Thoughts on fat girls who chase fit guys?

I have noticed that online it is constantly overweight women who message me wanting to date me. I go to the gym 5-6 days a week and made a lot of progress. Yet even in one of the profiles I read this same heavier girl was ranting about not wanting to be a twig and how she wants to eat what she wants.

why would the same girls chasing fit guys not want to put it in effort to at least be in decent shape and even try to bash thinner girls? Wouldn't they also want to avoid a fit guy as they are a serious potential to be a health nut and possibly get overly critical of things like their diet and lack of exercise? Some of the girls that have messaged me are in the seriously obese area here.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't know.
    Same reason fat guys chase fit girls? That's who they are attracted to. There is also this huge fat acceptance thing going on and instead of everyone trying to be for and healthy, they want to deflect and make everyone else the bad guy. It's okay to love yourself and love your body, that's cool. What's not cool is bashing skinny chicks and demonizing anyone who does not agree with the lifestyle. I think that women in general do stuff like this without realizing that they are coming off as catty and unattractive but rather thinking that they will ignite something in a man's mind that will make him say, "oh, a girl that can eat! Forget these twigs! She is right!"
    Stuff like this www.themilitantbaker.com/.../...at-girls-so-i.html is what is making it easier for people to stay inactive and unhealthy because it's saying that regardless of what you look like, you can totally bang hot guys too. Not that there is anything inherently wrong with this, but it's just a bad message and results in the thing you're talking about: zero willingness to make positive changes, because why should you have to change to please other people?
    It also results in skinny bashing and the type of deflecting that guilts people into thinking that they're wrong for not being attracted to people who are overweight. I used to be overweight, but I didn't do a lot of skinny bashing and I certainly want pushing for fat acceptance. I did what I had to do and became fit and healthy. You would be surprised at how many fit guys like heavy chicks though... I had no problems in that department. And I think that a lot of women experience the same.
    Short answer is that it is their preference. And if you're not interested, let them down nicely like I hope you would do for anyone else...

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    • Well said, bubbie. This whole acceptance thing is crazy. I don't think we should be mocking people per se, or 'shaming', or whatever the PC buzzword is today, but we sure as hell shouldn't be fostering it. The simple fact is that its unhealthy to be overweight. That's it, there's nothing else to it, it's science. The human body works how it works, there's no getting around it. When I eat too much and don't exercise, I put on weight like anyone else. The problem with the world today is that no one wants to work for anything, they want it handed to them. I'd bet that a lot of heavy people would turn down a free gym membership and say they're comfortable with themselves, but would take a free liposuction in a heartbeat. I want to eat pizza and cheeseburgers everyday, I'd rather skip the gym and play XBox, but its not fantasy world, there are repercussions from that. I know there are a handful of true glandular disorders, but most people in that situation are lazy with a poor diet.

    • Yea I notice a lot of the Maria Kang hate that erupted overtime. My area is full of obese women and I seriously cannot date them. I feel like a lot of them just view a fit guy as a piece of meat like girls say guys view them as. So I'd never feel comfortable. I have seen different types of girls who say they won't chase fit guys but I notice others do. The ones who message me online seem to claim to want a relationship but in the back of my head I feel like they are messaging me cause of my appearance now.

What Girls Said 12

  • well what do you consider fat?
    It's a lot easier for men to stay lean. And obviously women have more fat and I feel there are a lot of mixed messages about is considered attractive and what is not

    That being said, we all get hit on by people we're not attracted to, so don't be a dick about, reject them nicley and move on

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  • Yeah! I mean, who the hell do they think they are, messaging you! :P

    I've been attracted to guys who were overweight. Why? Oh I don't know, maybe because there's a lot more to someone than just their physical characteristics and they happened to be incredible people. Not everyone is so dismissive based on weight but you never know what people's deal breakers are until you approach them. Plus some fit guys prefer bigger girls.

    Also, do you know for a fact that they are bashing thinner girls or that they haven't tried to get in shape? You're making some sweeping generalizations about their behavior. Don't like 'em? Don't date 'em.

