Why girls don't respect you and see you as boyfriend material!

[Starfishlover]

I am going to lose a lot of friends for this. But again, this is merely an educational article in hopes that it would spark insight into those men who might find it a bit difficult to find a date and keep her.

I have been encouraged to write one about men when I was going to make it next week, but who am I to deny those who apparently like my writing (yes, I know I am modest haha)?

1) You don't put in enough effort

Every thing in life is a team effort. If you choose to be in a relationship, it is team effort. Even if you want to go on a date, you have to make an effort to put your best foot forward. Little things like thinking ahead and doing a chore for your lady is not too much to ask for. Or on a date, you would rather be on your phone than talking to that beautiful girl in front of you. I have certainly been treated horribly and replaced over a phone...such is life.

2) You have the most disgusting ideas about women

Yes, girls are magical creatures. Yes, you want to have sex with us. Fair enough. But I have seen some of you "Macho Men", and catcall out of the car or harrass females online or in real life with derogatory terms. Yes we know you are wanting to be the head gorilla of the group, but this is what you look like. Have some self respect and if you do find a woman attractive, respectfully tell her so. If she is bitchy to you, walk away or be sassy back. Simple. Don't be like "Yeah and you look like an abortion" Or "I dont want your saggy titties" or whatever the hell some of you guys say. It take a big man to walk away.

3) You give up way too easy and you are weak

Now a lot of women have complained that guys run away when a girl so much has an opinion or might be smarter than them, or better paid than them... WHAT?!

Some guys expect a woman to just shut up and sit there and look pretty. No, not going to happen. I am not endorsing radical feminist views but I do endorse equality. Not special treatment, but equality.

I myself have been seen as intimidating and guys are scared to ask me out. I am not ugly, but apparently I am intimidating. Well that is ok, this is to filter out the weaklings like this fellow. Behave confidently and rid yourself of your petty insecurities when you’re around her. Women are drawn to strength. You don’t have to overpower her or be a superhero, but being able to stand your ground on something you believe in or being able to chime in in a good debate will gain her respect.

If your woman is strong, that is ok. She chose to be with you. Don't just leave her. Mind you she will do extremely fine without you anyway.

So, how do we counteract this?

1) Be strong. Know what you want. Make an effort.

Have ambition. Think ten steps ahead. I have the most mind blowing crush on my boss. Not because he is hot. He is like a 6 out of 10. But his mind and his willpower is extremely attractive to me and he knows what he wants and how to get it. I have a very strong personality and can outshine you as I am competitive. My boss will NOT let me undermine him in the slightest. He has been consistent. Now I am putty in his hands. Not saying that you need a six- figure salary, but try hard in everything you do.

YEAH YOU'RE WELCOME LADIES!!

2) Be honest with her EVERY SINGLE TIME.

It is inevitable. We have lie detectors implanted into our heads. We know if you are lying nearly every time. We make the best detectives. We know if you are playing around. Even if we don't know at first, believe me we will find out. But not just in terms of loyalty, in terms of everything. Be honest.

3) Treat her like how you would want men to treat your sister and/or mother and/ or any female you would love who is close to you.

Need I say more? Be a gentleman. Not a pig.

4) Kindness is key

There is nothing wrong with kindness. I don't know who the hell told you that if you are kind to a woman, she will kick you when you are down. No, we aren't succubus monsters. If she is going to be like that, who cares about that clown? Move on. A beautiful angel will fall for you one day. Be kind in everything you do. We women would rather be single than be with a psycho who hits us everyday. Look how sexy this guy is.

So there you go men. Put your best foot forward, be the best man you can be. Be the man that every woman would claw another woman's eyes out to be with.

Don't punish every woman because you had a bad experience with a few. Not all of us are like that. Just like how you don't want women to punish all men for one man's mistake, you shouldn't do the same. Don't be angry and bitter if something doesn't work out. It will soon <3

[Anonymous]

I am very disappointed in this take. This was nothing more than telling women what they want to believe. Without actually putting any thought into it at all.

It seems that every woman claims that when things don't work out it is because the guy is intimidated. It really shows how clueless she is about the own flaws. If she isn't making the guy feel comfortable and accepted, then she is the one that needs to change how she acts. Both genders have to make an effort to make the other one feel accepted or the relationship will fail. More often than not this is about the woman lacking good social skills.

Yes guys can get intimidated, but most guys that easily intimidated never would have approached her in the first place. Most of the time it is because the woman lacks good social skills, and makes the guy feel like she doesn't respect him or see him as an equal. No self respecting woman would put up with that, and it has nothing to do with her being intimidated. It is the same with guys.

