Ghosting. It’s one of the worst dating trends I’ve encountered so far. Getting rejected blows, but simply wondering if your date disappeared after your wonderful date is absolutely frustrating. I’ve been completely worn out with the dating process for a while now, so after numerous ghosting encounters, I decided to flip the tables to figure out why guys ghost me after Tinder dates by doing the same to them. I set up three Tinder dates, and here’s what I learned:
Dating numerous people is hard
I’ve never dated more than one person at a time, but I decided to give it a whirl. What I learned was dating numerous people at the same time is hard. Trying to find time to schedule three dates per week is tough, plus it cuts out from my time with my girlfriends. This makes me wonder, why would anyone want to cheat?
The constant texting can get annoying
I’ve always wished guys would text me more often, but when I had numerous guys texting me all day, my phone wouldn’t stop blowing up! It’s hard to focus on work when my cell is constantly dinging. I’m now realizing that guys might actually be busy, so I shouldn’t worry when I don’t hear from them all day!
They don’t take a hint
This is the main factor that made me realize why guys ghost. You see, if you are dating numerous people at the same time, you will realize you like one more than the other. Since it’s casual dating and we met on Tinder, sending a “let’s just be friends” text is way too early on in the game and assuming the relationship is somewhere that it’s NOT - so that leads to plan B. Trying to limit the texting, being busy when they ask me out, or hoping the conversation slowly fades never worked. In fact, it made the guys more into me because I was hard to get. After a few weeks of “being busy” via text, I decided to stop responding. Sure, it may seem rude, but I didn’t know what else to do.
Overall, I realized though ghosting may seem harsh and rude to the other person involved, if the dating situation is casual and he’s not taking a hint, ghosting is a last resort to save your sanity. Selfish, yes. But I will no longer have my feelings hurt when a guy from a first date doesn’t call me back. He wasn’t that into me, and someone else will be.