Break Up & Divorce

Boyfriend broke up with me because he hurt me?

My boyfriend of almost 4 years broke up with me because he says that he has caused me so much pain and doesn’t want to continue causing me pain (emotional).

I tracked him because he continuously lied about his whereabouts (I caught him in the lie) and he got mad at me and refused to speak to me for a month. We got back together agreeing that we both need to change in order to make the relationship work. I told him I need more reassurance, meanwhile he told me that he can’t stand when I ask him where he is and who he’s with.

I explained why/how he has traumatized me in the past which has lead to me tracking him (I’ve asked do his location before and he refused to give it to me). I confirmed that after telling him all of these things that I did not fight with him and that I was telling him these things so he can understand how to do better for me in the relationship based on what I need now. He said yes we’re not fighting.

The next day, he decided to break up with me by saying “I ruined your life, I’ll never be good enough for you, I hurt everyone around me. I won’t talk to you anymore, I won’t bother you anymore. You just be happy. You will be okay without me. Im done causing you pain.”

I believe he is depressed and stressed for the past 2 years but refuses to seek help. I have tried to get him help.

I find this behaviour odd considering that 3 days ago, he was pouring his heart out to me explaining how good I am, how I good I deserve to be treated. That I’m the only one who understands him. That his life is better when I’m in it. He even encouraged me to talk about how I feel - which is what I did - and right after that he broke up with me.

I think he thinks that he’s doing this for me. This is not what I want and I told him repeatedly to not give up on us because I haven’t.

I don’t know what to think anymore. People tell me to give him space and he will come back eventually, but I don’t know about this time.

What are your thoughts on this?
Boyfriend broke up with me because he hurt me?
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