterone rose so did my estrogen level, which measured 145. My testosterone measured 210. They told me having such a high estrogen level could cause plates in my back to fuse and that would stop me from growing any taller. (I was 5'5" then and 5'7" now.)

They prescribed something for me and the next time I showed Derek he told me it was a medication that players on his football took clandestinely to lower their estrogen levels and increase their testosterone. He asked me for it and told me he'd reward me. I didn't want to take it because my hormones made me feel sexy and alive in the present moment. I also started taking various herbs and supplements to lower my testosterone without affecting my estrogen.

The next time my doctor reviewed my bloodwork he had a look on his face and told me my testosterone had dropped to 93. He asked If I had any symptoms and I told him I was starting to have chest pain and had started feeling two nodules under the skin of my nipples. He pressed on them and diagnosed me with gynecomastia.

"Gender affirming care" did not exist then the way it does today. If it did I probably would have changed my gender identity. But I was pleased being a femboy with both male and female attributes. I told my doctor that, and denied care for gyno.

My skin was changing and so were my hips. I looked more like a girl each passing day. I had always been lean and lanky but fat started depositing in a feminine distribution throughout my body.

I'm happy I was a femboy before the trend became popular at my school, and challenged gender conventions in my conservative town. I let more people know that there are men with feminine minds and women with masculine minds. Some choose gender transition and others don't. I accept that I have a male body but choose a feminine presentation for it.

And that's how I discovered myself.

[Screenwriter]

"Fight" wouldn't be the word I use. I'm comfortable wearing board shorts and T shirts as my daily wardrobe which isn't typical female dress for most people my age and was never so as long as I've lived, though I see more women in them than in my youth.

I've simply lived as I've felt comfortable. If I was forced due to a job, to wear certain clothes, I did so because I needed the money. I prefer not to have to fight because it's tiring.

So, on your on time in your own home, do as you please. When having to conform at a workplace due to rules that help you make money, pointless to fight. Or get another job.

Pick your battles.

[VioletHaze]

I think I follow them in most things. I used to be a tomboy, because I didn't get along with girls. Teenage girls can be quite mean. So, think I felt compelled to be more masculine to mark distance. Now, I feel quite comfortable in my femininity and have built good friendships to other women. I never feel constrained by gender roles. And I prefer a relationship thats kinda traditional.

[OlderAndWiser]

I follow traditional gender roles - with some modifications - without giving it any conscious thought. I think it represents a successful adaptation for our culture and I don't believe my individual experience is sufficient to overcome the accumulated, collective wisdom of all those who have shaped this process.

[EzraIsShy76028]

Definitely fighting against them.

Perhaps this may be an oversimplified viewpoint but I see zero need for gender roles other than "it's always been that way" and "it's tradition."

Some parts of it do make biological sense like that men are usually physically stronger than women but the decision that women must have long hair, wear makeup, and wear dresses; meanwhile men must have short hair, never wear makeup, and wear pants and never wear dresses, etc, are just purely arbitrary.

And a lot of the times gender roles just pigeonhole people into being a certain way without any freedom, like that women are supposed to be interested in cooking, fashion, makeup, etc; meanwhile men are supposed to be interested in guns, beer, cars, etc, and if you break out of those norms you're considered weird or inferior.

I personally see absolutely zero point to gender roles beyond just a biological sense. Understanding that men are generally physically stronger, women can give birth and have periods and men can't, etc, it's important to keep that in mind because physically we are different.

But I see zero point in: "Women are supposed to act like this, men are supposed to act like this, women are supposed to have these interests, men are supposed to have these interests, and if you break from that standard you're weird and inferior." Seems so pointless.

[RingOfFire]

"While these roles vary across cultures, they are learned through a process called gender socialization, which starts at a young age and is reinforced by agents like parents, teachers, peers, and media."

How can you define "gender roles" without even mentioning millions of years of evolution and nature that created distinct physiological differences between men and women which physically and mentally designed them for distinctly different roles in the family structure which is the building block of the societal structure?

