How much does education matter when dating?

Just asking because I'm 35 and although I have been to college and have got some qualifications I don't have an actual degree. I started working when I left school and have never been to university.

At work, and in other areas of my life, I am surrounded by people who have degrees and PhDs. And, I worry that I'm beneath them. I also worry that a guy who is university-educated would not want to date me, because I've not attained a specific level of education.

Is this crazy? Does it matter? I'm looking for someone I can converse with on a wide range of subjects, someone I'm attracted to for their brain and sense of humor as well as their physical features. I'm well travelled, have experienced quite a lot of interesting things, I enjoy reading various fiction and non-fiction books, volunteer in my spare time and am funny and reasonably intelligent (although - I'll put my hands up - I'm terrible at mathematics. Don't even go there!). But I worry that me not going to university would count against me where it matters. It seems (from looking at online dating) that some guys want their intellectual equal and for them that equal = degree). And that maybe even if they don't care perhaps their family would and that would cause friction?

There's a guy I quite like at work but he has a Masters degree and although he stares at me often, part of me thinks that he wouldn't be interested because I didn't go to uni as well.

What do you think? Is it possible to have a relationship with someone who isn't as well educated? Or are you someone who didn't go to university and is dating/married to someone who did?

Thanks!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I hate to say it, but I dated a girl Who had a degree, and I only finished high school, went on to run a pub and from there into construction, and we had a great time together. But the life skills are different, we have them, they don't, they rely on their education to much, where we use common sense, and on that note, it failed to work out, but she was a great girl, just a bit nutty in my opinion, for instance, the greens never went into the same draw as the salad stuff i.e. tomatoes, cucumber, lettuce etc, veggies had their own draw, and I refused to see any logic in it, and cooking, she always followed a book, where I would use common sense, ie don't forget what's in the oven or it will burn, no not her, time everything, prep while you cook, etc. I was like, WHAT, so you see, it can work, but the likes of you and me have to lose the common sense stuff, because they always think educated people know better, x

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What Guys Said 9

  • I think it's possible, yes. I'm university educated but I'd rather not meet women who are. The reason being that the "educated" women are harder to get along with and have higher expectations.

    At the end of the day a man just wants to come home and have a decent conversation with a humble woman. Education, by the way, doesn't mean you'll have anything to talk about. Life experience counts too and that's what you've got over them.

    Maybe that man finds you stunning and is a bit too shy to approach you.

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  • Oh please, university degrees are one of the biggest mal-investments someone can make. I dropped out of an undergraduate university because it was a waste of time and a serious waste of money. PhD's are researchers and if that's what they enjoy, all the power to them. But I doubt a PhD can rebuild a 350 small block. Researchers are useless in the real world. They're only useful for finding information in academia (which is not to say they don't contribute to the real world). Intelligence does not correlate to success in the real world nor a university education. Some of the biggest CEO names did not receive their university degrees. What you are going through is insecurity. You have to build confidence in yourself and your intelligence, and career or education choice will not influence how great the connection is between you and a man. Confidence is key. Femininity is key. That is the best advice I can give you. Your friend and pal, baddy2shoos. Done.

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  • Between the lines I'm reading that you don't think you have yet achieved your full academic potential and that for that reason, you think less of yourself.
    Guys may or may not care what you've achieved academically. But that doesn't seem to be the issue. You will never be able to hide what you think of you! I suggest you sign up for some credits somewhere. by the way , maybe that's where you'll find the right guy.

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  • I like girls who have intelligence, but you don't necessarily have to have a degree to be intelligent, at the end of the day its just a piece of paper saying you're qualified to do something. Ultimately I care more about her personality and her genuine intelligence than her education.

    As long as she can go toe to toe with my witty remarks and match my sense of humour, then she qualifies as intelligent to me.

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  • you should not "feel beneath them" particularly when dating , work is about your education but a relationship is about a physical and emotional attraction. To me I don't care if she is educated has money where she comes form or who she's related to I am simply interested in her.

    On a side note: some higher educations bred a attitude which is a turn off because of the attitude not the education.

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  • Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in DATE.

    i quoted it from Lemony Snicket, Horseradish..

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  • To me, absolutely 0...

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  • It is generally the women who lool for educational qualification as a primary criteria for marriage.Men are not that serious about it.

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  • Education doesn't matter much at all. In the end people today are going to pick partners based on the same criteria that our ancestors based their choices on. It may not be what people want to hear, but education is far too new to the human race to have had a significant impact on our base desires. Intelligence can be sexy, but a degree is next to meaningless when it comes to attraction.

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What Girls Said 3

  • It doesn't matter. If it makes you feel any better, I only have a BA in Fashion Design and several other short courses that really have no curricular value. It doesn't mean my brain is limited to what papers say. If you're a regular reader, a curious person and have interest for many things in life, you are more interesting than the average person who sticks to TV. If he's a great guy, he shouldn't worry how many degrees you have. He should worry if you can enrich his life with general wisdom and humour or not.

    If you worry so much, try to get a degree. I'm 26 and the degree I'm planning on obtaining is a PhD in something that has nothing to do with my undergraduate program (Screenwriting). Stop worrying about whether it matters in dating or not, or if it makes you less in relation to others. Worry if you genuinely feel like you can do more and aren't doing enough for YOUR own.

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  • You are who you are, potential suitors will have to take it or leave it. Simple as that. Some people will be interested and some will see it as a deal breaker but I'm not sure how that would make you "beneath" them lol? Just means you don't have a degree and they do..only a pretentious dbag would think they are "better" than you because of that..

    If you're not happy with your level of education, don't worry! You can go back to school :) at any time! People of all ages go back to school. Go back and get a degree if it will make YOU happy.. not to please a mate.

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  • It doesn't.

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