She never paid for anything and dumped me for not having money?

I was with a girl for 2 years and she never once offered to pay for anything, never ever opened her purse.

I felt like I was being taken for a ride. We were deeply in love and I know she is my soul mate, I've never ever had a connection like I have had with her.

She didn't even pay rent... her mum helped with food always but my ex gf always said it is the man's job to pay. she dumped me over the phone for "not having enough money" and I was broken... it's been 3 years and I still think about her everyday.

I don't know how to get over her, I'm always looking at her Facebook page and I feel helpless. I sent her a message and Facebook and I never received a reply.

I took her and I on a 3 month holiday to south east Asia, and 80 percent of it was out of my pocket

We went on countless trips away for a week at a time for new years eves and other holidays and again I was always paying for EVERYTHING and my ex even had the nerve to ask why "we" had run out of money... I tried talking to her about it but it would always come back to her being old fashioned and she doesn't pay.

Another issue that we had is my ex never introduced me to her friends whom most are male friends. She would tell me it would cause problems for the relationship if I had met them. Towards the end of the relationship she was going to the movies with one of these friends and he was shouting her dinner and bought her flowers around to her house with expensive swarvoski jewelry. I was very hurt as she wanted to wear them and didn't see a problem with anything she was doing.

I love her and I never cared about money until she made it an issue by never offering to pay.

Why can't I get over her? I can't get with any girls as when I do she pops into my mind and I find myself trying to find a girl who compares to my ex's personality and looks.

Someone please help me, I'm lost and I know if I get back with her it will lead to me being unhappy again.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It sounds like she had a garbage personality- but you overlooked that because of how hot she is. For the most part, really hot people- especially girls- get all sorta of free things that normal people don't get. They're used to being treated better even if they don't necessarily deserve it. You continued to give give give and you're surprised why she wanted that pattern to continue? ... she's isn't an idiot. Perhaps next time, you can exercise better judgment in choosing a girl instead of going for the super hot girl who clearly has gold digger tendencies. It says a lot that it took you two years and getting dumped to figure out there's a problem. Sorry for ring harsh- but if you don't wake up, you will be taken for a ride again. By anyone- man or woman- smart enough to spot your naïveté and generosity.

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    • being* harsh
      Ducking autocorrect

    • Show All
    • LOL how adorable :p *yells some more* :D

    • I wasn't just with her for her looks. We could read each other, I could read her mind and she could read mine. From day 1 we had that ability and knew if something had happened to one another whilst being apart. It just sucks she had those gold digger tendencies and grew up in a posh area.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You have no self-esteem? You think this girl was the only girl in the world who would ever date you and so you put up with her shit?

    honestly, she's like a bad hooker. You're better off without her.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Stop it, now. She didn't have any particular reason to break up with you and so she made up one and that was you not having any money -_- seems she wanted to breakup with you but felt the need to try and find a valid reason as to why

    And even if to her you didn't have enough money and so she breaks up with you... why woukd you want someone like that anyways? I would NEVER break up with my bf just because he didn't have (enough) money why? Because I value you HIM not whats in his pockets! she's not worth it and never deserved a guy like you so dont try and play yourself once more byttrying to reconnect with her also the non response to your message on fb says it all she doesn't want anything with you you sound like a great guy go find someome worth your time

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    • You're right, she never let me meet her friends either so I think she was ashamed of me. I'm just focusing on myself now and when the right girl comes along I'll be ready :)

    • Exactly! TRUST ME she'll come :)

  • First of, you're not moving on because you're not ready to. You still believe she's still the one for you, and the fact is, you're actually missing a chance of meeting the one if you keep trying to contact her (nt moving on) I know its hard but just try going out with girls , be open to dating and meeting new people. Focus on WHAT YOU WANT, yourself, your needs. Experience things around you do activities that you love, you're interested in. When you're focused on yourself it gets easier. Love yourself remember that. Lastly, i can only give you advice, you're the one who has to make the changes. Good luck :)

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    • Yea I'm slowly realising I need to move on now and date other people :) I'm a bit shy in person so I find it hard to meet girls sometimes I just need a bit of a push in the right direction :)

      Thanks for your answer I like what you wrote :)

  • Don't even think about getting together with her again. She sounds like she has a rubbish personality and honestly she's in it for the money. Just end all communication, even delete her on Facebook her number etc.. Get yourself out there again and eventually some great girl will come alone. If it's really serious there are some disorders like Obsessive Love Disorder and what not that may explain your lingering feelings. Most of these types of cases are due to a low self-esteem. Try getting out there and meeting some other girls even if they aren't your type just get to know more people and see what happens.

