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How to Avoid a Stupid Man: Women Must Know the Meaning of Relationship
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Relationship is not what most people have with each other. You already know this is true. Our images prevent us from becoming one with each other and are the source of great internal and external pain. We have attempted to annihilate each other because we can't seem to let go of our various images. All political systems and rules of government are nothing more than images, a projection of thought produced from the minds of men. Some may appear to work better than others, but they are still images nonetheless. Even so, we are willing to suffer great pain or inflict great pain on others to protect or project them.
The chaos going on inside many women is only a reflection of their external world. When you live in a society hell bent on competing for everything, that same ‘spirit of competition' is bound to show up in every aspect of one's life. Thus, some women will swim like a teeming school of piranhas around one man looking for Mr. Right, even if he belongs to her best friend.
Yes, more and more women are abandoning their intuition about men and are settling for anything. The competition out there is tough, and they haven't the time to wait because their biological clock is ticking. They want a little happiness before they die. Foolish woman! Don't you know that men know this too? Don't be stuck on stupid! I've said it once, and I'll say it again: You need relationship. You don't need a man.
Relationship by definition means you are one with the thing you are connected to. Therefore, pure relationship means you are connected to a man but that connection initially has nothing to do with how you feel about him. Your emotional feelings of attachment to someone should always be a by-product of your relationship and your recognition of them through awareness. When both people have a deep awareness of each other and an awareness that they are birthed from the same Source, something happens on the inside of them and also on the outside of them. There is a space, a pause of silence, and a knowing that the two of you have touched each other, not physically, but spiritually. We often describe these moments as a pause in the space-time continuum. Others simply say: “Time stood still.” No one will be able to tell you what this experience feels like. And I'm sure it feels different for everyone. That's the reason it's so hard to describe to someone else. No words can describe what can't be described. This knowing must be internally felt. The only thing you need to know is it will be a unique experience for the both of you.
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You probably have never experienced the love that flows out of awareness. If you have never been self-aware how could you possibly be truly aware of another individual? Your soul mate is out there but you won't' recognize him until you become aware of who you are and give up the false belief that you need a man. You are only chasing after the image of something you think will heal you or make you whole.
But you can't have relationship with an image. In fact, it's not a stretch to say this: You can't truly have a relationship with anybody until you stop your image making. People naturally resist what other people try to turn them into. If nothing more, a teenager should have taught you this by now. When a teenager reaches a certain stage of their life they attempt to cast off the image the parent gave them, to redefine themselves and establish their own identity.
Parents often think they lose relationship with the child, but the truth of the matter is they never really had a pure relationship with their child. They simply were building an image of what they thought the child should be, either a model after themselves, or a slightly improved one. Parents do this out of what they perceive is their love for the child. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying parents don't love their children. They do. But, only as far as their image making will allow them. When the child struggles for autonomy and fights against the image, which is being forced on him by his parents, the parents, go haywire. They want the child to be tested for drugs, taken to a shrink, or medicated because he's not acting like he's supposed to. Parents often think they have a good relationship with their child when nothing is further from the truth.
This fact can be seen by the child's refusal to talk to their parents about the most important issues in their life. The child doesn't come to them for two primary reasons: The child doesn't want to disappoint his parents because he can't live up to the image, and secondly, the child doesn't want to be judged for choosing to be himself. When it all comes down to it, an image-maker wants to control the image. But, people at their very core are not images and if you try to control them by forcing an image on them, they will rebel. They just shut down and move elsewhere where they will be accepted as they are. From this example, you can see that the child is not rebelling against his parents, but against the image his parents are trying to force upon him.
All of us have been through this state of rebellion and some of us are still rebelling against certain things even to this day. Rebellion and non-conformity aren't necessarily bad. You did it, I did it, and everybody else does it, often several times throughout the course of our lives. It's hell trying to live up to the image and expectations of other people.
I want to drive home the point: True love lies outside any act of the object of love (the person receiving love) and the lover (the giver of love). Thus, when you truly love and have relationship with someone, that love must be independent of anything the person does or doesn't do for you. I know this is a paradox. It's not how we think a relationship is supposed to be. But it is true nonetheless. When love is based upon mutual awareness and respect of the giver of love and the receiver of love, the two can flow in and out of each role in a reciprocal fashion and sustain their cohesiveness together. This can only happen when each person knows they are respected for their unique being and are not in any way being forced to love the other person.
Thus, when a man does not respond in the way you want or think he should, that's okay. He is exercising his autonomy; independent of the image you have of him. Believe me ladies; you really want this kind of man in your life. You want a man who knows how to love you and still remain true to own his identity. A soul mate will always choose to be who he is. And he will never allow himself to be hurt by what you think about him because he knows himself. He doesn't see himself as an image, so you can't build him up or tear him down. He knows that he can exist and be happy apart from having you in his life. I know this doesn't make you feel good. You want security and a feeling that you are needed. But you are still looking outside yourself for that which can only come from within. If you don't learn to change your need to a want, you are doomed to attract the wrong man because your thoughts of needing will produce desperation, and desperation will cause you not to wait for your soul mate.
Wanting a man in your life is a wonderful choice you can make. Needing a man in your life is not. Women often abandon their own intuition because they think they need a man. They violate the law of the red flag.
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