Assuming a guy does leave you because he is intimidated that means he rejected you, not the other way around. Therefore if you respect him or not won't mean anything to him at that point, because he will have already moved on. Therefore using the excuse that he is at fault for being intimidated is just a way to avoid accepting you got rejected by placing the blame on him instead of yourself.

As soon as a woman makes the claim she intimidates men, most guys instantly lose respect for her. Why? It is because this shows just how little self awareness she has about her own actions and instead just wants to place the blame for all of her past failed relationships on men. This is typically from women with such bad social skills they don't understand there is a difference between having an opinion, and starting an argument. I don't know any guy that wants a woman so weak that she has no opinion. This is not attractive

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXfLEoCMO3c

The idea that a guys gives up too soon is also bullshit. If a woman is interested she will let the guy know right away. When the guy doesn't give up, then the woman gets upset that the guy can't take a hint. Just because the guy moves on and finds a woman willing to treat him with the same level of interest does not make him look weak. That is about him moving on and trying to find a compatible partner without wasting his time on a woman that doesn't treat him like she wants him around.

[Starfishlover]

Ok maybe you are right... I shouldn't have put the 'I'm intimidating' comment in. But that is mainly what a lot of guys tell me. Whether they are lying, I don't know. Hopefully I am not intimidating. I wrote an article that attacks the females too. I am not perfect. I was just giving a few theories as to why some men can't get a girlfriend. But thank you for your insight.

[Opinion Owner]

I know you wrote an article about females. It was a better article than this one, which is why I was disappointed with this article. I simply expected you to write a better article than this one.

If you had instead talked about the various traits women respect such as men that are independent, educated, not being afraid of taking risks to follow their goals, not being afraid to stand up for himself if she crosses a line and mistreats him, or similar other traits then this article would have been far better as it would actually instruct men on how to become the kind of man women do respect.

Instead it just basically makes vague accusations about men acting like pigs, or not being confident enough to handle a strong woman. At best that makes this article useless. I am sure if you really thought about it, you could write a much better article.

[Opinion Owner]

While you did touch on the subject of a man being strong, pretty much everything else you wrote stood in contrast to that message. As it is written now, you make the weak doormats that follow after women like a lost puppy even after being rejected, sound like a woman's dream guy. Women don't respect guys that act like that.

[Starfishlover]

I wrote about how men are pigs because some of them (and I quote "SOME") say disgusting things to us.

[Opinion Owner]

I am not arguing with you. I am just saying that it isn't helpful to bring that up. A guy that acts like that doesn't care if you respect him or not, because he clearly has no respect for you either. As for guys that are genuinely interested in learning what they are doing wrong to earn a woman's respect, this article isn't nearly as helpful as the one you wrote for women.

Yes you criticized women in that article as well, but your criticisms actually lead to more helpful advise. Such as showing that they respect themselves. The advise in this mytake just isn't helpful at all. It is just a list of complaints often that contradict themselves. Don't lie, but be kind. A lot of the lies guys tell is because he is trying to be kind. Any guy that never lies isn't going to be seen as kind. Instead he is going to be seen as an insensitive person and we all know it. Very few people man or woman can handle 100% honesty at all times.

[Opinion Owner]

I am not upset about you "attacking men" or whatever. I am just disappointed because I was hoping for a better mytake after reading the one you wrote for women. This mytake just isn't your best work.

[JohnBhoy94]

I candidly agree with you Anon... I was in hysterics reading this take.

[gwenlota2442]

You know. This is just a simple house wife's opinion. But It sounds like you being a self defined "strong woman" is really you just being kinda, bitchy. Ever think that maybe the problem is you? You may be looking for the perfect guy but are you sure that you deserve the perfect guy? Maybe try taking a look at yourself and see if you need to fix anything before going around and saying what it takes to be a good man.

[Starfishlover]

You dobt know me. .. maybe you are a simple housewife but I am the complete opposite to bitchy.

[gwenlota2442]

you're right. I don't know you. so I made an assessment on what you wrote on this article.

[LiveFreeorDieHard]

Damn hit the floor bullets are flying everywhere lol.

[JohnBhoy94]

#shotsfired #takecover

[Starfishlover]

Her bullets are just toy darts.

[gwenlota2442]

toy darts? bullets?

[JohnBelluci]

Looks like gwen has her feet touching the ground, unlike the MyTake author...

[genuinlysensitive]

Now this is a good mytake!

[thetundrawolf]

Just read your profile, good on you both. I am happy in spirit to hear about an honorable woman and an honorable man who waited for marriage. It is so rare, but look at you. May God bless you both and richly bless your relationship as you grow older, learn from one another, learn about one another, and fall deeper and deeper in love with each other.

