Why are military guys so clingy?

I have dated military guys and all of them are super clingy. Especially marines and soldiers. They want to text 24/7, keep in constant contact and say "I love you" all too early. It's creeping me out. Why are they clingy? Don't they have to work?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds like you don't really deserve a person who wants to be involved. We are talking about servicemen who have been out doing their 'work' mainly with people from their own sex not really having any communication to the civilian world we live in. Unfortunately they don't have the knowledge on how to go about things because they were too busy, I don't know, serving for their country?

    If you cared for them you would of spoken about this and asked them to slow it down a tad. We are talking about soldiers and marines here. Communication is key to them and they know the importance of it. They are not wired to understand the bullshit mind games you've probably put them through. They think in a way of "She would tell me if something is up right?"

    You sound very stuck up, and there's plenty of women out there who would love to be involved and build a life with someone from that uniform. So stop talking about them like you deserve the perfect man going.

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    • 3mo

      I have dated over 15 of them from all over the branches. Officers too. I have cheated on my ex once, who is a soldier, with a fighter pilot. He was being too clingy and if I didn't text back in 30 minutes, he would panic. My old flame was the fighter pilot and we were both aviators. We gravitated towards each other but they both found out. Then, I moved onto a navy lieutenant and a marine. Soon, they asked for commitment but I didn't answer any of them because I was seeing at least 10 other military guys. But now, the lieutenant is deployed and I am with the marine. But another fighter pilot keeps in contact with me and some other marine. There are too many people and I don't know what to do. I need to work on my career and there are so many people to reply to. I would never marry a military guy though.

    • 2mo

      You are a prime example of someone who should really just focus on yourself. You've had your fun and it really sounds like you're making unnecessary problems for people who are probably better off without it. Do you, have fun, but don't be official with people if you don't see yourself marrying them and being a thing with them 'death do us part'.

Most Helpful Girl

  • It's the nature of their job, think about it. They are training, killing and using armed devices for a living. It's only normally for them to want a bit of normality in their lives, but because the nature of their work is so dark, a woman in their life to talk to is a god-send.
    It's not a bad thing, think how you'd feel having to be in a long distance relationship while you work in the military, not knowing what your partner is up to on the outside, not being able to have any physical or even emotional contact. It builds up inside :)

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What Guys Said 20

  • Some guys in the military want to marry quickly because themn they can live in their own place so some of them just marry the first girl they find to get various benefits such as being able to get their own place. This may explain the clinglyness.

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  • These are elite soldiers have been fighting, killing and seeing their best friends die, living months on end without anyone to love or someone to love them, flirt and message. Have a heart selfish bitch... fucking hell. This made me angry

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    • 3mo

      didn't mean to say bitch, sorry.

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    • 3mo

      But a lot of marines haven't served combat time. I

    • 2mo

      @MaLifeBeLikeOooAaah Yeah man I don't know in UK, USA or in somewhere else but in here when someone has higher rank than you, they always want insult you or even hit you. Some generals in Turkish army such maniacs :D They called me son of a whore few times, if they were citizens I'd punch them fo' sure but I couldn't cause they aren't.

      One of my uncles became soldier years ago at age of 20, he was tall and well built. However one of the officers were impressed cause of my uncle's size and invited him for a wrestling. My uncle whoped his ass in a short time then it ended up with officer going freakout and hitting, insulting my uncle cause of winning against him :D But there are sometimes good high rank Officers around especially if they are from your hometown they don't let other Officers talk shit to you much :D Like it happend with me, otherwise they would torture me harder.

  • a lot of the time military guys come back and arnt exactly sure how to re intergrate themselves into society. As a result they tend to more often cheerish the little stuff. Also lots of them have seen the worst when it comes to war. Even in the reserves lots of crazy stuff happens. Its also could be that many Marines and soldiers leave and sometimes end up loosing connection to their own family and friends.

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    • 3mo

      But why do they say they love you so early and talk about marriage and kids? It's really creepy.

    • 2mo

      Cause they take the commitment seriously I mean some are given orders that change the way they look at life.

  • The younger Marines seem to have two extremes. They either just want casual sex or they want to introduce you to their mom 15-mins into first meeting you. It's kinda bizarre.

    I thing being a military significant other is one of the hardest long distance relationship you can enter into. The majority that enter into this kinda of relationship are just kids that aren't prepared for this type of relationship.

    Fast forward to their late 20's, if their still married and enlisted they're all bitter and burnt out as fuck. Not just Marines but most military.

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  • I come a massive military family and none of them are clingy at all.

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  • Because of all the stories of soldiers going off to war and being cheated on while they're gone. It's like that tale about all the British soldiers coming back after WWII and finding out lots of their wives had gone off and married Americans who'd been based in England.

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  • Probably because like every military girlfriend/wife cheats when he's deployed, so they need to know you're in 100% in early on so they don't get fucked over.

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  • They are probably the type to live their life one day at a time, never knowing if there will be a tomorrow. So they do everything they do with passion.

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    • 3mo

      They want to get married and have kids. It's really creepy. I can't help but back away when they say they love me. I will never marry a military guy.

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    • 3mo

      @zombiebabe Things get intense so quickly. I think I'm scared of commitment.

    • 3mo

      oh ok :/

  • Lmao I am not clingy moreover I hate clingy people, I feel like saying ''get the f*ck out of me''. Maybe they are clingy because being in Military isn't easy job, you don't have much time for your girlfriend, your family and even for yourself because of homeland's needs. So you miss people you love and it end up with you texting them often, maybe you could show them more tolerance cause of that reason.

