Would you stop talking to a girl if she hooked up with another guy when you guys were "talking"?

To me there is a fine line between talking and dating. I may be completely in the wrong for doing this but I like to keep my options open while I'm "dating". If you are "talking" to a girl (ie going on dates and seeing where things are going) and she hooked up with another guy, would you quit talking to her completely or forgive her since you weren't officially dating?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There's nothing wrong with your keeping your options open while you're "dating" if you're not in any kind of "official" relationship because you never know how that will turn out. You could meet a guy you like better when hooking up with this other guy. So you're okay with what you'd be doing. However, if the guy you were talking to was really starting to get serious with you he'd no doubt feel hurt and might start getting less serious. There's always this chance. So that's the chance you take if you've been starting to get serious with him too. But if you're not all that serious with him yet and he feels the same as you do, then no harm is done because you both would have the right to talk to other guys. Whenever you feel that you want to keep your options open while you're "dating" it's because the guy you're "dating" hasn't stole your heart yet. You're not ready to be exclusive with him so just go on and keep your options open. A guy that would stop talking to a girl if she hooked up with another guy when you guys were "talking" is one that's looking into getting more serious with you in the future. If he hasn't gotten that serious with you yet, you're doing that might encourage him to try to do things that will help you like him better and not do the things you're shown any displeasure with in his behavior. In other words, he might get jealous but that might serve to increase his desire for you because other guys are interested in you too. Often that works that way if a guy really likes you. If I really liked her I wouldn't stop talking because she's still available. Stop talking would be giving up way too easily for a girl you like. She'd be worth fighting for.

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What Guys Said 6

  • I'd never forgive her , whether I thought we were dating or not...hey, she can look up the other guy some other time. It's just plain rude to slap someone in the face like that.

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  • If she was still single I'd still talk to her, although I'd feel a bit like she wasn't interested fully in me and would rather look elsewhere since it seems to be what she's doing despite the fact she was talking to me. If that makes sense...

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  • It's your business. You are free to do as you choose. That being said, if you know for sure that the guy was EXCLUSIVELY dating you, I think it's wrong to continue as if nothing happened. It doesn't sound like you're ready for an exclusive relationship. If that's what he's gunning for I'd let him down easy & tell him that you want to keep your options open @ the moment. JUST THAT. NO FULL DISCLOSURE. If you'd both like to continue @ least he'd be hip to part of your thought process. He may split, he may not, but at least that way he gets some say in your budding relationship. So to answer your question, If it was me, YES I would stop dating. Friendship would be possible, but that disclosure would put a hell of a wrench in our courtship process. So in short, don't tell him what you did. Tell him that you're taking a step back for re-evaluation purposes. Good luck!

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  • Hmm, I suppose I probably WOULD. Not necessarily because I look down on it or anything. It's just my personal preference to not pursue that type of girl.

    But, I'm not really a "talking" type anyway. I tend to go to the "dating" phase quickly. ...I think. I'm a bit confused now because you said "talking" includes "going on dates" lol...

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  • Yes, because I don't want to waste my time and effort into a girl who won't do the same. Her dating someone else would make me think that she is uninterested in having a relationship with me.

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  • I would move on to another girl

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What Girls Said 1

  • I honestly don't see the reason why someone would get upset. Unless you guys have specifically spoken about taking your relationship to the next level and becoming officially exclusive, why get mad? I know for me personally, I wouldn't do it, just because it's just something I wouldn't do morally. But, if you're dating, you're still playing the field, doesn't mean you stop and drop everything for this one guy. Everyone's different, but I think telling someone from the jump about where you stand at least second, or third date, you should probably already have a good idea if whether you will pursue this person.

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