Reasons to never take an EX back

I hear about people trying to get back with their EX every single day. I really wish it was an understatement but its true. so im here to state the (obvious) reasons as why you should not get back with your ex.

1. The trust has been shattered

Trust is of course an incredibly important thing in a relationship. It's difficult to construct from the beginning and is even more difficult to try to put back togethere once the trust has been broken. Do you really want to be in a relationship where the trust is now lacking and you’re never sure that your partner won't turn and run from you?

2. There is billions of other fish in the sea

This is probly one of the last things you want to hear just after a break up, but it is true. There is plenty of other fish in the sea. I know it might seem like the entire world has been trimmed down into it just being you and your EX. But the truth is that there are so many other people that you can create new stories with. And perhaps eventually go through a breakup with. And while it may seem daunting, to have to find someone with whom to start all over again and possibly end up crashing and burning like before, it also holds so much hope. There are uncharted paths of people with whom you don’t necessarily fight over everything, with whom things just click, with whom you can just be yourself and possibly not have to deal with a breakup of any kind. And even if you don’t meet the person of your dreams, at least you tried. You tried, and it didn’t involve sulking back to your ex for what you already know doesn’t work. There is so many potential lovers out there and they are increasing daily, in other words, there are more and more people for you to fall in love with, and its getting easier and easier to meet these new people. Please dont settle down with an ex cause you dont think there is someone else out there for you. Believe me, there is.

3. It ended for a reason

It's kinda easy to look back at a past relationship a few weeks after it has ended and see nothing but romance and perfection. You guys probly had some things worth smiling about, but you need to ignore that stuff to remember that it actually did end for a reason. It's easy to just look back at the good things that happened, but you need to push that stuff away no matter how mutch it might hurt to do so, and actually think of why it did end.

4. You're just attacked

The reality is that no one likes to be wrong. There's no one in this world who likes to feel like all the time and energy you invested in a relationship was just a waste. We all want to feel validated in the feelings we though we had for a certain person and that is hard to do when we are faced with the relationship being over. So many times our desire to take that ex back isn’t because we are really “in love” with them. It is simply our way of holding on to the hope that we didn’t get this wrong. That we didn’t just fight all this time to get and keep this relationship when in reality that person was never meant for us to begin with. Fear motivates us more then love most of the time and for the most of us. In some cases its just lust that reels us back in.

And last of all ladies and gentlemen; never bother to take a person back after things ended. You are only setting yourself up for you or them to leave again. Some people (most people actually) don’t realise what they had until its gone. But that doesn’t not always mean they are supposed to get it back. Your ex is an ex for a reason. Taking the time to truly understand those reasons will make it clearer if you should entertain getting back with the. Stop getting caught up in what you think you want and focus on what you really need. Regardless of what you decide to do forgiveness will still be needed. Because without forgiveness which allows for you to heal, your next significant other will simply become your next ex.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I agree and disagree... if the relationship ended badly.. then I think there's no way of making it work.. but if the relationship ended peacefully and it wasn't a serious reason for it to end.. then I think it could work.. I've seen plenty of people breakup and then get back together, make the relationship even better..

    but I've also seen the opposite happen... I do think relationships end for a reason.. but I don't think it automatically means the person isn't right for you.. It could be right person/wrong time.. or trying to deal with a relationship at a stressful period in your life.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Taking an ex back is like putting something out on a yard sale, and then buying all your shit back.

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What Guys Said 14

  • I seen you pretty much block someone who said they disagree with you then told them to get help... So your saying everything you say is 100% true? No it's not yea a ex is a ex for a reason but most of you who do get heart break after taking a ex back is because the next day you take the. Back or 3-5 months later after the new girl or guy dumps them you take them back. I know a lot of people who have taken a ex back after 1-2 years of no contract that are not doing 100% better or even got married. I dont know if u had a guy break your heart really bad or what but you have the right too your opinion and shouldn't block people for disagreing with you. And too anyway that took a ex back that got cheated on maybe its because you didn't learn from your past mistakes with him or her or because you took a cheated back which is a no no.

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    • No. Youve got it wrong. I block people when they are starting to tell me that I've tried stating that this is how things are. I also block people when they are telling me that these are my opnions cause of my religion or how i grew up. These are sickening things to be accused of. This take, this take are just my own opnion. And i know that people dont agree with it, which is fine. Cause people dont always agree with eachothers opnions.

    • Sorry for jumping the guy there then I guest she pm you some message or I didn'tsee everything. But I just belive you should never take back a cheater or someone who lefted you for someone else. While this may seem like common knowledge I meet people everytday that take back a cheater or someone who dumped them from someone else. Are lastly someone who dumps them with out saying why they are leaving you. I won't bore you with details but enjoy your day

  • Marry me, please 💍😁

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    • Ofc 💕👌🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

  • It all depends on why and how you broke up but for the most part an x is an x for a legitimate reason.

