BOYS: Is being too DIRECT a bad thing?

I went on a great date with this guy (him and I had met 2 times prior to our date in a group setting). We made out at the end of the date and he said we should go on another date. He also texted me the next day saying we should go on another date. Then I didn't hear from him for about 2 days so on the second day I texted him saying: so when am I seeing you?

He replied and said: whatcha up to this weekend? movie at my place?

^^ His response gave me the impression that he just wants to sleep with me

so I responded and said: sex invite? lol

Then he got kind of upset and told me that he wants to get to know me and that he is 'not that kind of guy' and that he'd be direct if he just wanted sex...i told him I was sorry and he continued chatting...he told me he'd call me sometime next week to schedule something

Question for you guys: was it wrong to send that text? was it too direct/a bad thing? do you guys think he will actually call? (or was he saying that to sound nice)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Bad text yes.

    I GET you being cautious. That is prudent. And there is nothing wrong with being direct, but that was borderline rude. perhaps a better way would have been to say "I would be happy to come to your place, as long as we have some boundaries in place."

    That sets a tone that you are in to him, but being smart, and that doesn't assume he just wants sex.

    I hope it works out...

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What Guys Said 3

  • I think it depends on you guys comfort level. If you already slept with him then it would be fine. If you haven't, then it may kill the sexual tension. If you think he is a player then it's a great way to call him out.

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  • No, it wasn't too direct. It's better that you know what you're getting into, instead of getting used by someone THINKING they really like you.

    I find it's usually best to be direct with the other gender, just in general.

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  • I don't think that was a bad thing to text. It's almost funny. You can guess what guys want, that will come useful in a lot of circumstance me thinks. I don't think your boyfriend got too upset, just a little upset that you seem to think of him in that way. However, it is probably not a big deal

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What Girls Said 1

  • yeah I honestly think you were being too direct. it sounds like he did want sex but he got mad that you "got him out"

    because it makes you sound like you have an attitude.

    he might not call you back.

    if anything I only think that because you were the one who had to make contact.

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