[hellionthesage]

1) I personally have seen men put far more effort into a relationship then women. They ask her out, plan the date (to her preferences), pay for the date, chauffer her to the locations, etc. Then they buy flowers and jewelry, continue to plan all the dates etc. I have experienced this and every guy I have spoken too (when this topic comes up) has acknowledged this. Its true that men can and do get lazy in a relationship however they are the ones who are expected to put forth far more effort into it to begin with. We did these things, historicly, because the women would do the cooking and cleaning etc. Now, men are expected to do that as well. So I think that if the man is getting lazy maybe its a little less one sided then your presenting it.
2) I would concurr that catcalling is not particularly flattering. However it works, its why they try it. As I have read on here, a man heard a woman get catcalled and looked around to see an attractive women slink up (his words) to the car and start flirting with the guy, as he put it he knew that the same woman would have claimed it was sexist and inappropriate, if the car had not been expensive and the man doing the cat calling wasn't as attractive as he was. If it works even infrequently men will try it, it takes little to no effort on there part which makes it very usefull if you don't want to invest a lot of time and energy. Acting rude when rejected however is always inappropriate and I would agree that they should just move on without being petty.
3) I have never met a man who wanted a woman to sit there and look pretty. One of the (many) reasons I broke up with my ex was because she refused to have an opinion on anything. I have never heard this and must conclude that perhaps this is a justification. If a man gets rejected multiple times he assumes that it must be something he is doing. You have just acknowledged that despite not being approached or what have you multiple times that it must be his fault, some kind of deep seated character flaw of his and in no way could it possibly be you because your attactive smart and strongf etc. This is narcassism bordering on solipsism. There is a big diffrence between being intelligent and opinionated, and being obstinate and recalcitrant. If you believe that your opinion is right purely because its your opinion then that will always put off anybody, man or woman, especially if they where considering you as a potential romantic partner.

[hellionthesage]

4) your solution to this problem was, well, not much of a solution. You are basicly stating that its all mens fault and they need to be better and try harder to please you because obviousley it couldn't be you or any other womans actions that turn men off and make them not want to be around you. Notice how when you speak of women in this take it is always in the positive yet every part that is about men is an accusation or an attempt to shame men into a certain behavior. Even when reffering to yourself you are writing about you like your gods gift to the world, same for your profile. Its just a list of why your so much better then others, ironicly you mention humility in it yet I have seen none of that in this take or your profile page. This may be why guys are "intimidated" by you. Its not intimidation its ego. No one wants to be around someone that full of them selves. This take is only really usefull in highlighting why guys don't like certain women.

[GamerArtNerd]

1.) You say everything is a team effort. It may come as a shock to you but that is advice that women should take themselves. Women expect men to put in 90% of the effort. I see girls on GAG day after day complaining about how they've never had a boyfriend and when I ask them "Have you ever approached a guy?" they act as if I'm speaking a foreign language to them
2.) 100% agreed, no complaints
3.) You may not realize this but some guys are just naturally shy, just like some girls are. You don't realize how easy women have it, even the shyest, weakest, most antisocial girls in the world still have guys chasing them. Being strong and confident isn't always easy, especially when you're shy or have been rejected multiple times before. Men are humans too. Not to mention, some girls will pretend they aren't interested even when they are just to see if you'll "put effort." it's hard to tell which ones want you or not.
1.) I can agree to that but just like I said in #1, that goes both ways. It shouldn't always be the man who is thinking ahead and discovering new ideas. It should be a mutual, team effort always. Women have strived for equality and they finally got it but only where they want it. In the dating game, they still have the power that they've always had.
2.) Being honest is something I truly value and I am always honest but I find that time and time again with women there is no right answer. Honesty hurts them and lying hurts them. Just look at all the responses and results to this poll I asked a while back: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1587268-would-you-be-insulted-if-your-lover-told-you-you-were-a-6-5-10-also
3.) I agree completely
4.) Kindess is again, something I truly value and I'm always very kind but I've heard time and time again that girls don't like when a guy is "too kind" because it makes it "too easy" and they think he's fake.
When it all comes down to it, the dating game consists of men doing upwards of 90% of the effort in initiating things and that is why there are so many desperate creeps out there because not everyone has that ability. If women were as straightforward and ambitious as men then there would be a lot more happy couples out there.