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    • 3mo

      I get you. Usually it's the spouse that complains abiut their boyfriend or husbands being cold or aloof. They never reply and don't like PDA. I just run for the hills because most of them talk about marriage, kids or say they love you very early. Or they say they love you a lot. They want a lot of attention and want to talk 24/7. A lot of them didn't get much sleep and would rather talk... even the officers.

    • 3mo

      Soldier life cannot be compared with normal person, most of them haven't got time for theirselves cause of their hard job, they don't have anything to make their mind busy. Working in military isn't like working at somewhere else, you do what they say and if you don't they might blame you with betraying or being a traitor. Its a hard job, I remember when I had free times ( since I am Lieutenant ) its boring as hell and you don't have anything to do, I was chatting with my friends sometimes or I was surfing on the internet from my phone but it wasn't helping either, so there was nothing to do than texting with my ex :D. These guys u said propably had free times in military like I did, they didn't have something to make their mind busy so they thought you about more and missed you :D I think thats why they were texting you more often.

      But yeah talking about marriage or having kids sounds weird in a short time.

    • 3mo

      I would never marry a military guy. I don't want to become a widow or raise my children fatherless. Since I am training to become an aviator, I will be away from home a lot. I don't want my children to be without care from their parents first hand. But military guys are cool to date. It's just that I hate getting involved with military SO drama and stay away from them as much as possible. I hate the dependas that flaunt their SO's rank and act like they are entitled to be treated like they are actually serving. I have seen stolen valor videos and they overreact more so than the veterans themselves.

  • They are young, possibly away from home for the first time. You might be the only aspect of their lives that gives them happiness.
    Do not be creeped out. They want to hold you close and feel a connection with you.

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    • 3mo

      They talk about kids and marriage. I am only 19. I will never marry a military guy. And I will only marry once I am in my early thirties with a stable career and income.

  • maybe because they need to deposit their seed because they will die soon.

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  • Because most people going to the army or marines are wusses who desire to be put under someone else, telling them what to do, etc.

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    • 3mo

      What about clingy officers? Or sergeants?

    • 3mo

      The thing about the army is - there is always people above you, telling you what to do. No matter what position you have in the army, you will always be a follower.

  • Most military men are betas. I'm former military, so I've seen it firsthand. That's why they can sign their life away to serve someone else's interests. It's also why they lose their minds over a little bit of pussy.

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    • 3mo

      They also get married very early and have children. Is that why they fall for dependas?

    • 3mo

      Being betas is basically why dependas exist.

    • 3mo

      How can they hit something so fat and useless? I will never marry a military guy and become a dependa. Or associate with other military wives that brag about their husband's rank and think they deserve the same respect as thise who served. One even wrongly called out stolen valor in the most over exaggerated way.

  • yay free point for first guy

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  • I'm ex British Army , was always the reverse , I can be affectionate , but never clingy. Could be lack of female interaction as a possible theory.

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    • 3mo

      I heard about a lot of military SO complaining that their boyfriends or husbands don't like PDA or never reply/ignore them. They say they feel neglected. But now it's apparently the reverse? Hoe come they don't need to work? And they say they want marriage and kids...

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    • 3mo

      I don't see why soldiers marry the first thing they see when they walk out of basic training. Even if they are fat and uneducated. They often ride on their SO's coattails and ranks. They even buy army girlfriend t shirts, car stickers, handbags, etc. They already assume that they're military too. They overreact to stolen valor.

    • 3mo

      " They often ride on their SO's coattails and ranks " Especially officers' wives !! You are right , they marry a woman that they don't even really find attractive , " settling " , which is a huge mistake for both parties !!

  • Cause they might be shitting their pants cause they boutta die

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  • Most of us have lots of time to text. We can talk while running too ;)

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  • There is another question on gag where a woman got pregnant while her hubby was deployed overseas. They know this happens.

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  • They have to work... but there is a myth and tradition in the military that when someone is deployed overseas, the women will immediately cheat. It is programmed into every Marine and Soldier.

    Ask him about "Jody", the mythological guy who is out their to grab his woman.

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    • 3mo

      So are they clingy because they are checking in on me? And if I don't give them time, they assume it's cheating?

  • I haven't seen clingy, but I have seen controlling...

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What Girls Said 9

  • That's because they might die one day, and want to spent the most possible time with their loved ones.

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  • Well duh, they don't know if that would be their last 'I love you' to you...

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  • I agree it's because they're lonely and don't get much female interaction. Also they want to settle down fast

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    • 3mo

      Yeah. They want to get married and have kids too. It's enough to make me run for the hills. I'm not settling down until I am in my early thirties with a stable career and income.

  • lmao xD

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  • maybe they're too much under pressure... I don't know

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  • The stereotype where I live is that they're jerks, lol.

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  • they are assholes too, I'm never talking to a military guy again

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    • 2mo

      Why is that for? Lol, military guys are serving for homeland needs, they are brave people.

    • 2mo

      @Jan1ssary_ that does not make them good men automatically

    • 2mo

      Yeah. Many do not get actual time in the front line.

  • My sister is dating a marine, and he isn't clingy at all. He texts, and etc but he doesn't go crazy. He doesn't love her any less either. I think it's just the men in general that you are going after. Although, clingy isn't necessarily a bad thing. You should be happy that someone cares enough to want to text/communicate with you 24/7. Most girls can't get that. So, be happy that you do.

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  • This is a dumbass question

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