Girls how do you feel when a guy walks out during an argument?

[NotSoBad]

I'm a guy and whenever I get frustrated during a conversation I leave the house. The thing is I'm going to come back I just need to think about things and calm down. It's almost like an adrenaline rush that needs like 10 to 20 mins to settle.

So why do girls get so upset when a guy leaves?

Do they really believe he will never come back?

What goes on in a womans head when a guy has left the house?

Sometimes I leave the house to settle myself down before I return to finish the argument.

I always stay to finish the argument right then and there.

I never argue

[Anonymous]

okay, well what should women do when the guy is the one to immediately call for a break up when the girl was just talking without screaming but definitely being assertive? how can anyone keep their cool in that situation, when the last response you expect is a call to break up. Yes then the girl is incredibly hurt since 9 hours before the guy was being very loving with her. Then he turns completely mean and wants to take off... and if she asks him not to and is in shock he turns even meaner. My situation: my boyfriend asked me to move in with him and days later I discovered he was talking to an ex fuck buddy and deleting all the text messages. He had no proof that he wasn't talking to her constantly or inappropriately and since then I have found it hard to trust him as he proved he was capable of hiding things from me. I should have left but he asked me to stay and that he would do anything to make amends and help me trust him. But now 10 mo. later we have trust related issues every month, mostly because instead of reassuring me and understanding me he gets mad that I don't trust him. We had an issue about that two days ago and he said that he would get the text transcripts so that I could see he did nothing wrong and threaten that if after I saw them I didn't stop with the mistrust we were over. I did not want him to never follow through, so I contacted the cellphone company to get the cellphone usage that way, since I was sure he could not get text transcripts. My reasoning being that perhaps he was right and maybe I should just seek proof that he wasn't constantly talking to this girl, since clearly my main issue with getting over his shadiness was he never gave me any proof. I came home and told him this and POOF he broke up. He acted completely mean and heartless with me and called me a liar saying that the bill usage would not prove anything and that I would continue these fights; even though before I found out he was deleting text messages to an ex-buddy I NEVER acted that way with him. No matter how many times I told him all I needed was proof he wasn't constantly texting her he said it was bs. guess I begged for forgiveness in the end because I do feel bad that I haven't been able to get over it. Im so hurt that he treats me as if this is all my doing. I did start seeing a counselor to help me get over the trust issue, but due to insurance issues haven't been able to continue for 5 weeks.

[Apope16]

To immediately jump to breaking up is abusive.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for this question: this is exactly what my boyfriend does. I understand that you need a brief cool down or some space, but it doesn't sting any less. When a guy walks out in the middle of an argument and says nothing like- I need a few minutes, or be right back, or let me cool for a second then we can continue- girls may assume its something we did or said. Or that we may get signals completely crossed and take it as your threw with us. It really depends on the girl for specific reactions.

When my guy and I were arguing and I saw him preparing to storm out (in the middle of the night 32degree whether in pajama pants and a coat) I took it as he was tired of hearing me talk and would rather be anywhere than with me. I was going to leave too and just give up but I don't like to leave loose ends so we were going to finish that conversation if I had to wait 3days without going anywhere (that and I was worried about him since he didn't take his cell phone, or license, or hat/gloves). Yes, he did come back after 16mins but if wasn't worried about him or cared about my pride I would have left. Case & Point that's the kind of reaction a girl can have. Sorry if its winded- hope this helps!

[charms2]

I think its plain rude and insensitive, my guy in the middle of an argument would just tell me he is done, so essentially he is telling me to shut up or if I continue talking he won't be listening he would then leave the room and go talk on the phone with his friends or go play video games and completely ignore me. It wouldn't matter if I was in the middle of talking to him or not he would just plain ignore me. I"m at a point now where the arguments have become too much and they never get resolved I've basically shut down.

[NotSoBad]

Sometimes people time to think... when someone is overly emotional during a conversation it will only end badly. At times, I need space... I need to collect my thoughts. When I leave its not that I don't care... At one moment I might think.. "She's wrong about that..." but I have also left for awhile and thought to myself "I think she might be right" If I had stayed and listened to her badgering me and forcing me to answer I would have said something stupid and thoughtless.