[Anonymous]

I'm not disagreeing I think most of what is being said is good advice. But I feel the need to say there's a lot that has been glossed over.
1. Of course it's a team effort if more than one person is involved it always takes a team effort. Not much to say about this one.
2. Once again of course. Men aren't oblivious to the fact that women don't like all thier viewpoints. However, these guys that hold disgusting views about women simply don't care that you don't like thier views. So the advice is kind of circular. Men who don't care about impressing women should be expected to change thier views to attract those same women?
3. Reread the beginning of this one and you'll see the problem. I've never met a man who's left a girl for the reasons you listed I have however met plenty of women that claim that's why. In addition don't invalidate people's feelings by telling them to rid themselves of insecurities. Insecurities exist because we aren't born perfect it takes time for people to get over fears and making them feel bad about having those fears because you want something is a little unnecessary. But this is more about your wording than your ideas.

Then on the building side
1. Be more specific on this one. Ambition isn't that sexy when you don't admire what a person is ambitious about.
2. No. I know you want this and you may be a very strong women but many women hold very strong insecurities and sometimes as a guy the best skill to have is to know when to avoid hitting those buzzers. I'm not saying lie but complete honesty is not always the best policy you also need tact.
3. Yes. I agree. With the addition of being affectionate and passionate of course. Problem with this however is just like girls with daddy issues not every guy has the best examples in his life of what a good women is like and how he should treat her. It's not innate.
4. this is idealic. I agree kindness is important but don't put women on a pedestal. Most men who are bitter have at some point in their life fealt as if their kindness has been taken advantage of. I would advice men to be kind but not for the sake of attracting women and maintaining a relationship. Kindness should be done for yourself when it's done for reward it usually leads to disappointment.

Good mytake though. I enjoyed it.

[SilenRose]

Oh, great feedback. 👍

[Anonymous]

Number 1 and 2 I agree with.

2) "You have the most disgusting ideas about women" Guys can say some disgusting shit. I like the picture you added because now I envision that when I think about the hurtful stuff guys say to women. Typically they say that stuff because they themselves are hurt so they try to hurt her in the process. Usually I think guys come up with bad ideas about women by just not being around them much. The more they are around them the more they will understand that some of these beliefs are lies.

1) "You don't put in enough effort" The effort thing I guess I lack but not in a way you may think. I think maybe I don't lack effort, but that I'm just laid back. This may be a problem as some women may not be able to tell the difference.

www.quickmeme.com/.../...04b2294fb490ba4ca8b23.jpg

I'm quiet. I like to chill out. I like doing things too, but I'm not very flamboyant. Some women want that and if that's what they want then fine okay. That doesn't mean I lack effort though. I am loyal and trustworthy and if I say I'm going to do something I do.

3) "You give up way too easy and you are weak" You say men should be confident... well that guy in the picture even if physically he's weak he seems confident to me. Bad picture. I don't think it's about confidence. I'm a shy guy and yet girls still draw to me. I think it's a matter of being confident in how you are. Not so much being outspoken and loud, but yeah like you said standing firm in what you believe in. That doesn't mean getting rid of insecurities though. You're going to have those. Women have those. Why don't they get rid of theirs first? You then mention something about being asked out. Do you ever ask guys out? I don't ask out many girls. I don't feel I need to. I'm confident in that I feel if a girl wants me she should come to me. Not vice versa just because she's a woman. I like that you mention a good debate is good. I agree. Disagreements are important. You're not going to agree on everything. That's understandable.

4) "Be strong. Know what you want. Make an effort." This is kind of all of what you've been saying. "Now I am putty in his hands."

i0.kym-cdn.com/.../Wat8.jpg?1315930535

I mean I agree you should have goals and dreams, but I think humans just in general should. Not just men. Still I didn't understand the putty thing.

[Opinion Owner]

5) "Be honest with her EVERY SINGLE TIME." Oh I agree. 1000% with this one. I think both should be honest with each other. Though women tend to be better at lying then men. Maybe that's why they are so good at telling if a guy's lying? Either way I try to be honest as possible. However, that can backfire. If we are too honest you might not like what we have to say. For example: A girl might say she doesn't like her body. I might say "Well it's sexy as fuck to me. You have a nice ass." Said girl might get upset, but is that not honesty? Isn't that what you want?

Lol.

bg0lden.files.wordpress.com/.../...us-laughing.jpg

3)... and 4) "Treat her like how you would want men to treat your sister and/or mother and/ or any female you would love who is close to you." The last two are pretty much the same thing. I agree though. You mentioned something about hitting a woman. That's not a man. That's a fuck boy (unless she hit first). That's not a matter of kindness that's a matter of inhumane.

[Humping_Tornadoes]

Well said, man.

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks bro.

[RexCatholicissimus]

I don't really understand your mentality if I'm honest.

You're saying you want men to treat you well because they're not matching your standard, yet you're also pedestalizing yourself, both sexually and socially, with words like "magical" as well as generalizing that "yes, you want to have sex with us" as though men are dogs that you're graciously giving time to? Well that's very noble of you, honestly. Also, men aren't allowed to insult a woman who acts like a bitch towards them, because if they do then they're... Lesser men? As in, how dare he knock down the ego of the higher being known as an "attractive woman"?

