He says he can "be himself around me," what does he mean?

He told one of his childhood friends that there is a girl he plays video games, watches anime, and can be himself around with but he needs to fix his shit first. What exactly does he mean by that? His friend is our mutual friend and he swears that he is talking about me. I've been with him as a friends with benefits for almost 2 years.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • This means that although the compatibility is high, he still feels deep down he isn't together in his life financially/emotionally/spiritually enough to be with a girl like you.

    This isn't a bad thing! Him being with you so far, is driving him to be a better man. This is a GOOD thing!

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    • 2mo

      well people tell me he's changed a lot since we have been hanging out

    • 2mo

      It is amazing how the right woman can better a man... u should feel great! :)

    • 2mo

      yes it is lol

Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe he has some psychological issues or relationship issues with other friends or partners he needs to work out. He says they are a friend doesn't state if it is with benefits. I had a friend who knew I was unusual (CAIS). I had been married to his twin brother as we all spent some time around each other as kids. That relationship ended with his brother and his brother was involved with others and chose not to stay with me when his grandpa ended our marriage.(we were married underage and his grandpa was in legal dispute with me over business). But the brother I was only friends with occasionally tried to swap places with his brother to be around me. He said it was nothing more than friends and that his brother was being a dick so he'd hang out with me. Anyways that one volunteered to help me have a child later. He surprised me later with wanting to be friends with benefits but once blurted out he loved me. Later he said he meant it as friends. My reaction was WTF was that about? He finally started to see a shrink. She thought he had narcissism (and even slept with her), and perhaps a mood disorder. He was involved in a lot of things with his other friends, family and work. He did definitely need to sort himself out. I'd known him since I was 4.

    Then this other guy we knew took an interest in me. He kept insulting the guy. Called him a douche and other things. That one I also knew since I was about 5. He and his brothers all have their names with D. Very weird family thing. His younger brother was making lewd comments to me and got me angry. His older brother hit on me and was involved with a paranoid schizophrenic girl with other behavioral issues. She tried to have his parents killed. The brother in the middle who was being insulted and I had dated but then he cheated on me and I found out he talked about us to his younger brother.(the lewd comments) I was pretty mad. The other guy who had insulted him got into a fight with him once. I finally got angry enough I walked away from them all. Telling them I am a person not a sex toy to be argued over.

    I think they all had issues to work out. At one point the guy who had insulted the others was fine though emotional switching to flat (mood disorder?). It was the others that showed narcissism. I think they needed to all get a room and mess about and later they did. If guys want to play with guys fine but don't use a person as an excuse.

    Sometimes its healthier to find something different.

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    • 2mo

      I know what you mean I had a psychotic EX boyfriend you had A LOT of issues and needed up leaving me scarred for life

What Guys Said 26

  • it means that he feels comfortable to be himself around you. really that simple. that you are a person he is comfortable with, that it's easy being around you...

    it's a good thing

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  • You're an idiot. "Fix his shit first" means he has no desire to be with you for anything but free pussy with no commitment. He's implying he needs to work on himself before he commits then he'll want you as a real girlfriend. This is all one huge lie to keep stringing you along so you'll keep fucking him like you are. You're being played. What do you think of him now?

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    • 2mo

      well for one i dont believe he's talking about me. second of all and i dont care about free pussy b/c thats the arrangement I SET for him. my ex beat the shit out of me and i dont want a boyfriend or marrige but i am an adult w needs. i am worried he has feelings b c if he does then its over. i already tried to leave twice but he keeps coming back. he already swore up and down he doesn't have feelings for me and im scared he wants somethig

    • 2mo

      All he wants is free pussy so you're safe

    • 2mo

      LOVE THIS ANSWER

  • People put up front in front of other. Maybe they feel like they would be judged by something they are into or the way the act. You want to find someone you are completely comfortable in front of. When someone can let their guard down of truly be themselves great things can happen.

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  • I was listening to Kanye yesterday and I fully support his run for president just because he's better then Waka Flocka.

    This message has been endorsed by jeb bush

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  • It means what it means. This girl has the offerings that he is seeking. He can be himself because she is almost a absolute match. Fix shit means he has to eliminate or self improve something to get her. If you have feelings beyond the friends with benefits. Its probably a good time to speak up. If he does not agree its not your place to change it or force him to.

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    • 2mo

      tbh th I do have feelings but I want to do nothibg about them. I was ij a bad relationship b4 him and om still healing from all the psychological damage my ex did to me. I'm not blaming my friends with benefits or in any way comparing him but I havr a lot i have to sort out before I even comsider anything serious. that's why I cannot be anything more to him

  • he is an alien

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  • It means that he doesn't feel nervous around you , like one tiny thing is gonna make you not want to be with him. He feels like you accept him. This is a very good thing and is a very important barrier to break in order to have a good relationship.

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  • He can be real and not hypocritical.

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  • Oh i know that very well. I have a friend just like her or you. She's like my spirit animal or something. I don't have to worry about pretending or trying to be something I'm not, flexing my muscles, showing off my good side of my face, etc etc.

    Basically a girl who makes a guy feel completely confident in himself around you. It's a great compliment and a good quality to have, this a moment where you pat yourself on the back or do your own signature celebration dance.

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    • 2mo

      thanks :) I try to be a good friend beyond anything else

  • I think he likes you but he might have a few issues he wants to sort out in his head.

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  • It means he trusts her, but doesn't feel like he deserves her at the moment.

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  • He feels comfortable around you and trusts you

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  • What @Prof_Don said

    He feels that you don't put up any false pretenses

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  • Sounds like he may want to get more serious with you. Personally that sounds like the kind of girl I would want to date seriously.

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  • he feels comfortable around you, its a good sign.

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  • I dunno, I am myself around everyone and not all people like me but the right ones do.

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  • Don't expect him to leave the room when he farts...

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  • That's means he's pretty much hooked on you but you are friends and don't want to fuck it up. Being able to be urself around a girl is absolute GOLD! very hard to find. That's a pretty big compliment

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    • 2mo

      thanks and yeah we are pretty huge needs together lol

    • 2mo

      omg I meant nerds not needs😑😑

  • He sees mad potential in you and he feels he needs to step his game up for you before he can even think to be with you.

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  • Maybe it means that he can show his true colors around you and likes you more than a fuck buddy?

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  • he wants more than friends with benefits but doesn't know how to be in a proper relationship yet.

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  • How old is he?

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  • It means he's too young to have a serious girlfriend

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  • It means just that. He isn't afraid to show his "true colors."

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  • It means exactly what he said, he can be himself, what's not to get?

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  • He likes you but thinks he isn't good enough for you.

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What Girls Said 7

  • He can spank your ass and you won't run away, that's what he means

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  • He means he doesn't have to take you seriously. That's what I thought before I even read you were friends with benefits. It isn't exactly a good thing tbh :/

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    • 2mo

      I don't take him seriously either lol I'm scared he has feelings

    • 2mo

      haha sounds like you's are fine then

  • He is comfortable being with you, he enjoys himself when hanging out

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  • it means he is comfortable around u and knows he can trust u and u won't judge him :)

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  • He feels comfortable around you. I don't think you can gather more based on what you said

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  • He likes you but he feels he is not ready in his life to be with you.

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  • my boyfriends little brother like all the time. Last week when I was over I caught him looking up my skirt as I was going up the stairs but only this time I paused and spread my legs so he could clearly see I had no panties on, then I went upstairs and banged his brother my boyfriend for about five minutes. After my boyfriend chased me as he had a big essay to write on my way out I went into his brother's room to find him jerking off, then I had sex with him too.

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