[Ajl577]

Wow.. ok. Let's take the man/woman thing out of this and like other girls are saying it comes down to being an adult. Would YOU like it if someone walked away from YOU during ANY kind of discussion that YOU felt was important. What if your boss did that to you while you were trying to address an issue? Hmmmm? When anyone does that it's RUDE and DISMISSIVE. Honestly if a guy is rude enough to walk away without an explanation, I'm going to assume you don't want or need to come back and I'm going to treat you like it. Would YOU like that? You see? however if he says he needs a minute that's fine but it does NOT mean the problem is solved/ended and its certainly not a tool to be used to avoid things. I expect the problem to be dealt with upon arrival. If we cannot resolve the issue, depending what it is, it can either be overlooked, agreed to be disagreed upon OR we need to go our separate ways but that all depends on the level of commitment you both have to each other :-/

[Anonymous]

I agree with Chillax. I think some girls just like to yell at their guy because they're angry about something instead of talking about it. I think screaming at each other is immature and that we ought to be able to talk things out instead of yelling and arguing because it really doesn't solve anything anyway except to get each other more pissed off at each other. Also, I think that guys just get tired of their women wanting to have the upper hand by yelling or blaming the guy for all the problems in the relationship. I think girls need to take a look at why they are so upset. I think a lot of it comes from them feeling out of control of the relationship or situation. I went out with several control freaks and when they didn't get their own way with me, they would scream, throw fits, pout, not talk to me for days, etc.It gets old after awhile. Girls who want to control are totally insecure and don't have a life of their own. So, no, I don't put up with it. If my current girlfriend would start screaming at me, our relationship would be over, because I believe in talking about things, not getting violent or something like that. This is just my opinion.

[Chillaxitwnthappen]

Lol, the girl just wants you there so she can yell at you. Or she's menstrual, like all girls are. When you wanna leave, tell her you'll be back, and just leave. Or just tell her before all the upcoming arguments that when you leave she will be back. Ughh girls are so annoying.

[alpinestars-2002795]

X2

[emmaroh]

It's terrible when you do that! I don't think you need any more explanation than what has already been said though. Just a little advice to make us feel a little better and perhaps prevent worse future arguments for you (hopefully).

If you seriously need to leave, that' fine just :

a) wait till the argument is over and take off, but let her know you are coming back, that you just need to cool off..

b) if you can't wait till the end then, let her know you love her and you will come back to finish it up, but that right now you just need to cool off.

[magicgirl]

I personally feel like he just not strong enough to face problems and solve it, And the other thing that comes through my mind is that I really took the whole thing too far and that means I made a mistake and well, When you make a mistake you feel bad and upset. If the argument is HUGE and it's more like a fight and the guy leaves, I feel like he hates me and he is gonna cheat on me, And that upsets me.

Generally I think leaving during an argument won't solve the problem, I think if 2 people have problems they should calm down and logically talk about it then afterwards you can leave to calm yourself. But leaving is just disrespectful and won't lead you anywhere good.

Drink water to cool down during the conversation and ask the girl to calm down so you can stay and finish it together.

[Kiara]

My boyfriend does that to me. At first I would get upset and cry because I thought he wasn't coming back. The last time he did it. Before he walked out he came to me and said "Baby I'm coming back, I just need to think for a minute. " Now when he does it, I let him go.

What goes on when a guy leaves is that he isn't coming back.

Now my boyfriend and I just talk instead of him walking away.

[catgirl9]

How would you feel if you were in the middle of talking (or yelling) and someone just up and left? That would make me angrier. In order to resolve fighting, BOTH people need to be there.

[crossroad]

"do not do what you don't want others to do unto you" thingy.leaving in the middle of argument is annoying.if she leave and not listen to you would you be happy?

[Lesae]

I hate it personally. But, I would rather the guy to settle down then be mean and mad. I think he will come back but he will get the silent treatment. :)

[Sugarcoat]

My guy gets really pissed when I do this as well.

Sometimes you just need to calm down, you know?

[Anonymous]

It feels like the problem won't get fixed, and you just "left us". This just makes us scared, alone and eventually we get more mad.

[Anonymous]

This is a stupid notion. I'm sorry. It's immature. A man can't stay in the room like a grown up and resolve an issue? I mean seriously. What are we? 12? This makes no sense to me. If you are getting upset. Calm yourself down.

[CorruptedDocument]

With a decent chunk of women, you can't resolve the issue. Leaving is the most mature thing to do instead of fighting a never ending verbal war.