Break Up & Divorce

Is my ex trying to keep me there for when he wants me or is he being genuine when he says we could get back together in the future?

My ex boyfriend and I were together for 3 years, lived together with friends. We mutually broke up in March due to communication, mental health, and me moving 3.5 hours away, temporarily.

Not even 5 days after we were discussing getting back together as we didn’t end due to lack of love and didn’t consider ourselves single.

Mid June, we had an argument on the phone about communication and jealousy. We have never had trust issues before. We had space, he ended everything over a text, saying he needed to focus on his mental health, refused to talk.

I accept his decision, heartbroken, leave him alone. He tried contact me 3 weeks later begging to speak to me. I kept ignoring him. I called him a week later, he was cold and we argued a bit. We’ve spoken again and he drops hints about getting back together.

He gives mixed signals about future reconciliation. I ask him directly, do you want to be together again? He refuses to give me a clear answer. He doesn’t say yes, he knows it may give me false hope. He doesn’t say no, there’s a possibility he really does want to repair things when I’m back in the same city or in 3-6 months after both working on our mental health.

I asked him if he just wanted to sleep with others, it wasn’t that. He’d considered drinks with someone to fill the void but realised the thought of rebuilding a connection with someone else made him feel awful. But then says, if the opportunity presents itself, he may take it as a way to help move on.

He says he needs time alone. If we reconnect in the future, it is meant to be and would have to happen organically. He says things like “I know I shouldn’t say this, but I would love to try again in the future or say 6 months time.”

I’d said it would be a shame if we’d both had other sexual partners to then end up reconciling anyway. He said something like “If we try reconcile in 6 months time, we would’ve both had other sexual partners by then but would it matter if it were the rest of our lives together?”

Is my ex trying to keep me there for when he wants me or is he being genuine when he says we could get back together in the future?
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