My ex boyfriend used me for sex. I'm heart broken.

So ,

I don't really have a question I'm just so devastated ..

My ex boyfriend broke up with me 2 months ago , about 5 days before my bday , saying he wasent sure about his feelings , we had been together 2 years, and I was crazy about him , I loved him with all my heart , so naturalluy when he said that I was devastated ...

from the day he broke up with me till about 2 weeks ago it was totally NC , then he texted me asking to meet ... I didn't give in at first the on Sunday he called me and we spoke we talked just like old times , and laughed ... I had missed him SO much...

So gave in and said he could come stay at my place , he brought us a take away and said he had missed me , and I wasn't that easy to forget .. I WAS so happy, too happy too see him again...

He stayed the night .. we had sex it was lovly we cuddled .. next day I went to uni and him back home ...

He just texted me to say " do you think we made a mistake ?" "I said I don't know , can we call and talk about it " he said no I'm busy tommorow .. He never called its been nearly a week ... I 'm just so heart broken ... How can someone I love so much just use me for sex .. How can anyone be so cruel .. How could I have been so stupid to invite him back in my life so quickly...

I just can't stop crying... I don't know if I'm going to get over it ...

I've never been this beart broken

Please I need I dk , advice? confort?


Most Helpful Girl

  • im sorry that happened to you; he obviously knew he was manipulating his way back in by telling you he misses you and how great you are that he was unable to forget you, cuddling and trying to get back into contact with you for like a week so to suddenly get cold feet and hint that it was a mistake is totally contradictory and a complete bs excuse, if he truly thought it was a mistake he wouldn't have tried to get back into contact so fast and push fast into emotional make ups and couple stuff - cuddling, movies, takeaway, sex. if he was unsure he'd have taken things a bit more slowly and talked first to be sure of his feelings, not have a one night stand, blow you off the next day then not contact again.

    i think you need to completely block him out of your life, delete and block from all social media, block his number in your phone (use an app no need to call your service provider), keep yourself very busy to keep your mind off him and tire yourself out so you'll sleep like a log and you'll forget him a lot faster

    you find someone 100% deserving of you one day, don't worry about the ones we have to go through to find mr right :) just think how miserable theyll be living their lives like that, theyll end up with a reputation and very lonely


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Nothing I can really say except you only really have yourself to blame for allowing him to trick you. Learn from this mistake and move on with your life.


What Girls Said 5

  • I am so sorry for your pain. It is hard to break up, but harder when you master it for two years and then slip up. Take a moment to breathe. Do you have a loving supportive friend or family member? (By supportive I mean NOT the person who listens for 3 seconds and then lectures you about why you went back with this LOSER when they told you not to to begin with) Build up your support system because your are going to need it. Know too that you are not alone in your pain. Others including me are suffering from heartbreak just like you. Some may say find things to distract yourself to avoid the pain, but for me that doesn't work. Distractions don't solve the root of the problem. The root of the problem is not your boyfriend. The problem lies within you. He may be a total jerk but you have to figure out what inside of you makes you want someone so much who doesn't want or love you? Do you love yourself? Do you think he is all you deserve? Is he familiar because he is like the men you grew up with?

    Try therapy. I think to many people are afraid to face themselves. Once you figure out you and heal will be able to move on. Also for me bible reading helps. Sometimes our support system can't be there because they are busy etc and that is usually when the pain is the deepest. When that happens I pull out my bible and do some bible reading and sincere praying.

    You have to focus on you now because you are never going to get a reasonable explanation from your ex because he is lame and doesn't care. He may even be a bit mental.

    You will be fine! Just breather. You are smart, beautiful and deserve someone who really loves you.

  • he didn't use you because you hopefully got something out of it too, he never promised you anything, you got together for old times sake and that Is all. Cheer up and the next time he comes around decide if you are happy with an emotionally unavailable guy in your life.

  • He didn't use you for sex.

    You didn't discuss what having sex would mean to both of you before actually doing so. You assumed one thing while he assumed another.

    Always discuss it first, especially with exes.

  • he preyed on your feelings and vulnerabilities. it's really douchey. you let him in but he definitely was a douche and you are justified for being upset. I guess it's a lesson to learn the hard way :/

  • this happens to so many girls.

    I remember the first guy I was with. He abused me physically and told me I was stupid fat and ugly. It destroyed me.

    But the best thing you can do is learn from it and move on. :) Itll be hard but it will make you a stronger person