I cheated on my boyfriend when drunk..how can I ease the pain?

If he's still with you, then I'm amazed.

Something you should come to understand - your boyfriend's emotions are his own business, just like your emotions are your own business. It's not your job to adjust how he feels at any time.

His reactions to you are his responsibility. If you cheat on him, and he stays with you, then his emotional upset is something HE needs to fix, not you.

If you're feeling guilty, then that's a good thing. It's the pain of self-disappointment that makes us moral people.

Just be honest with him about how you feel, about how surprised you are with your own actions, and you best figure out a way to prevent such traumatic mistakes from re-occurring.

If you allowed yourself to get drunk, and then you allowed yourself to cheat, then you need to do some deep soul seeking to figure out what went wrong, and why.

Feeling embarrassed, or vulnerable, or what ever, is your responsibility, and it's up to you to fix it. Don't try burdening him with the pain you've caused yourself, because it's not his responsibility.

Honesty, and transparency, are the only things that will help build back his trust. Transparency means he knows everything you're doing, when, where, with whom, and why. When you grant him full access to you life, you're telling him "See? I am willing to become vulnerable so that you will trust me again."

This doesn't mean he dictates what you do, it just means he's allowed to know exactly what you're doing, at all times.

Perhaps someone else in this forum will have some insight from their experience.

Good luck,

~ Robby

If you have an alcohol problem, go to treatment. But make sure YOU want to get better. Actions speak louder than words - but they have to be real.

The best thing is to leave him alone for a little while. You've done everything you can right now by apologizing and admitting your mistake. Being drunk is not a good excuse to cheat, so I imagine he's pretty hurt. Next time don't surround yourself with guys who don't respect your relationship and don't put yourself in the situations to do something stupid while drunk.

I don't think there's anything else you can say to make him feel better. He's probably pretty p*ssed off more than worrying if it was his fault you cheated.