Who is the oldest person you know in PERSON who has never had a girlfriend/boyfriend?

My brother is 35 and he's never had a girlfriend, date or even sex/kiss with a girl. He's very lonely and complains about it. I feel bad for him too. It's not his fault, because he asks girls out, they just reject him every time. He attempted suicide at age 23 and barely survived. I just feel bad for him, since he's so lonely.

He's the oldest person I know who has never dated.

  • 13-17
    16% (3)0% (0)10% (3)Vote
  • 18-24
    42% (8)18% (2)33% (10)Vote
  • 25-29
    5% (1)18% (2)10% (3)Vote
  • 30-35
    11% (2)18% (2)13% (4)Vote
  • 36-44
    5% (1)18% (2)10% (3)Vote
  • 45 and older
    21% (4)28% (3)24% (7)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • My brother is 18

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    • Just imagine him being 35 and in the same boat.

Most Helpful Guy

  • My aunt died at the age of 89 having never dated, kissed, or had sex with a man. She lamented her loneliness sometimes, but was at peace with it. My brother's friend had osteogenesis imperfecta, which rendered her disfigured. She died in her late 50s a dateless, kissless, virgin. She was very sad. She once said she'd rather have someone to love than the ability to walk.

    My friend since high school is just a little younger than I. He too is a dateless, kissless virgin. He has FAS. He had a crush on my wife, who was very kind to him. At times he is very depressed.

    Many of my brother's friends died virgins (many of them died in their 30s and 40s). They had various disabilities. Some were at peace with their situations, others were profoundly sad.

    This is why it irritates me when I hear people advise "Just get over it" to people in such a situation. If it were that easy, we all would "just get over it," but it's not so simple. Furthermore, it's one thing to go through a dry spell, but as my friend has told me, it gets worse with time, not better. Therefore it's understandable that as one year becomes five years, as five years becomes a decade, as a decade becomes several decades, these people often become progressively depressed, and yet I've seen on the internet many people simply chant the "no one is entitled to sex" mantra as if that's any solution (and everyone my brother and I know personally already knew they weren't entitled to sex). Not only is this in no way a solution, it's actually kind of insulting to them since they already knew that.

    And yet I believe in most circumstances, people who have difficulty finding affection can change that (and telling them "no one is entitled to sex" or "well, get with someone you don't find attractive" are not solutions in any way).

    Tell me about your brother, asker. Why do you feel he is a 30 something year old virgin? Why did he attempt suicide at the age of 23? Is he diagnosed with clinical depression?

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    • Thank you for MHO, but it might be a bit premature. ;)

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    • @detlef
      Thanks. She died about a year and a half ago. Her story was very sad. Some people would take solace that perhaps she reached paradise in the afterlife, but I don't believe in an afterlife. Even if she did reach paradise, I believe her first words to her Maker might be something like, "Why did I suffer so much to get here?"

    • @moviedude714
      The fact that women are generally not the initiators doesn't preclude them from being alone. Many women are simply passed up.

What Girls Said 7

  • My dads brother (I don't consider him an uncle, I have nothing to do with the people on my dads side of the family anymore) is in his forties and he is still a virgin. He has never had a girlfriend or moved out of his parents place.

    I'm the second oldest though. No one else I know is one still. Not that I know of anyway. I am 29 and never had a boyfriend or anything. I can see myself getting old and still being one. I'm basically there already.

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    • Just out of curiosity: Why haven't you had one?

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    • The thing is, I know my own experiences. I hate when people act like my experiences didn't happen. I know exactly what has happened in my life. I've been called ugly by even family members. My mother and sister tell me all the time that I am. I've lived in different cities, and I've heard the same thing. I hate showing my picture. Feel free not to believe me, but I know my own experiences in life. I shouldn't have to prove myself to someone.

    • I would love to see a picture. It's just hard for me to believe 100 percent of the population thinks you're ugly.

  • my uncle, (70 something) I don't know if he ever dated, but he didn't really seem like the type. he never married and he didn't seem to have too many friends. sorry to hear about your brother that's really terrible, but he's not alone, so try to help him hold out until things turn around for him.

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  • My mom's best friend is 60 and has never had a success relationship, marriage or kids or anything.

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  • I have a lot of friends and acquaintances that have never had partner's and have never had sex. I think most have stolen kisses though, even if it's just a quick peck.
    18-24

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  • My cousin is 30 and she's never been in a relationship. I know it's hard for her though because she really wants to have a family and we'll have kids but I don't know why no guy has courted her

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    • Really? She's never had a boyfriend?

    • @moviedude714 Yeah she hasn't. I don't understand it though... She's very pretty and has an amazing personality.

    • Ya like i said before in other comments, whenever I hear of a person that is 25+, or 30+ years of age and never had a relationship, I always find it more shocking to hear of a woman like that, because I like to feel its easier for women to get into a relationship since guys are still expected to be the initiators

  • i know of a guy through one of my friends social circle, a guy who is 32 and never had a girlfriend

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    • It's so pitiful.

    • ya it sure is, unfortuneately

  • My uncle is 45 and has never had a girlfriend as he had a bad upbringing so I guess he doesn't trust women as the way his mum and stepmum treated him when he was growing up.

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What Guys Said 7

  • i have no doubt there are probably more men out there who are 25+, or 30+ years of age who are still a virgin and never been in a relationship with the oppossite sex before, i believe in the quote that sperm is cheap, eggs are expensive

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  • My aunt is about 57 and, to my knowledge, she's never been in a relationship or experienced intimacy. I'm not sure if it's something she even wants, though.

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  • the world is not a fair place.

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  • i know one guy who is 45 and never had a girlfriend, still a virgin, he told me he gave up over 20 years ago

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  • i know of one guy who is 36 and a virgin, never had a girlfriend

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  • very surprised by hearing women that have been single this long!, mainly because they don't have to make the first move and do the approaching

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  • I think it was posted on the news either a year ago or almost a year ago, a man making headlines in the news about being a 58 year old virgin, and I worked with a dating coach a year ago, they told me they once worked with a man that was 42 and never had a girlfriend, still a virgin, he was an Asian guy from Vietnam

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    • just type in 58 year old virgin, and there will be some news articles about it

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