I don't understand it, don't women go out to have a good time and meet new people? On a weekend I'll approach women to strike up a conversation and they'll behave oddly like bratty or in some way childish... is this normal for women to behave like that? At first i thought i smelt kinda bad or something so I double checked and walked over to a group of men in the venue to join group conversation and got a good response from the guys when we were all exchanging jokes together and everything went well.
So how would I know if a women is interested in these venues? what signs should I look for? Its not like they walk around the club with a frigging radar.
Because seldom do they experience an adverse consequence when they engage in such behaviour. I learned early that it was a waste of time to approach females who were in groups, especially in nightclubs and bars. Where I live, the young females competed with the group to see who could devliver the most bitchy, or vicious, putdown to males who approached them. Investing time, money and effort in the pursuit of female company is a fool's errand.
To find out if a girl wants to talk to you, generally she'll give you eye contact. Rarely she'll go up to you yourself lol, but it can happen (if you're attractive 😅). No eye contact and she's probably not interested.
As for myself, I go out to dance with my friends. I don't mind talking to guys however, majority of the time I find myself being grabbed by guys, sometimes they pull me away from my friends, grind on me when I don't wanna dance with them. Etc. Etc. Easiest way to get rid of them is be mean. That's just how it is unfortunately.
women dont always go out to meet guys. a lot of times the attitude comes from assuming (rightfully or incorrectly) that the guy who approaches them is a thirsty guy who just wants sex. also keep in mind that not everyone knows how to turn down someone gracefully. some women think if they dont want to talk to a guy then they need to be standoffish and distant so he will get the hint and stop talking to them.
next time make eye contact with a woman before approaching. the girl who looks at you a couple times and returns your smile is the one who would welcome your attention. on the contrast, if she can tell you are looking at her and she seems to be avoiding your eye contact and ignoring you then dont talk to her
They're not interested in you, and unfortunately being even the slightest bit nice to a guy who is hitting on you at the bar tends to give them the idea you're interested, so we default to being bitchy.
They may not be attracted to you or may just not be interested in conversing with strangers im general. I know I don't like people and when I'm hanging out in a public place and a guy tries to hit on me I get sort of annoyed, I'm not there looking for a relationship.
Okay, so there are three kinds of women in that bar. 1) True bitches, you won't have any luck with them 2) women who want to have a good time, but what's hitting on them does not appeal 3) Those who are looking to have that great time and who are more open about it. Sorry there is no way to really know who's who, but I'll tell you why at least no. 2 exists. If you are an attracting woman, you've been hit on by everyone. Literally everyone. Women have standards. So do men... so let's not pretend that women should just accept everything that asks b/c I wouldn't expect guys to. Most decent women try to be polite about rejections. Sorry, no thanks, thanks for asking... but then you get responses like, well you must be a bitch or you think you're too good, or you aren't even worth it, and on and on, so those guys can pretect their ego from being hurt. It becomes really hard to know who's just being genuine and wanting to have a good time and who the a-holes are. Sound familiar? It's unfortunately going to be a lot of trial an error if you're trying to pick up at a bar, but perhaps, and this sounds totally creepy, watch the behavior/body language of your intended for a minute. If she seems more open and friendly with those around her, then try the approach.
Kinda self defense: some girls behave bitchy/obnoxious/mean in bars and nightclubs because bars and nightclubs are the kind of place where they expect drunk/obnoxious/mean guys. If they're there with a boyfriend they fear to get him jealous. If they're there without their boyfriend they fear other people will snitch on them and get him jealous.
Dude, when it comes to clubs you gotta be as bitchy as them. You won't find the best people at those places. I don't know why girls have that weird attitude, perhaps it's looking hot + all the attention they get that makes them feel like goddesses, and a goddess will never fuck with a peasant, so you gotta be a god too, ergo, a bitch xD You may not be a bitch in your regular life, but that's what clubs is, you gotta fake it, you can't be all goody-goody and expect a chick to open her legs for you, I can assure you that works 0% of the time.
bitch shield, you have to penetrate it by calling them out on their behavior by teasing them about it, you can't act offended or get thrown off balance, when you deal with the curveballs the girls will eventually crack and lighten up and let you know if their interested or taken or not interested
While yes, they might be interested in meeting a guy, you're not the image of the guy they have in mind. Plus, they don't know you and think you're only there to get laid. The fact that they don't know you and probably aren't immediately attracted to you puts their bitchshields up.
Bars and nightclubs are difficult venues to pull unless you have some sort of physicality, whether thats height, build, and/or facial features, that separates you from everybody else. Having social status doesn't hurt either.
To say that pulling in clubs/bars requires a fair amount of superficial currency is being polite.
'Many people seem to think that shit testing is a social device unique to women; whereby a form of social test is employed to determine the social fitness of a male in order to discern if he is a viable sexual option or not.'
'when somebody “gives you shit” and fucks with your head to see how you will react, what you are experiencing is typically a (series of) shit test (s) ... We use shit tests to make value judgements about people, likewise they can be used to determine how people cope under pressure. The underlying mechanism of shit tests is to test your mettle.'
The idea that guys make the first move to establish a relationship with a girl is kind of rubbish. Smart money watches for signals from a lady that she is receptive to an approach. Without her subtle invitation you are inviting rejection.
Look for "understanding sex signals" by Leil Lowndes for the masterclass.