I've been with my boyfriend 3 years and engaged for 1. Generally he's a good guy and has never hurt or mmistreated treated me. We have the same morals and beliefs as well which has always been a plus. The thing is, he annoys the crap out of me! It's not that we spend to much time together either. We actually both live in Texas but 3 hours away so it's long distance. We see each other once or twice a month. What annoys me:
Simply the way he walks! It's in a way that looks feminine to me, The way he eats he gets really messy and kind of stares off & looks cross eyed, the way he holds his extremeties look feminine sometimes as well, he is very loud and doesn't care how he portrays himself in public, he's a real jokester and 80% of what he talks about links back to "something funny" instead of everyday convos and deep convos it's always about funny things he's saw or happened. when the phone rings and i see it's him i feel annoyed and i don't even know why! he makes jokes in serious convos and i have to remind him this is serious. most of the time he staggers with his words like it's not stuttering but it takes a couple seconds longer for him to say something compared to the average person and i get impatient sometimes. i feel terrible for all these things annoying me but i can't seem to make it go away! i haven't been feeling too much of a spark with him either. is it wrong to break up with a good person because they are annoying to you? There's a lot more of annoying things as well. Would it be right to marry someone who always irritates you. i don't want to be mean to him some day because he's annoying to me. I can't ask him to be less annoying either. If i ever ended things how do i tell someone that what makes them who they are, annoys me? Is this normal?
Most Helpful Guy
That's called a long-term relationship.
You're going to see some qualities over and over and over repeated in your partner, and some of them will annoy you, some of them you'll love, and some will be kind of lovingly annoying. You're also going to get to a point where you'll be able to predict exactly what your SO is going to do in a situation, and be right practically every time.
That said, I've been with my wife for about a decade (in the 8th year of marriage) and your list is way, way bigger than mine. It seems like you're kind of actively searching for things to get annoyed about at this point.
Anyway, it's unlikely to change. He's only going to become more and more predictable.
The way I look at it with my wife, there are more qualities I love about her than annoy me about her. And if she weren't with me, I would miss even her annoying qualities. That kind of sexual spark also doesn't last forever (I thought it would when I married her). You have to fall in love with the endearing qualities too, and unfortunately it seems a whole lot of them annoy you.1
Most Helpful Girl
That's not normal to feel annoyed by your partner 80% of the time, especially when it has to do with things that he can't necessarily change because it's part of who he is. I have to be honest, I don't think I can even count on one hand how many times my boyfriend has annoyed me. He just simply doesn't. Not to say he never has but I definitely have way more positive and happy feelings toward him then annoyed. id be concerned if I felt the way you are.1