I understand with every situation there's different circumstances for both men and women and reasons for leaving or staying or leaving their kids behind or letting them go. but I've also watched men, especially men, get the shaft. I watched a man go into a courthouse to subpoena his ex for visitation with the kids and to get the eighteen-year-old dropped off of the support and the women in the courthouse we're so smug to him until they realized what he was there for and that he had been doing the right thing all these years. they just looked at him and assumed that he was one that didn't "want" to pay his child support. Im beside myself with the way the courts make assumptions about fathers of children. not all women are good mothers and not all men are bad fathers. but that's what society tells us. at the end of the day nobody's perfect but we should definitely give more praise to those who do what they're supposed to do or take on more than they need to or have to. and remember who's going to be the ones to suffer the most through all of this it's always the kids and then they do the same things it's a vicious cycle because they don't know any better that's what they were taught some get out of it what they should and realize what happened and would never do that to their kids but not everybody. what is it that makes society bag on men in general?
The topic of child care and Support came up today between my guy (of 9 years) and I. I find it absolutely unexceptable for a majority of women that have children can take them away from a living, caring, father that works himself to death to provide for them (I know some don't do shit for their kids, and they give bad names to the ones that ARE good ones). I've witnessed women taking the kids away, won't answer a phone call or text not even on holidays or bdays. then does nothing but bad-mouth him to the kids and brainwash them into believing that he just abandoned them and doesn't want anything to do with them. while the man is paying child support every week, month, year... and the can't afford to take her to court to at least be able to see them. These kids are really the ones suffering because of spiteful bitches and a system that's fucked, frankly... but the small majority of (GOOD) men, who by the grace of God, somehow get custody of their kids still get fucked by the system and still expected to work just as hard if not harder to provide without the praise they deserve and can go on with daily life and NOT bad-mouth the mothers. I've seen some women leave their kids for drugs, had prison time, or they simply couldn't handle it. (Again I knows everyone has different situations and I'm focusing on just a few) They come back 10-20years later like everything is cool.. and people don't harp on them like they would a man. especially when I've watched this man not say one bad thing about the woman for over 10 years and not once did she even call or pay 1 penny, and if she had called, the man would have been more then willing to let her talk to her kids. I know someone who takes care of 5 kids and 2 that's not biologically his, that one of his exes left with him a couple years ago when they were 2 and 5. they call him daddy and he's proud to be that for them. but how much child Support you think he gets and isn't complaining about it. (hint.. $0) she hasn't seen or talked to them in 3 years. and tell me how this next scenario is remotely "right" a man has to pay back Support on 3 kids because the state couldn't find her for 2 years. he pays over $500 a month and has no issues with this he believes they are his kids he SHOULD pay for them and if he could he would give them more personally. and the state takes his license because he owes back Support. and said if you can make a "good faith" payment of $1500 by the 30th we'll lift the suspension. oh by the way you will also have to pay a reinstatement fee and for a new id... and take time off work to go to the DMV. and don't forget you still don't get to see your kids or even know where they are... but if you want to take more time off work and pay for lawyers and court cost and still pay us.. you could probably see them when she gets subpoenaed to court next year.. maybe... meanwhile she doing and saying everything she can think of to turn the kids against the dad anyway so when he does finally see them, they hate him.. but she's not getting haggled as if she was a "deadbeat" parent. ?? WTF people!?! I do understand that everyone has a different situation,,, If we sit around and wait for the courts to right these wrongs we"ll be 4-5 generations on down the road. And who's paying for that emotiona
not all women deserve to be moms