I don't catcall girls, I've never fucking done it, yet I've still met bitchy women that have given me shit for human mistakes like accidentally bumping into them in a crowded area. Women shouldn't get a free pass for being bitchy and nobody should have to take someone being an asshole to you because they have some kind of superiority complex.

This is probably the vainest MyTake I think I've ever seen someone type on this site so far, and that really is an accomplishment. If you think you've helped ANY guys with this, you haven't. You've just come off as someone who recently had a bad experience and seriously needed to vent, whilst surreptitiously acting like you're just being "blunt" or "honest."

How you got an Editor position on this site is beyond me. Fuck, you didn't even proofread it correctly.

[PippiL]

I think a better title for this would be "how to appeal to the greatest number of women." I saw a similar article once only it was written for women, by a man. It said women should avoid extreme hairstyles, do their makeup in one single specific way, be moderately career driven, funny and smart (but not excessively, lest they overpower their boyfriends) and a million other things. By the time I was done reading it, I was pissed. Not because it wasn't true (statistically speaking, you will attract MORE men by doing those things) but because I felt like the author was trying to stuff all women into the same mold. People are people--they have vastly different experiences and personalities. Not all men are career driven alpha males who are also miraculously kind and sensitive to the feelings of women. They, like women, are a mixture of good and bad qualities. People don't have to be perfect to be loved--they just have to find someone who loves them for who they are and try to be the best that they can be.

[sxphs]

Amen.

[mangaka92]

The irony of so many women wanting this idealized male figure while demanding that they be treated like royalty and accepted "for who they are" without being expected to reach for the same high standards they place on men.
I don't agree with 3.) for sure. Just because a guy doesn't like a girl that is "smarter" than him or paid better than him does NOT make him weak. That's your own disillusion. There are many reasons for guys not wanting women that are smarter and paid better and there are many reasons for guys actually wanting women that are smarter and paid better than them. You cannot make generalizations like that especially when it just comes down to preference. You can't trash talk guys just because they have their own standards just as you have demonstrated that you have your own, as well, by making this post.
And with 2.) and being honest all the time, it's kind of hypocritical. I've met very few women that are actually honest about what they want. It's always a guessing game of trying to figure out what they actually want instead of just being honest with me every single time. If a girl says "fine" when I ask her how she's doing and she's actually not doing well, then she just lied to me. It usually takes several times of asking before she'll say anything. In the mean time, she's just lied to me several times about how she is. A healthy relationship is one where BOTH people are honest and don't need to fabricate how they're really feeling. And only the "psycho, possessive girlfriend" makes the best detective.

[genuinlysensitive]

This should be a my take.

[Ozanne]

Oh my dear "I'm going to lose a lot of friends for this" LOL!! You are only losing the people who don't understand what it takes to be a good guy to a woman, and refuse to look at themselves and find out what might need improving. So go ahead and lose the dead weight on this site. :) Guys have all the freedom to make a myTake about women not being respected or being girlfriend material (and they have), so it's all fair play on this site. I have posted enough in questions and myTakes about this same thing and get the same cry babies who say, "Waaa waaa no it's about money!" How about 'no, it's about your shitty personality that needs fixing?' Those who get it, get it. I am just sorry that you didn't check off the option to not allow anonymous posts because look at all the Anonymous guy-cry-babies who reject everything that has to do with treating a woman with love and respect all protecting their GaG usernames. People are people and notice when the opposite sex is interested and genuine - from there, feelings for the person can develop then maintenance of the relationship is expected from both sides. Simple. Down vote this shit and it just shows how weak and unwilling you are to the very basics in relationships.

[BellePepper]

@Hughhefner Everyone has the right to be on this site regardless of age. Even children who think age and menopause are somehow insults.

[M_A_X]

Just going to point out that your argument is not logical at all and filled with bullcrap propaganda to get people to agree with you by manipulating their emotions and subtly pushing your point in there like your lack of logic somehow proves it~

[Ozanne]

Since when is being nice, showing your best side and making an effort a bad thing. Your response to this shows that you just want to put insurance on bad behaviour because you don't think people should be doing this - no matter what the gender. How would you like it if a woman you meet didn't follow any of these tips? This is a two-way street and common sense. If you like someone and you hope to impress them, then don't be an ass, that's the basics of it all, and that's what she pointed out in her Take and what I'm defending.

