I'm the teen romance movie bitch and that's okay

I'm the teen romance movie bitch and that's okay

Okay. Maybe she wasn't a bitch the entire movie. But we all still hated her for a minute when she picked her awful boyfriend over Edward, right? Yeah, that type of girl is who I'm talking about here.

Today, I did something I never thought I'd do. I became someone I never thought I'd become.

I'm the bitch in the teen romance movie.

You know the one; she leads on our beloved protagonist, then breaks up with him before their first date. She's leaving him for some stupid boy who'll never love her back, or some douchebag who doesn't deserve her. But luckily, our hero finds a girl who's just as nerdy and quirky as him, and the bitch is left to watch nerdy girl and the protagonist ride of into the sunset toward a happy suburban life and 2.5 kids.

Yeah. I'm that bitch.

On February 13th, I had the joy of being asked out by someone who could quite possibly be the perfect guy- he's 6'2", thin but strong, blue eyes, brown hair, perfectly pale, the works- and I, of course, accepted. He was a far cry from my ex-boyfriend- short, dark hair, dark eyes, nothing special- and he was way more in my league. I was sitting pretty. Finally, a guy who met my standards. He wouldn't mess me up like my ex did. I had a date for Valentine's day, and I was happy. For about two hours.

Well, it was more like an hour and twenty minutes. But for some reason, my ex (whom I hadn't really talked to since our breakup) texted me. Now see, this just so happened to be at the same time Mr. Perfect texted me. But when I looked at my phone, it became clear to me- I wanted to text my ex first.

I'm not over him.

Now that took a while to realize. I talked to Mr. Perfect for another day, and then half an hour before our date was scheduled, I told him I'd had a really bad cold settle in (which, I mean, is half true; I do feel sick- but I doubt it's due to a virus). And when he asks to reschedule, I've got my next couple of weekends booked. I'll hit him with a good old "we'll see", and hopefully he'll get the hint.

Major bitch move, right? I don't think so.

Say I had gone on a date with this boy. What then? The only reason I'd be going on a date with him would be to show myself "hey!!! you're completely over your ex!!!!" which is bad for both of us, because a.) I'm not, and b.) I wouldn't be dating him because I genuinely want to get to know him. Either way, it would all be for me. Is it any more fair for me to lead this boy on, let him think he has a chance with me by going on a date with him, only for him to end up with someone who's hooked on their ex? Is it fair to let him fall in love with me while I love someone else for the sake of "not hurting his feelings"? If you think about it, isn't it much less of a bitch move to leave now then to drag him along?

Isn't that teen romance movie bitch just as much a protagonist as any other character? Look at it from a different perspective- if the teen bitch never let our hero go, he'd never be with his nerdy true love. In a way, she's just advancing the storyline; sure, maybe he's hurt for a second, but it allows him to know what real love is when he's with nerdy girl. She's not the villain; it'd be far more villainous of her to play him. Instead, she lets him down. She knows she's not right for him. She knows he doesn't deserve to be with a girl who's in love with someone else. And maybe that someone else is a douchebag jock, but the heart wants what it wants, and that's okay. She has every right to let the hero down.

I know, I know- I'm probably just rationalizing due to internalized guilt, blah blah blah. But I feel a new connection to this archetypal bitch I see on TV. She's not out to hurt anyone, she's just hurt herself. It's okay to not be ready to date someone. It's okay to want to be alone. It's okay to want your ex back. And it's especially okay to avoid hurting others by staying true to yourself.

As I sit here, it's the exact time my date should be beginning, and I'm at peace. I'll be spending Valentine's day with my mom, no boys, and that's what I want for myself right now. For a while, the focus is going to be on me and me alone. And there's nothing wrong with that.

So yeah, I'm that bitch from the teen romance movies. And for God's sake, that is completely okay.

xx


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What Guys Said 7

  • Ok, so let me get this straight: You were offered a Ferrari, and you took the Ford? Really?
    It's your life, you do what you gotta do, but the fact that you're writing this is because you're not o with your decision, that's why you're trying to convince yourself and others that being a "TV bitch" is ok.
    I'm not anyone to say if you made the right decision or not, but since you're so considerate with Mr. Perfect (notice the sarcasm), don't ever go back to him, don't ever ask him out when everything goes to shit with your ex, 'cause if you do, then you will be acting like a REAL bitch.

    Good luck with your decision, I wish no wrong to anyone, but in my honest opinion you made a HUGE mistake.

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  • Sloots gon sloot, I'm not even rustled, bby.

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  • guys who are stupid enough to fall for your schemes... they are losers who deserve the heartache... It's perfectly okay to be a bitch, I could not agree with you more. Just don't be offended at me for calling you a bitch

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  • being a bitch is not ok. and whoever told you it was, is probably a bitch.

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    • It's not necessarily that I'm being a bitch, but more that the societal view of the things I've done would paint me as a bitch. I'm basically playing devil's advocate.

  • Are you one of those girls who thinks they are actually a princess and expects to be treated as such?

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  • You were given the world and you turned away and wanted one of the worst things ever. You aren't with this guy because it didn't work last time you got a 6'2 strong guy who is everything every other girl wants but you didn't want it and instead chose a loser. You essentially were given the starting quarterback and you decided you'd rather have the nerd who was at home jerking off. It makes me sad that you would do that, this guy isn't going to get bothered by it he's going to find a better girl and you're going to regret that you didn't get the best you'll ever have.

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    • He probably would, and that's good for him. I'm glad. But dating this "perfect guy" wouldn't improve my life. Why should I date the star quarterback if I can't love him? He may not realize it now, but he has no business with me. Nobody deserves to be with someone who's hooked on someone else. And if that makes me a bitch, fine.

    • I understand what you're going through the first girl I ever loved I felt like I'd never get over her but once I met another girl I really liked it was as if that first girl ever happened it was like it was all new again :)

  • I love your attempted justifications and rationalizations. The denial part is superb too. and I need to borrow some of that intended narcissism.
    so you palmed off two guys... lol.. whoopie
    good article.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I agree with the don't lead a guy on. That's just cruel to do to anyone. I've been in that situation like 3 years ago. Where your still in love with an ex. Me and that guy had been like off and on for 2yrs. After 2 years I was through with his stupid crap. I hoped he would have changed or something but he didn't. Found a new guy who is so much better than he was. Anyways I would have just told the guy you had a date about the whole situation. That you still had some feelings for your ex boyfriend. In that case the guy could have decided if He wanted to just walk away from that or still except that he might not have a chance. It's always best to tell people the straight up truth. Then let them decide what to do with that knowledge.

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  • The heart wants what is wants! :')

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