I want to apologize to an ex, but is it bad to do so?

[Anonymous]

I have this heavy weight on my mind since 2020 and I have this urge to apologize to my ex boyfriend about my mistakes and wanting to come clean to him about something which is between me and him. (Its about me lying about my age and other stuff).

I was a minor and I shouldn't even be on Instagram during that age but I met him and I had a crush on him. He asked me out and we dated online. But that's not why I came here.

Is it the right choice to apologize to an ex after 4 years of an breakup? Is it manipulative in any way? I'm not really doing it with bad intent. I just feel guilty after growing up and wanting to learn from my mistakes and become a better person. I just don't want to come out of the blue and bring back memories to him. Should I just leave it alone? I don't know if he is still active on his Instagram account anyway, but if I just leave my apology, and sign out so I don't get attach again or anything.

Write your advice / opinion below. Thank you in advance! I need help from wise people.

[teamvic]

Does he KNOW you were a minor?

Or are you planning to say,"sorry, oh by the way I was underage" sorry for that

[Asker]

No, he didn't. I'm sure he was just two years older than me. I can't remember much about it. Yeah, I was planning on saying something similar but sincere and detailed

[teamvic]

Well since moving on is something you can't do

What's the root of you not being able to

Two years isn't toooo bad, but even then. If that were me. I wouldn't want to know at all. I get what you're saying and you feel guilty but if I found out I was dating a minor. Mmmmm I'd not only be mad I'd also feel disappointed and probably disgusted

What I'm trying to say is you telling him that would only really make him feel bad

And I get you want to feel not guilty anymore but I'm not too sure this is the way to do it

[slatyb]

No, it's over. Forget about it.

[hello4433]

Move on. It's been years

[Asker]

I don't know how to move on. The guilt and regret is stuck with me. I thought I got rid of it in 2022 but it seemed like it came back out of nowhere in late 2024

[hello4433]

You should move on cause he has moved on already

[In_Trance]

Don't bother