[KDA20]

I really like that take, I think you will gain friends rather than lose them with this.
(1) I agree with you a relationship is a team effort of equal support and respect. The phone thing just seems plain rude.
(2) Yes how you view women is a link to how you view yourself. Your point about how to treat a woman the way you want your mother/sister/daughter is well made.
(3) Yes self confidence is the key and women find it very attractive. A strong woman is a good ally not an opponent.
(4) What you say about kindness and honesty will stand up anywhere.
Maybe some guys have had knockbacks in life but they shouldn't let this colour their whole view of the female gender.
I was thinking about what you said about yourself, I don't find you intimidating -Forthright, confident and intelligent but they are traits to be respected not feared. You are beautiful with a great personality and some young guy is going to be very lucky to meet a formidable young woman like you. He will have the wherewithal to appreciate and respect you in equal measures.

[miserybusiness]

Sir, you've written the only rational and down to earth comment in this raging sea of male denial and bitterness. Good on you.

And I agree wholeheartedly.

[Lolomon]

I do agree with this BUT you where not honest 100 %. WAAY to easy on the men! Like women DONT respect men who have sex with anything with an opening, and if we know who you have had sex with its a turn off. Women dont respect assholes, guys who make fun of people, calling girsl fat, weird, guys losers, or gay like its an insult. Girls DONT respect a guy that compares her to people who to people who have had work done, NOONe can live up to plastic standards. Girls dont respect guys who break down her self esteem so she sticks around and doesn't think anyone else wants her. Girls DONT respect a guy who thinks she is his momma and will cook, clean for him. A Girl doesn't respect a man that thinks she will take care of him and she will pay for everything... so much more.

[gwenlota2442]

You do know why guys are attracted to a woman who cooks for him and acts like a mother would act right? its because when a woman acts like a mother, its showing him that she will make a good mother to his children. but the rest I agree with.

[heavensgift2girls]

Why wouldn't a guy respect a woman that cooks and cleans for him? There is nothing disrespectful about taking care of your loved ones. If a guy cooks and cleans for his woman does that mean she will stop respecting him? It sounds more like you hate the classic gender roles, and as a result have trouble respecting the people that choose to follow that path for themselves.

A housewife may or may not be compatible for some guys, but that doesn't mean we don't respect them. There is no difference in my levels of respect for women that choose to be a housewife, or the women that choose to have a career. As for the last line, I would have to agree. If she is doing everything, and getting nothing in return, then that shows weakness, and he will start to disrespect her.

[Starfishlover]

I could have added some of these.

[Lolomon]

There is a difference between cooking for your loved ones. BUT women take care of their husbands ALWAYS have. WHY do you think women always call their husbands one of their children. Im not referring to the couples who balance each other out, im talking about the woman who is supposed to work full time , run a house and if they have kids raise those too and then expect to give him some at night. There is a differnce between gender roles and roles of the sexes. Women being nurturers and taking care of the home is the norm of the sex of a female not gender. gender norm is a girl wearing a dress and makeup.

[gwenlota2442]

calm down feminist. why are you bringing all that into it? all I said was that a man is attracted to a women who cooks for him and acts like a good mother would act. when did I ever say anything about jobs, make up and dresses?

[Lolomon]

you say the word feminist like its an insult its not , very empowering actually. AND if you dont understand its cool, didn't expect you to

[JohnBhoy94]

"and if we know who you have had sex with its a turn off " ----- No, it makes YOU insecure.

"Girls dont respect guys who break down her self esteem so she sticks around and doesn't think anyone else wants her. " ----- Go say that to the millions of women trapped in abusive relationships.

"Girls DONT respect a guy who thinks she is his momma and will cook, clean for him." ----- Most guys don't think this way, you're coming across as sexist now.

[gwenlota2442]

why is it that anyone that disagrees with a feminism, the feminist response is always "you don't understand"? And whether someone sees the word feminist as an insult or not is a matter of opinion. but you can't really deny that being a feminist gives you a biased opinion.

[Lolomon]

Seriously, you guys are mad, why? the women here agree with me. get over it

[sdistotallyme]

yeah girls don't respect those kind of guys... but they do choose to sleep with them...

[gwenlota2442]

have you ever noticed that the women who agree with you on here sound like man haters? like they keep dating the douchbags and then think all men are like that. they agree with you because I'm sure most of them are single and just have a hate on for men. biased opinion's from single people who don't really know how to choose nor know how to act to get a good man. so for someone who keeps getting douchbags and losers, what makes you think you know what a man needs to act like to be a good mate? if anything its the women who have been happily married for 10 or something years with no signs of getting divorced that are the ones to ask what a girl should be looking for in a good man. not other single people who keep going for and attracting bad men.