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    • I've never heard of that disorder before but you could say I do have low self esteem sometimes. I'm getting out there and working on myself now a lot more than I used to :)

      Thank you for your advice

  • you are handsome and will do much better, trust me you deserve the absolute best

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  • dude she dumped you because she likes money... she no more wants to hear about you... she has already moved on and you... why can't you do the same and just move on?

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  • I think you could do better honestly a relationship is a two way street I pay sometimes you know. I would hate to be not contributing. I guess what I am trying to say is that I would want to be a queen alongside my king. And you are freaking attractive... I mean what the hell You need an upgrade. I am pretty sure with your looks and personality you should have gotten a lot of women in few secs right after you were single. geezzzz man don't think about this women again she was not worth it I met plenty of guys who had amazing chemistry with an I know your will meet someone better. I know I am late but I had to reply ^_^

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    • sorry for my horrible grammar typing to fast.

  • It's good you're not with her! You deserve better!

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  • That crazy in love feeling will wear off, it just takes time.

    Girl was a gold digging bitch. Sorry you got your heart broken. It happens to the best of us.

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    • Thank you :) I know it will take time.. everyday I am trying to focus on myself by working and going to the gym.

  • Leave her because she's a fucking gold-digger. She doesn't love you and she loves your money only. Sorry but it's frank. Open your eyes bro.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Ok, she wasn't your soul mate. If she was she wouldn't be complete douche bad about the money. She only cared about the money, not you. Right there should be enough for you to get over her. I think some people go through a phase after a break up of loneliness and fear of not finding someone else and so they latch on to their ex. Don't worry. Forget her, cheer up, buy yourself something nice, like a new suit/outfit and start looking for your true soul mate!

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  • first of all, you should be glad that you've gotten rid of her! how much more would she have taken out of your pockets? definitely sounds like a gold digger to me. she's more than likely just used you, believe it or not.
    and why can't you get over her? because you keep looking at her Facebook page. remove all contact from her. you need to start fresh.
    get a message from her? delete it on the spot. you shouldn't have anything that reminds you her, whatsoever

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  • What a waste she is - she loves your money, not you mate, that's the horrid truth.

    Block on Facebook, and get your life back on track.

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  • Man you're better of getting rid. Moving on will be hard I was in a similar situation, I was in love with a girl then I later realised I was just a good fuck to her... think you may have been under the same illusion. You fell in love with a gold digger now that may sound harsh but just my opinion man. Loves strange, but in all honesty I think you got out ar a good time say you had kids and got married then this happened? She doesn't sound like someone that deserves the amount of effort and all the good things you've got to give unfortunately she will be alone and get hurt the most in the long run. Hope you get over it soon

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  • #1: Love is based on emotions. Emotions are not rational. They don't make sense and change like the weather. Don't just base relationships on love.
    #2: There is no such thing as a "soul mate". WIth ~ 2.5 billion women on the planet, statistically, there are >1 that you will find attractive, who will also find you attractive, who will also be compatible with you.
    #3: She did take you for a ride. You were dating a level 5 user. With "gender equality", do not let any woman guilt trip you into paying for everything. I think it should be 50-50, but 60-40 is also acceptable. It's not the 1950s anymore. Women are earning more degrees than men, and their hypergamy is insane. It's time to reign it in.
    #4: Unfriend her on Facebook
    #5: Date other women. As the days go by, you will slowly think of her less and less.

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  • 😨😨

    Sorry to hear about that mate, but you should have dumped her ages ago it's probably best not to be involved in a relationship where the guy pays for everything that's bs in this and age. After knowing her for a little while and realising that she's not paying for anything should have been reason enough to dump her.

    You've just got to get over her it's been 3 years , you need to focus or something new. And stop looking at her Facebook that starts you thinking about her.

    And it's probably good for your bank account that you broke up 😨

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  • Sounds like you are better off without her.

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  • I know you feel horrible... Scientific explanation is that you were too nice to her.
    Also many white girls are gold diggers.

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