- ... primary relationships [aren’t] helping young adults fulfill their needs...
- ... being under the influence of alcohol, the availability of another person to whom one is attracted, and the emotional vulnerability of feeling unhappy about oneself and/or about one’s relationship.
- ... infidelity is more layered than the narrative of “once a cheater, always a cheater.”
- Many hold the belief that infidelity is the result of immoral and over-sexed individuals wanting their cake and eating it too. But the reality is that infidelity is rarely just about sex.
- ... a partner may engage in an affair as an ill-equipped way of attempting to have their needs fulfilled... for intimacy, to feel valued, to experience more sex, and so on.
- Some [studies] find people who lack traits such as agreeableness and conscientiousness are more likely to be sexually promiscuous... as are those [with the traits of] narcissism, Machiavellianism, psychopathy]... Other studies find that infidelity is more likely to occur among people who hold less restrictive views about sex, such as that you don’t have to limit yourself to one sexual partner.
- ... people’s commitment to their partner and relationship satisfaction.
[UK survey findings—men’s reasons for infidelity]: 1. a lack of communication between partners 2. stress 3. sexual dysfunction with one’s current partner 4. lack of emotional intimacy 5. fatigue or being chronically tired
[UK survey findings—women’s reasons for infidelity]: 1. lack of emotional intimacy 2. lack of communication between partners 3. tiredness 4. a bad history with sex or abuse 5. a lack of interest in sex with the current partner
1. Individual reasons. [More likely to cheat: Gender—men because of testosterone; Personality—less conscientious and less agreeable people; Religiosity and Political Orientation—not religious & less conservative people.]
2. Relationship reasons. [partnership dissatisfaction, unfulfilling sex, and high conflict; and dissimilar personalities & education levels.]
3. Situational reasons. [Spending time with attractive people... work involving touching or discussions or where the sex ratio is imbalanced... or merely living in cities—which have more people, and more sexually liberal people.]
How does being tired make one more prone to cheat? I'm tired all the time but I'm not a cheater. 😂 I don't know that just stood out to me, all the other reasons that are listed make sense to me except that one. Or is it being tired/wore out of the relationship?
@420Rachel I don't know but I am guessing that tiredness puts one in a state where either your inhibitions (or energy to have inhibitions) are lowered, or that the anticipation of “off-limits” sex is pleasurable because of a dopamine/other hormone release) and takes a person (even if only temporarily) out of their “fatigued funk.”
Note: Wikipedia says this in its article about dopamine: “The brain includes several distinct dopamine pathways, one of which plays a major role in the motivational component of reward-motivated behavior. The anticipation of most types of rewards increases the level of dopamine in the brain.”
1.) He only wanted sex - This guy should have said, "I'm not interested in a relationship with you; I only want sex." from the very beginning, but either he didn't have the courage to say that or he overpromised and he now finds himself in a relationship he doesn't want.
2.) He's cheating for a reason - This guy wants the woman he's in a relationship with but she's not doing something (doesn't have to be sexual, believe it or not) that he wants.
It is possible she doesn't even know what it is because he never had that conversation, but don't rule out guys who do bring it up and she said no. Unbeknownst to the woman, her saying no doesn't end his craving of what he doesn't have. THIS guy cheats for a purpose and will find a woman who does what his girlfriend/wife ISN'T doing. If he had it at home, he really wouldn't cheat.
3.) He's greedy and it's for sport - He'll do it just for kicks and to see if he can pull it off. His girlfriend/woman never had a chance, there's NOTHING she can do to stop this guy.
I hope this helps, I wanted to give you some insight on this, good luck and be safe.
Not all men cheat. Something was either lacking in your relationship that made him prone to cheat or he's just an asshole that never cared for you in the first place. Well either way he's an asshole... If you're unhappy in a relationship and you even THINK about cheating, just break it off. If you want to sleep with other people when you're supposedly in a "committed" relationship, don't be in the relationship.
Your ex isn't all men. I'm very sorry that happened to you but it's not cool to make generalizations about an entire gender. Just because your ex was a terrible person doesn't mean other men will treat you that way. There are still plenty of good ones out there.
Of course, not all men cheat. And women cheat also. The important question for you is why did your ex cheat.
Did he cheat on one occasion or many times? More than one woman? Did you break up as soon as you learned about it or did you give him a chance to redeem himself? Did he ever give you an excuse for why he cheated?
I get you're pissed at your ex for cheating, but maybe choose your words better next time.
Two ex's cheated on me back in my 20s and yet, despite me having a number of opportunities, I've never cheated to this date.
So should I ask why girls always cheat?
