Why do unattractive guys keep going for super hot girls but get all victim when they're rejected?

One of my friends he's not particularly unattractive but he's very, very average and he always seems to go for extremely attractive girls and its fine to go for a girl that you find attractive but if the girl you find attractive is also attractive to 100s and 1000s of other guys and they're lining up for her too, then there's a problem. I think he has this nerd to hot girl fantasy, think Shia and Megan Fox transformers or Penny and Leonard, big bang. He thinks some hot girl is going to walk into his life and think it's sexy that he plays Xbox all day and has watched every star wars episode a thousand times and that's fine but when it doesn't work out that way, he comes crying to me that he can't find love and yet he keeps chasing these girls ! And they either use him or reject him. He's my friend I'll be there for him but it's getting ridiculous with the moaning and whining about how he can't find love and yet he's only looking for superficial things. Why do guys do this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • superficial things? attraction is not superficial. you never know. im pretty average maybe a bit above, and I've landed a couple of 10s. if you told me that i was only worth a 5 so i should only date 5s i would say "ok so im not going to date at all." the only reason he would get upset over it is if he believes that he is worth that.

    and why wouldn't he. society preaches that you should find someone who loves you for you. he hasn't realized you have to completely change yourself to be attractive to women. and he hasn't realized that love isn't all about some random connection that you'll finally meet this person who loves you for you. thats what disney and society preaches so thats what most people believe. he hasn't realized what it is women value yet.

    but even then. there are still hot girls that play xbox all day.

    but its not a male only thing. many, many western women have a HUGELY inflated sense of self worth. so many looking for "prince charming". to the extent that a woman who is a 5 gets with a 9 in her 20s then thinks he's below her then they end up losing value quickly 35 onward having turned down many great men because they thought they were worth more only to have to settle for a 4 or 6 when their biological clock starts exploding. this is quite a common thing. mmm. well at least it isn't *uncommon*.

    my question to you is why do you think this is a male trait?

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    • oh. and everyone victimizes themselves. literally everyone is "oppressed". women have a significant advantage in dating. but even then you'll hear them bitching about no "good guys" hitting on them. i just read a question about a girl who was only interested in 4 out of 250 guys at her school, admitted she had guys that liked her and asked if she would "ever have a boyfriend."

Most Helpful Girl

  • Because he's shallow. That's his fault for making poor choices and being shallow.

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What Guys Said 20

  • Can happen both ways (to both genders) -- typically it's a combo of these things, though maybe slightly more of a male problem (perhaps since males tend to be so visually-centric in terms of their attractions):

    1) Failing to properly assess our own sex appeal.

    2) Some romantic idea that simply caring a lot for a girl and treating her nicely will make us attractive to them.

    3) Virginity. When guys are virgins, instead of lowering their standards they tend to raise them, since their sexual experience is limited to fantasies and imagination.

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  • below average dude sets sights too high, of course the hot girl rejects him, then he complains "nice guys finish last" boo whoo

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  • its pretty simple... and you can keep this for life!

    "Everyone wants what they can't have"

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  • Wow girl, you are shallow as hell and as arrogant as hell too. I'm so glad I've turned girls like you down, you are a jerk.

    Take an hourglass, turn it upside down and think about what your best qualities are whether they define you as a person and whether or not you will still have those qualities when you are pushing 40 years old. Write them down and meditate on them.

    I seriously doubt you will be able to do this, you probably can't stay still, silent and alone in your own head that long.

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    • What are you talking about? What exactly makes me "shallow" "arrogant" and "a jerk"?

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    • I assume you like him, just not his moaning and complaining to you about his rejection. I think you should appeal to his interests and speak to him in a very nice and almost flirtatious way. Move in really close to him slowly, and how you want to do it next is up to you just make slow advancements, like put your hand on his thigh while your other hand is around the back of his neck, look him in the eyes and tell him what you think.

    • Haha Ah yes dead in the eyes and whisper to him, ever so softly "get a fucking grip, these girls are out of your league" thanks man I'll try that
      Might get a little awkward with the thigh touching and the neck stuff but that's the best way. I've tried so many nice ways to say it, doesn't register.

  • He probably believes the cliche that girls only care about personality.

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  • Women do this to. He's going for who he's attracted to, possibly at his age it all physical right now. He doesn't want to settle. It may change as he gets older.

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  • That's kind of a shitty thing to say about your friend. I think there is nothing wrong with him pursuing who he is attracted to. And to call it superficial... it's not really like that. If that is all you are attracted to, then you can't change that.

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  • I think because either his ego is sky high or he just doesn't know any better. He'll learn. However, not all guys do this. We usually stay in our league (s).

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  • lmao.

    the hotter they are the more shallow they often become because everyone gives them inner beauty of love and tolerance lol

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  • They aren't going for guys they don't find attractive. Why should he go for a girl he doesn't find attractive?

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    • Like I said its ok to be attracted to someone but if you're just another number among a sea of other men that find that girl attractive too and vying for her attention there's going to be problems there. My problem isn't necessarily about who he finds attractive rather the moaning about it later on after the rejection.

  • He's ambitious. Whether he is overly so depends on if he can get results, which he hasn't so far.

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  • I did that as a teenager. I grew out of it with age. Lowers my standards a bit and improved myself a lot and now I'm in okay shape.

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  • He should approach girls based on personality more...

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  • Why do unattractive GIRLS keep going for super hot GUYS but get all victim when they're rejected?

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  • not really has more to do with money then looks tell him he needs to man up and get his shit together then he can get a dime every week

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    • Haha he needs some lads to tell him that. I could never

  • Any girl that would reject you is fuckin piece of shit anyway

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  • Why doesn't he work on himself?

    Turn off the video games and be more social...

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  • Probably because practically all girls say looks don't matter so they figure they might as well go for it and then they get rejected for being unattractive.

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  • http://imgur.com/QUYpquA curious if your opinion of what average is

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  • They're shallow.

    But I do see a lot of guys who I wouldn't exactly consider studly looking have insanely hot girlfriends so not all are probably bitter and some must be pretty damn charming.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Like you said, he lives in a fantasy. He probably thinks he's more attractive or more interesting than he actually is.

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  • he better focus on his career and making money... girls go after status and money

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  • One day he will realise

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  • haha, everyone wants why they can't get. geez, I wouldn't go that extreme.

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  • Part of being friends is putting up with their most annoying habits! Maybe try interducing him to more girls who are likely to be interested in him.

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