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  • i dont generally agree with what most girls do.
    but i feel like its just their sexual prefferance. it doesn't matter.
    some guys like bigger girls anyway. everyone is beautiful in their own way, so dont judge.
    and im sure that even though those bigger girls say that they dont wanna be skinny. some of them want to and have probobally tried to get healthy and fit before but failed. so they just say that to keep up a facade or something.
    where as others might mean that they love their curves and what not.
    either way, i feel like you shouldn't really be judging them.
    whats on the outside doesn't matter nearly as much as whats on the inside.
    and maybe getting a fit guy is the push they need in order to have a healthy lifestyle? who knows

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  • Maybe they are hoping you are a chubby chaser, or maybe they don't see themselves as fat; sometimes perception is a bitch, or maybe they just like fit guys. Who really knows for sure.

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  • oh dude are you a fat-chick magnet?

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  • I agree with Izzy2102...

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  • well im a fit girl and i see all the fit guys with bigger girls so i wonder the same thing but people like what
    They like i guess

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  • why dont you date one of the fat chicks and take her to the gym along with you and get her in shape?

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  • Regardless of weights, sizes, people have the right to chase after anything or anyone they love :)

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  • Maybe their level of confidence is so high that the believe they can get any guy they wish.

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  • how fat are we talking here,,, and how "fit" are you?

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    • Their body's shaped like a round ball. I'm 180ish at 13%BF.

    • well it dosent mean you have to say yes , just ignore or reject them...
      if i said yes to every fat ugly guy that asked me out i wouldint be here would i?
      and im a gym rat,, and never get rated less than an 8..
      i guess now you know how women feel lol

    • Well if you look at guys on here who complain about chasing what they want, the girls all tell them to keep chasing these girls. I think the problem is that telling them to get in shape seems to "be offensive."

  • LOL you are going to get a lot of hates here. Well it happens to both genders. I am fit too and there are so many 'big' guys who tried to approach me. I don't mind it. I mean I can't stop people from being attracted to me but when its too much I can't stand them. Some of them can't take 'no' as an answer and started to being sarcastic saying I am chubby too. I can see why this bugs you. Well the answer is many of them want a hot body but don't want to put effort on it.Its simple. So they go and find somebody who look good. Defense mechanism?

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    • My main issue is how they whine that "guys want twigs" and skinny bash. Immediately turn off.

What Guys Said 5

  • Well, I chase after tiny women and I'm a tall guy... We are not supposed to be complete copies of the people we desire to date. I always wonder if I see an unattractive couple if they are honestly attracted to each other. I know it is not pc for me to say but I couldn't be with an really ugly girl. Even if I was really ugly myself...
    Does that change if you are used to look at an uglier person in the mirror? Does that alter your perception of beauty?

    And some fit guys like heavy girls. Also, some heavy girls take whatever they can get. I've been approached by these girls and they usually are quite sexually agressive... They make clear that they put out easily. A lot of guys will have sex with anyone who is willing and they know it.

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  • Kinda the same concept when an overweight guy tries to get with a skinny or fit girl. They are purely going off of attraction and not thinking of comparability. Reason being, lets be honest both male and females find fit/athletic builds more attractive and apealing to look at. But, when it comes to online dating they really have nothing to lose so they try, why the fit girls do not have to try because they are getting flooded with messages from guys already.

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  • They can chase who ever they want, doesn't mean they will get it

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  • I literally just LOL so hard at them.

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    • I think some of them have high self-esteem because they get ONS'd by fit guys. Stupid if you think about it.

  • More power to them. I like a confident girl who goes after what she wants and doesn't let failure turn her into a quivering mess.

    Fact is, there are guys out there who like larger girls. And that doesn't mean the guy has to be fat too.

    These women know the odds are against them, but that doesn't stop them playing the game. If they go after enough guys, they might find themselves with a fit guy who loves larger women. And then they have their jackpot.

    Just be polite when you turn them down. No one needs you to be a dick about it.

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