Your following text is also not very clear. Your title asks why guys always cheat, then you say your ex was chatting it up with girls behind your back.
Last I checked, talking to other girls other than your girlfriend isn't cheating.
My ex's had actual sex with other guys behind my back and did more than just chat it up. That's cheating.
Perhaps stop for a moment and think about how to clarify your question so you're not generalising all of one gender based on your ex... And maybe provide something better as an example other than him talking to other girls, cuz that's not cheating.
Your man or your ex man cheated and chatted with other women behind your back. The guy you chose after finding him to your personal likings. No one else, no other man could be held accountable for the guy you chose to be your other half. No other man can answer for that particular guy that you know so well and we don’t. So does this mean you’re a cheater if other women cheat?
Think of how this must’ve sounded before typing it. Maybe you’re just writing from a place of pain but this isn’t justification to shade the title of men. Stop pursuing grown ass males and learn the true nature of a man as God intended.
Listen, not all men cheat, just like not all women cheat. Being social and speaking to women and having women as friends is not unheard of. Let's face it women flirt with men and men flirt with women. If it makes you uncomfortable that your man talks to women, let him know that it bothers you. That's the only way to solve the issue. One way or the other you won't have to deal with it, because if he continues you may end it.
If he happens to say "you know what babe I apologize and thank you for letting me know so I know. It won't happen again." Then all is well and you proceed happy land.
I don't believe all men cheat. You've just been unlucky to meet a guy who is weak. A guy who have no willpower and self-control over his emotions and desires. I don't believe ALL men are that weak. However, you don't know the true potential of a person until they're in a situation where they have an opportunity to cheat.
All men DON'T cheat. It sounds like you're choosing the wrong kind of guy. Believe it or not, there are sincere guys out there who are looking for a nice, sincere, faithful girl with whom they can fall in love, and to whom they can give their all. Maybe you need to move in different social circles.
We don't always cheat but if your relationship is loosing the excitement it once had or you expirence someone that lights a fire in you and your partner doesn't or refuse to explore newer things in the relationship we will do our explorations with someone else, love can come into play with this new person but love is rarely a factor for it; just curiousity the need to for exploration and a different perspective of a relationship outside your own.
I've never cheated and don't intend on ever doing so. I've been in two relationships, the first one I was engaged and out of nowhere she faked her death and I saw her 4 months later with an underage illegal immigrant as her boyfriend. Then I moved to my current relationship
Just because you got cheated on by your ex does not mean all guys are cheaters. I could say all women are cheaters because I was cheated on. I could say all women are psycho because an ex pulled a chef knife out on me. I would be wrong for thinking either of those things.
Because monogamy is impossible. That's just how we were made. We were put in this world to breed and reproduce and if it's with lots of people that leads to variations. And variations leads to evolution. Oh women cheat too
I said monogamy is impossible not that staying together for years is impossible. Many people still stay in relations even after one of them cheats yk. It could be that cheating isn't a deal breaker for them or that they're really forgiving. And when I say monogamy, i mean not doing any form of cheating whatsoever.
So you're saying that everyone who's ever been in a relationship ever has cheated? 🤣 Bruh. My own parents have been together for 30 years and I know for a fact neither one of them has cheated. I suppose you've cheated in relationships then because it wouldn't be fair to not include yourself in your generalization. 🙄
Maybe your definition of cheating only includes physical cheating. But when I say cheating I mean all forms of cheating be it fantasizing about someone else or flirting or asking someone else out. These are what my friends have experienced from their boyfriends and what I have seen being SINGLE all my life. Sure keep on making assumptions about me if it helps your case.
And there's a difference between finding someone other than your partner "attractive" and actually cheating. For example I think Chris Hemsworth is attractive but I wouldn't cheat on my boyfriend and sleep with him.
Well by your logic, if all human beings are cheaters, that it's simply impossible for us to be monogamous, that would mean you would as well, wouldn't it? 🤣
I really don't give a fuck if you find me a cheater or not or if you find me monogamous or not. And this is getting repetitive and boring. So I am no longer interested in continuing this conversation.
You haven't answered any of my questions. I'm not accusing you of being a cheater I'm just saying that, by your logic, everybody cheats, you're saying that you yourself are just as susceptible to temptation as the rest of us, am I wrong? Obviously it bothers you so answer my question, please.
For the same reason that "Women always cheat" Seriously if you want an answer to a question like that one need only look in the mirror.. Also its not a good idea to paint an entire gender badly when women are just as bad when it comes to infidelity.
Men are supposed to broadcast their seed whereas women are supposed to nurture a few select youngins so they need something close to monogamy men are constantly fighting the urge to bump the uglies of every fertile butt they run into.
Superb Opinion