[genuinlysensitive]

Lol, ever wonder why men dont respect you or think you're girlfriend material? Maybe it has something to do with the fact you hate them, think they are all alike tell them what they ate attracted to is "wrong" and that liking the simple fact that a woman has the necesary life skills of cooking and cleaning is wrong, and God forbid she actually pays for something, since we are equal, but somehow giys still need to pay for everything.

[genuinlysensitive]

@gwenlota2442, you have a very good insight to the male mind. Ladies, if you jave an open mind, you should listen to what she has to say.

[jestingdemon]

im not arguing or attacking this is just my honest opinion
some points are valid here some aren't.
I've always known what I want and how to get there but it's a bumpy road I've always just wanted someone by my side through it. Which was my first mistake.
I've always been strong but honest these don't go together in a relationship. Meaning if something is wrong and I'm asked about it I have to lie otherwise I'm weak.
If a girl doesn't trust me I'm gone there's no reason to stay if she can't give me the benefit of the doubt.
I'm kind
I help out
but I get walked on for it.
But aside from all that just remember the more pressure you put on him the less fun you'll have.
In my opinion the relationship can't stay good if all you have is pressure and stress.
Fun and heartwarming times should override all of these things. If you just want a person for high qualities you won't appreciate or even love that person.
Every body has potential for the things above but some of need help and to have fun along the way. I just think it takes a better person to actually step into their life and lend a helping hand. A good relationship=good teamwork.
Sorry that was so long.

[Anonymous]

How about I be me, you be you, and if one isn't feeling the other we can keep it moving? There's 7 billion people on this planet, whatever guy you can think of, whatever girl you can think of, they probably exist out there. So how about we stop with the checklist of what a person needs and just tell them to be themselves.

Being fake is the surest way to screw up. A person can only put up a charade for so long before it burns them out. That's why when the guy stops trying to meet your checklist things start to turn sideways. Would be better for him to be himself, and if it wasn't going to work, he found out from the get go.

Also, taking your writing as a whole, I get the vibe somebody hurt you pretty bad emotionally and you haven't dealt with it properly. Most people that end up toward any extreme usually do so because of damage, and you definitely fit the bill for the extreme independent type. Like you don't need anybody and your whole sense of pride is built on that independent "I don't need anybody" persona. You see who you are and pride, I see overcompensation.

As human beings, we're programmed to find a balance between independence and emotional connection (which causes dependence). That's who we are as social creatures. I get the vibe that somewhere along the line something happened that messed that balance up for you.

[TwistedLogic]

I think men and women are incompatible with the way society currently is. Women are swimming in an ocean full of misinformation, while men are lost in a cloud of misinformation. This take represents your ideas only, not the female perspective on things. The only way for both genders to start understanding one another is if they start communicating with each other. No bullshit, no drama, no cynicism, and no judgments. We must first stop the gender war and then we can expect something productive and positive to come along.

Mediocre take. 3/5.

[Botchie]

Man, you said it. I think that the girl who made this take is one of the actually outgoing girls who likes to put in a lot of effort and expects the same of her man/significant other. This being said (and correct me if I'm wrong) but a good majority of girls put in little to no effort at starting a relationship. The guy has to come up with the date idea, he has to ask her out, he is obligated (but not required) to pay for the first date AND ask for another date. I don't know about anyone else, but that seems like quite a bit of effort in my opinion.

As to her other points, there is such a thing as being too kind and too honest. So there has to be a balance of that. And what's most hilarious about this whole thing is the picture of the guy with a six pack. Because if getting into girls pants is what he wants and gets, it makes sense why girls find him sexy and help him get in their pants. Otherwise they don't notice guys getting what they want.

[TwistedLogic]

@Botchie Everything you wrote is true. The main problem is miscommunication. I look around me and I see the SAME relationship all over the place. Too many rules and expectations. This results in everyone trying to be someone else in order to land themselves a decent partner (both men and women). Then after a few months/years, most couples get to see the real face of their partner and then the arguments start. It is completely ignorant and pretentious, if you ask me.

[genuinlysensitive]

You are quite generous with your rating.

[Drast]

All together I liked the take but I have one thing to say. There is a big difference between being intimidated by a girl and deciding she's not worth your time. Too many girls fool themselves into thinking thier intimidating when in reality, it is not pragmatic to, and therefore not worth it to be with them. Asking to much for to little and so on. Of course it's easier to assume the man is weak or lazy instead of considering ones self, but that is besides the point. I'm not saying thier aren't women that intimidate men with thier intelligence or beauty, just that there are much fewer than most girls would like to believe.