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  • 5. Sex would suck
    I mean literally you are screwing the thing that you used to love... all until you two broke up. She/he without a doubt screwed some other person in that time you were apart. Sex will without a doubt suck especially when you find out it was your bff/best friend screwing her/him.

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    • I would not feel comfortable giving him oral or raw after a break up. Because I would know he's a man whore

  • After she's had some time to learn from her mistakes, if the relationship ended cordially, I'd consider giving her another chance.

    If, however, she left me feeling that a sword fight with her to the death - just a few hundred feet from an erupting volcano - and dropping her in the lava flow if I win - would make me feel better than reconciling, then there's no way I'd take her back.

    I can pardon stupid friends. It's a lot harder to pardon mortal enemies.

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  • It all boils down to, why did you break up in the first place and is that factor still the case.

    I have several exes that we broke up on good terms. Broke up because of immaturity, we've both since matured.
    Broke up because of bad timing.
    The timing is good now.
    Broke up because couldn't handle long distance any longer. I'm moving to the same town.

    Now if you broke up because he's an asshole... and he's still an asshole.. maybe you shouldn't take him back lol

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  • I agree with your MyTake thank you so much for sharing :D :)

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  • Depends how you see it

    Sometimes its more about timing... sometimes you dated your soul mate BUT the timing is wrong... your lives are not coinciding.. so you separate BUT then years again somehow you meet snd now your married and realized you were always soul mates

    I've seen this with about 2 couples i know, married after 15 years of breaking up and so happy now

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  • Dating your ex usually ends in the worst way possible: a house, kids and marriage and even sharing bank accounts.
    I should know because my mother and father dated their ex and now they're married to each other.

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  • As an alpha male, most of my exes would be privileged with the opportunity for me to take them back. There is no need for trust anyway because I rarely establish rapport and the only sexual boundaries are related to the female's loyalty, not my own.

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  • This is a good post; it has a lot of truth in it. Why would you want to go back to something that already has a history of not working out?

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  • what if there are reasons you have to stay together?

    1. what if you both live under the same house (and cannot move out due to financial reasons)?

    2. what if you both are on a team at work or university classes?

    3. what if you 2 hang in the same social groups?

    4. what if you graduated college and have a hard time meeting people your age or slightly younger/older? how'll you find a replacement?

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  • You have to take each breakup as a case by case basis. In rare occasions you are meant to get back together, but I agree that in many and possibly most cases you're not.

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  • they may have an STD

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What Girls Said 12

  • I can't say that I agree fully with this take. People change all the time, maybe they just needed to take a break from the relationship, maybe they just needed some time alone to get their stuff together... either way if things are going along great between the person and the ex and they both feel comfortable being in a relationship again then they should get back together and clear the platter from last time...

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    • Blergh. Why read a take to then just comment like this?

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    • Kinda how I feel about the matter. I'm not sure what the original posters issue is. Its a free country and we all have the right to share our opinions.

    • @Soshy depending on what country you're from...

  • that cookie looks really yummy! mmmmm

    people change. time apart is all a couple really needed sometimes.

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  • true take! the relationship ended for a reason... why get back?

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  • My sister "took back" an ex and now they've been married for 6 years... But I guess every rule has its exceptions.

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    • Hey, these are just my opnions. Im happy for your sister and i realise now after this has been posted for a while that i should have added that it actually can work out if you chose to take an ex back.

  • I just changed my number. Everytime I heard my phone go off, I had hoped it would be him. It was torture so I changed my phone number. Now I'll never know if he contacted me or if he decided to let go. It's better for me

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  • Love it! How can I favorite this take? 😊

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  • I've came to the conclusion that it's not me.. it's him

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  • The only case I would say it's OK is if you left for distance or other reasons beyond your control. Like if you left the state for college or work and end up seeing each other again in 5, 10 years.

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    • Thats a good point. But i probly wouldn't do it after so many years.

    • No but I suppose it's just that... I suppose I'm hoping if i have to leave my boyfriend to go to Brooklyn next year I would be able to find him again...

      That and also you have to admit those highschool sweethearts reuniting stories or lovers separated by war funding each other 30 years later absolutely can hit you in the feels

  • Preach. These points are SO true! I have actually told some of my friends the same things when they are bein tempted into getting back with an ex

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  • I disagree

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    • Dont care. This isn't about whats more right or wrong. This is just my personal opinions.

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    • Have *

    • Please look for help. Until then im blocking you.

  • My thoughts exactly great take.

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  • Same garbage, different day.

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