Some parents say that if you become a good person, you will get good things. What if we get bad things? Does it show that we are bad people?
Just-world hypothesis
According to just-world hypothesis; bad things happen to bad people and good things happen to good people.
Sometimes we apply that hypothesis into our life. How? When a bad thing happens in our life, we only blame ourselves.
I guess I am not a good person.
Sometimes it is not you
But we don't think according to this hypothesis when good things happen in our lives. Imagine that you have a happy relationship. Everything goes well and one day you learn that you have been cheated on. You start to think like "Where did I do wrong!". You question yourself.
Let's take a look to another example. You are weighing 5kg of apples but every time you weigh them, the scale shows 3kg. You think like "Where did I do wrong?". But you forget to think about the fact that the scale may be broken down.
Bad things don't happen just because of us. People do bad to us it doesn't matter how good we are. We can't control everything in our life. Some things are out of our control. Sometimes it doesn't matter how much you want something and work for it, you can't get it. Accept that fact. Accept the fact that not everything is under our control.
But that also doesn't mean that you should always blame others for bad things in your life. Just keep in mind that it is not always because of you.
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