To say that gender roles are exclusively the result of societal indoctrination is to completely ignore natural differences in human male and female design for specialization at various roles which are critical to human survival.

Nature came millions of years before any ephemeral society that exists today. So it seems to me that it is nature that determines gender roles, not society. It is natural behavior built in by millions of years of evolution and necessary for survival of the human race. And that explains why these same roles are so pervasive throughout human history and in so many cultures around the world.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I don't really think much about them. There's kinda just ones that are in my opinion unavoidable like having great posture, speaking confidently and clearly, eye contact and very carefully choosen handshake. Cultivating an air of almost ruthlessness balanced with respect.

But a lot of guys get lost in stuff like opening doors or how many text messages to send at once or how much money they make. What their social status is in any given group.

I dunno that stuff just never seemed like stuff a "man" should concern themself with to me. But it's subjective right?

[Lliam]

I am a man and I like women's feminine side. But I don't have traditional, conservative values. I've always been kind of a rebel and I don't care for rules. So I'm not strict about gender roles in my life and what other people do doesn't bother me.

I have worked with a lot of career women who were happily married and had kids.

My wife had a career before we met. I took care of myself when I was single. So we share household chores and gardening.
I'm glad she likes to cook because that's something I don't really enjoy doing.
She is self employed and still works part time even though I am now retired. She likes to stay busy.
So we both try to make each other happy and feel fulfilled. That's the only role we follow.

[RavVid]

There is a lot of evidence that boys and girls are different at birth. There is some gender socialization but not anywhere as much you might care to think.

The gender theory you are pushing is based on the assertion men and women should identical and it is "gender socialization" if they are not. where as baby girls are more interested in faces from birth whilst boys are more interested in mechanical things.

From an early age girls put effort into being pretty whilst boys don't care.

[WonderingManII]

What I'm about to say, is going to be unpopular, but it is based on personal experience. When I was working I was around a lot Women. They could change their views about me in a second, for the littlest reason, and I could watch an entire friendship that lasted for several years go down the drain for the littlest things. But the men I was around never acted like this with me. I'm not sure it is good for women to work an actual job because they are very emotional. But that has been my experience. Gender roles I think should be worked out between you and your husband or wife, not by societies standards.

[melssvdv]

No because no matter how hard we women try, we cannot excel over men especially in a physical matter. Especially during our menses. We need to just give up. We cannot fights against biology so the only way is acceptance.

Just because men are better than us women does not mean we are useless. Ditch this nonsense called feminism/capitalism/communism/zionism, etc. and you will be happy.

[midnightmoon05]

I like being a woman, mom, daughter, etc… I like men with great strengths, men who protect us. I don’t like when women fight with men… it upsets me. We really should learn to love each other… we only live here for a short time… 60-80 years?

[RandomGirl42]

I live in a very small rural area where gender roles still strongly exist but not out of stereotyped beliefs. More out of practicality. I mean a 6 month pregnant woman just isn't going to have as easy of a time out there running a chainsaw in the middle of Jan as a man is.

[Anonymous]

Depends on the role. I think i do for the most part. I am my father's son. Do attract a lot of women? No. But I attract the right ones. Do I have everyone's (male and females) respect? No. But I have the right ones. Does everyone like me? No. But right ones, the ones who matter to me do.

Like it or not in today's world of tremendous social change there are still very much gender roles. You don't have to like them, you don't even have to follow them. But if you choose not to you WILL pay a price for it. As you will anytime you buck the system in anything. Sorry, that's just the way it is.

[Gwendoline]

What like getting a job as a sewer worker?

I think most gender roles are more to do with desire. Like if you have a 9 year old girl who wants to play with barbie and dress like Elsa are you going to say no and give her a GI Joe and ironman costume?

[melanieeeB]

I honestly don't understand the whole gender role stuff.. like either you're a woman or a man and that's about it.
You can be who you want as a person and I don't think that has something to do with your gender. If you like cars as a girl, then okay. What's the problem? I don't get the whole bullshit and stay away from people who look like they give a shit about some gender stuff.

