When I say I have a boyfriend, why do guys STILL hit on me?

[Reeses-pieces777]

why is it that when I saw I have a boyfriend, guys STILL hit on me. I don't say that ALL guys do this, I just say that and from experience that when I say I am in a relationship right now, they still keep trying? Why don't they get the point? or do I have to say 'I do not want to be with you'? what would you say to get a guy to stop hitting on you? I just ignore past some point. thankx

[jusabarasida]

faceinthecrowd makes sense but you gota look at it from another point of view.. yea you tell em you have a bf.. but do you realize what kinda society we are living in these days? just look at it statistically.. why do you think girls end up breaking up with their bfs most of the time.. its because they meet someone else.. so to most guys, it doesn't matter if your single or not, theyll still try to win you over.. I think it has to do with how they are raised.. if they are raised around things like divorce and values that seem to say 'relationships don't need to respected, just go for what you want no matter who ur hurting' , then they have no respect for you or your bf... I'm not from america but I was raised here.. came here when I was 9 so I've seen both sides..completely different value systems.. I can totally understand your frustration though.. its exactly because of assholes like those guys why I find it extremely hard to trust most girls who are raised with those kinda values.. luckily there are girls like you still out there =] thanks

[da5id]

and then there's the thing with the mindgame:

from his point of view the guy can never tell if you're lying because you're not interested, telling the truth, lying because you want someone hitting on you to reevaluate themselves and lying in order to see if he is really interested in you even if you made him wait or just to test their game and for each those reasons you still have what the posters before me said namely that they "dont care but do it anyways.

another problem is that actions don't have clear labels so sometimes people misunderstand you blowing them off for encouragement to try it further for ex. if you stated to walk away to them it could look like a test if they are the type that "gets what he wants"

[lorelai87]

Well, in my opinion, a lot of guys are pigs. Plus, the fact that they don't really care. They probably think "I'll make this girl interested in me so that she'll leave her boyfriend." I really think its an ego thing. The fact that you say you're in a relationship makes them think you're more of a challenge. So making you break up with your boyfriend or getting you to cheat on him or be with them means they have succeeded. Therefore, they see you as a prize and a boost to their confidence. It's sad really but that's the way it is. I know how you feel. Guys hit on me all the time too now that I have a boyfriend. Just tell them to leave you alone and f*** off. It usually works. :D

[palek]

Next time you're at the supermarket, go to the deli section, and pull of about twenty of the paper numbers by which they notifiy you when its your turn. Put these in your purse, and the next time some boorish schmuck won't relent in hitting on you, give him one of the numbers, and walk away.

[BrettH]

its an ego thing. as sad and pathetic as it truly is most of what most guys do is driven by their ego and nothing else. they want nothing more than to see a committed girl cheat with him and basically want to watch the happy relationship fall apart because theirs is nothing more but lies on top of lies filled with alcohol and abuse to top it off with divorce, bankruptcy and a truly pathetic existence they call life..

[Xplic1T]

A lot of times we want what we can't have just purely because somebody else has it. Take it as a complement and give yourself that +1 ego boost. We all know you might hate this but believe me, it must make you feel pretty good at the end of the day to know you are desired.

[Wamber]

Your answer seems well-meaning, but at least from my experiences, I do not find it flattering. I find it an insult. It's one thing to receive a compliment; it's another entirely to be treated like an object to be commandeered. It's insulting to be treated as if I have no respect for my relationship and would easily jump ship.

[stevo]

Sheer ignorance. Some guys do that very thing just for one purpose: to annoy you. And some do it because they truly think that there isn't any girl in this world that wouldn't have them. That's my pov.

[FaceInTheCrowd]

Some people have no values. It is my understanding that people who have no regard for the attachments of others typically place no value on their own attachments and marriages :(

[Infogirl]

Men want what they can't have...that's why.

[Anonymous]

your that gud ;D