Age Difference? How old is too old?

Okay, guys and girls. At what age, would you say that someone is too old for you?

Just to give you an example: When I was 24, I started seeing a 39 year old woman. 15 years difference. I thought it was pretty cool that I was screwing a 39 year old woman. 14 years later, she and I are still together, but I'm not interested in carrying on the relationship because she has never wanted a family and I thought I could change that. She still doesn't and I do. She can't anymore.

I think it's alright for girls to date older guys, because guys can still provide a family at almost any age. Women have are in a time crunch.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Dude, you must have loved her to be with her that long. I'm 26 now, but when I was 24 I met a 40 year old online. The sex was amazing too and she still looks hot today but the relationship didn't last because she told me from the beginning that she couldn't have children. I told her I couldn't produce children either because of some stupid genetic disorder but anyways after she told me she didn't want children period, that was when we went our separate ways. I think I only went out with her for 10 months.

    So if you are 38 now then that means this woman is in her early 50s. Well if you really want to have children and this woman can't give you any or doesn't want them even if you adopted them then I suggest move on. If I was still with the older woman that I was with then I still would have left her eventually because I already know that I want to have a child even if I have to go out and adopt one. The only problem that I currently have is that adoption agencies in the United States don't want to give children to single parents. Which in my case SUCKS. So until I can find a girlfriend that is willing to adopt a child with me, I'm screwed and will never get to experience fatherhood.

    • Thanks. We've discussed other options such as surrogacy and adoption.

What Girls Said 8

  • I just turned 30 and am seeing a 21 year old guy. For a long time, men have dated younger girls so I think it is only fair that we women should get the same benefit. I work in a restaurant and any time some hot girl comes in the guys drool all over themselves even if she is really young (15, 16 ish) but when a guy comes in that is way hot and the girls look then the guys call us pervs. What the hell is the difference?

    As far as wanting a family, that is hard. Even with people the same age, some times the man doesn't want to have kids or vice versa. It is something every couple has to work out between themselves no matter what the age.

  • Well I personally think that (and this is after all schooling) that 10 years is the max age difference both ways. But then again if you fall in love with someone then nothing matters. I think you should give up this particular relationship. Having a family is obviously important to you. You should not be denied the chance to have your own.

  • Ohhhh no... not good going from the older lady to the younger, not good at all... maybe consider what you are looking for before you become sucked into the youthful thing.

  • There is definitely nothing wrong with dating an older woman. I think its great that the tables are turned, the only thing that is creepy is when a 45 year old man wants to date a 17 year old. Or vice a versa. I think if you are attracted to someone and there is common ground then why not. Its not about age anyways.

    If you are really wanting a family and you have been with her for so long, I think you owe it to her to discuss your concerns. If you really want a family and she can't/doesn't, then you need to talk about the possibility of breaking up. Let her have some say.

    • Well, the situation I'm in with my girlfriend is only only one side of the story. The other side is that a 21 year old girl has been flirting with me and I have been wanting to pursue it, but I'm not wanting to start something while I'm deep into something else. I know I need to end the first relationship first.

  • I was liking the question until I got to the last line, haha. True guys can create a family at any age. But can they care for that family and is it fair to the kids if their 'old man' is too old to play catch with them,get up early for school, etc? Anyways back on topic.

    I'm 21 years old and I tend to like older men. I've been with guys from the age of 22 through 42. Mind you, I have not let things heat up with all of these guys. Personally, I prefer a guy who is late 20s to early 30s. I can be attracted to guys older than that easily. But if there is too large of an age gap people start to look at you funny and you also question whether you should be spending the best years of your life with someone who's already had them, etc. I also don't date guys who are too much older because they are probably only looking for a young gal to mess around with and make them feel good about themselves.

    The family issue is also a big thing, and if it gets too serious I run for the hills.

  • Hello,

    I agree that women have a time issue, but I think the bigger issue for you is that she did not want to have a family and you did. I am currently dating a man that is 25 and we have been together for almost a year and a half. He does want children but he has an agenda in which he wishes to follow. If he follows his agenda I will not be able to give him children. We have discussed this on several occasions and he has decided that he is willing to push his time line forward a little so that we can have children together. There has to be a compromise in situations like this. The problem you are having could have very well happened with someone your own age.

  • I prefer to date someone within 5 years of me.

  • i started seeing an 18 year old man. he acts more mature than a lot of men my age. I'm 38. he is an awesome person, but I think his family and friends want to "protect him" from me. we both just want to have fun. I think he is the bomb and he thinks I'm very sexy. I think it would be great for a while.


What Guys Said 3

  • I'm 19 but I would date a girl in her 30's or early 40's. That's not my preference but if she was that hot then-----

  • Go for it!