[Summeroflove]

I live my life like a American I live the life I choose to live and seek the things I seek in a partner. Not everyone wants the same thing… As long as someone’s happy that’s what matters.

I don’t like when someone tries to control someone else especially people who aren’t happy with their own lives and want to make everyone’s as miserable as they are.

[Berethor]

I'm far from being the most masculine man on earth but I follow the gender roles the best as I can as I don't want people to think that I am gay and it natural for men to act like men.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Camp_Gay

[jtg13]

Fun question. Being a single dad to a daughter, most of my adult life I've played different roles. I can't say I've played into any roles society taught me to be I've step into roles I feel I needed to be and was good at. I'd only really fight when someone placed me in a box. Yes and... Is where I fall under.

[Bitter_Sweet94]

I don’t blindly follow gender roles, but I also don’t fight them just to prove a point.

I choose what feels right for me.

If something aligns with my values, I’ll do it.

If it doesn’t, I won’t.

Simple as that.

[Northstar84]

I don’t appreciate being put in a box with gender stereotypes myself, I shouldn’t have to be a construction worker because it’s “masculine” nor should a woman have to be a stay at home mom because it’s “feminine” I hate that we live in a world full of people who dictate how your lives should be lived based on what type of reproductive organs we possess.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Well, considering I’m 32 working food service with two cats, no husband, no children, and living with my mom with no desire to have sex with anyone I’d say my existence alone breaks a lot of gender roles lol

[LuciusTheOdd]

I don’t care about gender roles at all, I’m not letting society make my decisions for me if I make a decision on something thing it’s because I personally think it’s the best option.

[AviatorTom]

Sometimes I follow them, sometimes I fight them. It depends on the situation and what feels right

[slatyb]

I ignore them and do as I please. I dress in typical male attire, but that's about it. I'm not homosocial -- I don't hang with guys in sports bars.

[douride2]

I grew up with5 brothers. I haven't really followed what most people call gender roles for almost all my life.

[SolitarySolace]

Men are forced to follow their gender roles while women have been conditioned for years to ignore theirs. 🤷🏻‍♂️

[beenherebefore]

I usually tend to follow them just because is what makes sense to me.

[genericname85]

i understand that gender roles and stereotypes exist for a reason. i don't fight them. they have nothing to do with me really.

[Snakeyes7]

I tend to follow them, I find it more fulfilling that way and it's just who I am. I've been like that long before I had any concept of societal expectations.

[FunkyMonkee]

Sometimes. A lot of people don't seem to like it if I wear a skirt.

[goaded]

I didn't fight them, I just stayed home and looked after the children.

[JRenegade]

Both genders tend to be happier i find when they ignore society and follow those gender roles

[jahaims]

It seems like emotionally healthy people tend to follow them.

[Anonymous]

I just live my life and I don't worry about gender nonsense.

[whiskeyontherocks]

Never really cared to even discuss gender roles so don’t now don’t care.

[Anonymous]

God gave males and females specific roles to follow, and for good reasons. Some "roles" can be followed by either sex, while others are intended for one specific sex.

[Anonymous]

most of the people who obsess over gender roles can't afford to have those gender roles.

[Anonymous]

I do my best to wear women's panties all the time. They're so much more comfortable than men's!

[Anonymous]

I tend to follow them but as a strong proponent of freedom, I support people going against the grain.

[Anonymous]

I don't support patriarchy and so called "gender roles", those are just a social construct.

[RFC1872]

We follow them strictly in our home. How else would dinner get cooked around this place?

[Jennz6]

Let people do whatever they want

[Anonymous]

Aunt zemma does it ruling over her slave sons force them to the cotton field

[Opinion Owner]

aunt jemima is a slave queen indeed

[TonyMetal___86]

I do what i like to do...

[beefcakebradybatson]

I more fight race "roles."

[Anonymous]

I don't because they work.

[MikeTheBartender]

Ummm no

[Deserter3]

I do what I want