[Anonymous]

60% true and 40% a bunch of bs. Men just need to respect a woman, be independent, dress nice when appropriate, eat right, excerise and have goals. I could have written this take much simplier. Making too many demands of a man to be like this and that is a turn off. I would be less likely to date a woman that demand me to be like this all the time. simple rule be yourself and do what you like. Every woman is different and attracted to different types of guys. I dated a girl that was so immature that she with a guy that only follows one of your criteria. Please explain that...

[Opinion Owner]

Every woman has a different criteria in a guy so you can't hold true to everything said in this article.

[vishna]

Well, I've never turned down a guy because he was weak... or skinny like the guy in the photo.

But I have turned down guys because I'm taken, their approach is disgusting, or their viewpoints are appalling.

Overall, I think this a good take. And what you have to say about how guys interact with us is spot on. Guys-be confident, treat us right, don't lie.

But I don't have a magical lie detector in my skull (my boyfriend is just really bad at lying like I am, haha) and I would never call someone a weakling for being scared to go hard after a girl, especially if I knew I was intimidating.

[Anonymous]

Fairly straight forward, if a little idealistic.

I mean, I've posted before how guys should avoid damaged women and the crazies like the plague. And yet all of your advice here stems from the assumption that the girl is sane and rational. (Not always the case.) So do you tacitly admit they should be avoided? Because I was slammed to high hell for suggesting that. "Crazy bitches need love too" or some such shit.

The guys you don't like - the guys who do sucky behaviour or hold sucky opinions on gender - they didn't just magically mutate themselves into existence. No 3 year old boy wanders the kindergartens of the world muttering "God damn bitches" to himself. They are made, more often than not, by women. But you never see women take responsibility for that, or try to argue "crazy guys need love too".

[dartmaul15]

the neverending sircle
Bad boy fucks over nice girl, creates bad girl
Bad girl fucks over nice guy, creates bad boy
Bad boy fucks over nice girl, creates...
Fuck it, you get my point.

No gender is better than the other, because neither have managed to break that sycle (even if it only takes one to break it)...

[milightman]

I agree 100% with the accountability aspect of this, but building a relationship takes two people, not one person. If a woman is going to be intentionally coy with me to make sure I make some "effort", instead of putting in effort of showing that she is interested and wants to get to know me as well, then I'm going to write her off as immature.

It takes two to build a relationship, it's not a one way street. But yes I do believe that a Man should be the time to be confident and hold his ground, but I don't agree that he's supposed to deal with all her manipulative "tests", he's not giving up, he's just a lot more mature than the girl and doesn't need that.

Woman need to put in effort as well, if they don't and expect a man to put in all the effort, then they shouldn't be looking for a relationship, because it sounds like they want a Dad

[Jakey_Bodge]

Well all my 3 sisters ages 20+ all go for men that beat them up, almost killed them etc... and later ask themselves out loud "Why can't I find the right man... What am I doing wrong"... Ok so whenever I see the guy they have with them I instantly know they are bad/prick/nobhead... And I say to my sisters "you chose wrong"... and they say back "No he's different, he's nice" two weeks later comes back home crying etc... Oh dear why do most women go for the retarded people that dont show there true selves and why do they go for the bad boys that mean trouble and especially fucking FUCKING WOMEN BEATERS... I give up now... Im just there like yup I cba to intervene its your life... RIP People that dont get chances due to women not fucking realizing that you mean business in terms of treating a women like a princess... Totes not trying to imply my life or anything Pffft cmon that would be silly...

[Bluemax]

Your sisters have problems and are not representative of all or even most women.

They need help, I think.

[thatkaruguy]

@Bluemax yeah they don't represent all women but they do represent a good number of them

[Bluemax]

@thatkaruguy
What percentage of women in America (assuming you're American) would you say they constitute?

[Anonymous]

Lol be yourself, be honest, be kind. Women avoid men like that, as the plague. Beleive me I know I posses all of those qualities,

As for the first part, typical woman. you're too macho you're a pig, followed immediately by, you're nice and treat me withrespect, YOU ARE WEAK. Why can't women actually be honest about what they want?

Also, the reason this isn't winning you any friends is because of the blatant sexism. Men have to put up with a womans bitchyness with a smile, but he does anything sje doesn't like and its somehow all his fault.

Let me tell YOU why men dont respect you and see YOU as girlfriend material. You think relationships are all about you, its his job to be your verbal, and possibly physical puncinng bag, with a smile, while being blamed for everything in your lifw you are unhappy with. In short you are a natcissistic bitch.

[CountVronsky]

Great opinion.

[pavlove]

lol... says be yourself in the first line... goes anon.

Dude, you're too freaking old for this crap.

[Opinion Owner]

Yes I was repeating what OP said. As for maturity, I would like to point out how immature it is to resort to personal attacks in any debate forum. If certain people would refrain from that, Im sure there would be much less people going anon.