Do you want to spend all your time with your girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

Guys, do you want to spend all of your free time with your girlfriend? Do you cancel all other plans if she calls?

My boyfriend of 4 months wants to spend all his free time with me. He said I am the first person that he wants to spend all of his time with. He said he can make plans with his friends but if I call, he would cancel all of them.

It is good that he is so much into me but sometimes it can get smothering. I don't know relationships very much. So I don't know if his feelings are healthy..

[kaister]

Well the key phrase in your question would be 4 months. I remember my first crush, heck I had throw away my food even if I barely started so I had go on a webcam chat with her lol! Quite desperate I was and ended up not getting her. Anyway back to your issue.

It's pretty obvious you are his first and he is over excited that is all. Commonly seen in most first time guys. Just I think assure him I guess. You know let him know, you aren't just going to ditch him like that. At least that's what was going on in my head for my first crush.

Was pathetically worried if I didn't respond immediately, I don't got any chance...really pathetic.

So I say help him to calm down a bit. Like you said it even gets smothering. This is what chases away girls from first timer guys. So tell him to take a step back and relax.

I think that should make help him.

Also spending all his time with you. Even if it feels great now and just slightly smothering. It will wreck things up for him mainly. His relationship with his friends and family would most likely deteriorate if he jumps to you the moment you ring a bell. Telling from experience.

So yea help him out. He is just excited you gave him a chance XD. Have fun you 2 love birds XD.

[Asker]

:)))

I am not his first though. He lived with his ex for almost a year before me

[kaister]

Hmm, not his first yet he clings like it is. Weird, well maybe it hasn't left his system yet. Doesn't really change what has to be done though. Good intentions but very unhealthy for him, you and others. Other than that. Have fun : )

[AnathemA381]

I'm gonna give you my personal opinion...

It doesn't matter what my relationship with a person is... A person can be my girlfriend, best friend, friend or acquaintance; no matter. If I want to spend time with a person over anyone else I may or may not have plans with, I will do it.

As for spending ALL my time with one person, my female best friend (on whom I have a huge crush on) will always be #1... Although she can't spend all her time with me, I go out of my way to be with her whenever she has free time!

So I guess it comes down to who's the most important person in my life at certain periods of time.

So I guess if you feel smothered you can tell him, because you're obviously important enough to him, so you can reach a kind of understanding I guess :)

Hope I helped! Peace out!

[abluerwhite]

No. I fell into that trap with my ex. I had other friends in college and basically always had to bring him because he dropped all his friends at school just so he could always be with me. When we broke up he told me he used to cancel plans with his friends so he could talk to me on the phone during the summer. It's not healthy. Stop it while you can.

[Anonymous]

It would be unhealthy in the long run. He needs to make time for his friends and family as well, so dropping everything just for you seems a bit clingy. And it sounds kind of mindless as well, to just throw everyone else aside for you. You should probably try to talk to him about it, especially if he starts expecting you to do the same for him.

[1995girl]

I wouldn't know, but what I do know is that spending all your time in the relationship part is unhealthy. When the two break up, it's going to be harder for them to move on since all their time spent was together

[raykid983]

It depends on how urgent the plans with her are. But I've been with my girlfriend for over 3 years and I probably enjoy spending time with her the most. BUT if you end up going on vacation or something he will implode. Make sure he doesn't alienate himself from his friends my continually making plans with your own, so he will have to make his own plans.

[gonyr]

I think it's really unhealthy if someone does. I have a life outside of my relationship. S does my girlfriend. Certainly he should want to spend time with you buthe shouldn't feel like he can't do things with friends.

Maybe because your relationship is still pretty new, he either feels like he has to, or is still feeling that "honey-moon" type phase.

[TouchTheSky]

He might not have good friends and this is the only reason he wants to spend all his time with you, my friends are very close to me we're like more than brothers and that's why I wouldn't cancel plans with my friends for my gilrfriend and the other way around.

[cavmanier]

It's not unhealthy. It's reasonable he would rather spend time with you than with friends. I bet if you two are together for awhile he'll become more interested in other things.

[Anonymous]

Do I want to spend all my free time with her? No of course not. I have a life.

Do I cancel all plans if she calls? Same answer. No of course not.

Sounds like he's making the same mistake most guys make in their first relationship.

[Asker]

The thing is I am not his first girlfriend. He was living together with his ex for 8 months. They broke up in December

[Anonymous]

Just saying, I'd discourage that. Eventually he'll alienate himself from his social circles and depend on you far too much. Encourage him to socialise with his mates, etc.

[ionhide]

well you should manage everything. I will spend some time but spend some time on other things as well

[asianfreak]

No, I'm gonna also want some time for myself or go out with family or friends at times under the right conditions. Staying at the same place with one person all the time is no fun, and it's neither helpful to you, nor helpful to your partner.

[Anonymous]

Hell no. My boyfriend and I enjoy each others' company, sure, but he doesn't want to see me 24/7. He doesn't cancel plans for me certainly and I don't for him.

[Anonymous]

no we both need our free time apart to spend time with friends and family apart, it's nice he wants to spend all his free time with you but you do need time apart to make the relationship healthy so you don't get fed up with each other.

[Anonymous]

No, I don't want to spend all my time with her. No I wouldn't cancel my plans for her (unless of course it's an emergency).

[Cosay]

No I don't want to.The only time I have canceled any plans is when its something really important.

[Anonymous]

No. She needs to get a job and move out.

[Anonymous]

I highly doubt they do