My girlfriend doesn't post anything about me on Facebook

[Anonymous]

She listed me as her boyfriend for a while, but she then hid her relationship status. She takes pictures with me all the time, but almost never posts them. If she does, she won't even mention the fact that I'm her boyfriend. She did have a picture posted mentioning I was her boyfriend on instagram, but she deleted that after he ex started following her again, along with some other pictures I was in. She had one picture with me on Facebook, the same one that was on instagram that she deleted after her ex followed her, but then when he became friends with her on Facebook again, she deleted that as well. Then the other day, she posted a status saying how much she loved me and all that, but only made it viewable to specific friends, mainly my friends... when I confronted her about, she just went ahead and deleted it. When I'm with her, it's amazing. We love each a lot, she tells me she's never loved anyone as much as me. So what's the reason behind this behavior? I usually don't even care about this social media stuff, but the fact that she's trying to hide things, just worries me.

[jam66]

This happened with my ex. He had loads of pics with his exes on Facebook and loads of statuses acknowledging they were his girlfriend at the time, but with me he was happy to put we were in a relationship but that was it. In our whole relationship of a year there was one picture of us on Facebook that was put up by someone else. He refused to have photos with me and when I questioned him on it he said he hated the way he looked. He too like your girlfriend seemed to be hiding me from his exes. I dumped him because I didn't see why I deserved to be treated differently to his other girlfriends. And guess what...4 weeks later he got a new girlfriend and there were pics of them all over Facebook and statuses about how much he loved her.

Guess what I'm trying to say is...if anyone has to hide the fact they are with you, they are not worthy of you and it is time to move on. Before they hurt you more.

[acka72]

best answer

[whatyousaid]

I don't necessarily think that Facebook is the be and end all of life. If they are starting to act strange around you in person then that is when the alarm bells should be ringing. I think we put too much emphasis on Facebook and that it means everything to our lives. that's bullsh!t. If you are constantly posting on Facebook how much you love each other through status's or on each others wall, to me is a bit odd. I ask the question when I see that, what are they trying to prove to each other?

[BrunetteNYC]

Well exactly! I had one guy LD all over me and then I just LIKED one of his status updates and some other women he was dating over there in his country the next day posts a picture of them for the holiday. Hello what a lie! If you were really the ''happy couple'' she would not have had to out herself that she existed on FB meanwhile he NEVER told me a thing about her. It's like pretending to be something they aren't.

[jam66]

No I agree with the second comment, and trust me I'm not so shallow I would base an entire relationship on my partner's behaviour Facebook. I broke up with him for many other reasons, however the Facebook thing was a contributory factor. He was someone that spent a lot of time on social media sites + was the one in the beginning that forced me to change our relationship status on fbook in the 1st place. No its stupid, but that is the world we live in today. You have to go by your own situation.

[whatyousaid]

Lol I'm not saying you are. My comment was definitely a generalisation. I still stand by what I said though. Facebook is bad news for relationships sometimes cause it creates insecurity in people which then leads to problems when you're with each other. My personal opinion is if you want a good relationship, keep it off Facebook if you know it will create insecurity. From what I've read and seen Facebook in general can be bad news for relationships.

[whatyousaid]

Sorry I think its ridiculous that people think you have to change your relationship status on fbook to make it official. That's BS. Plus I had a conversation with my ex girlfriend about this and I said I would change my relationship status even if we got married. I still stand by that today that when I meet my next girlfriend, if there is one out there, that I won't be changing anything.

[jam66]

Yes absolutely I agree with you :). I personally wish the stupid thing had never been invented. It caused more trouble than was worth. I just didn't want you to think that I dumped him just for the Facebook thing lol. I actually made the decision to leave Facebook around 6 months ago as its not just relationships it can ruin. Feel much better for it :)

[whatyousaid]

I knew that wasn't the only reason so don't worry. But I also think you hurt him more than he lead on. Why else would he be posting pictures of him and his new girlfriend 4 weeks after you split up? He's trying to hurt you I think.

[dreamergirl94]

Maybe she doesn't want her ex to feel bad? Maybe she actually considers his feelings and that it might hurt him to see her with you? Some girls actually have a heart after a break up, believe it or not. This all depends on how bad the break up really was and if it ended on a terrible note or not.

I do the same thing. I don't post pictures of my boyfriend and I ANYWHERE. I have a couple of times and then I went and deleted them, mostly because I know my ex is following me on social media sites and I think about how I would feel to see a picture of him and a new girl.. it would hurt deeply. So that's why I don't do it anymore. Not because of any feelings or cheating or crap like that, but because I simply care about his feelings and I put myself in his shoes.

Don't go suspecting without considering these things first. That's why you must ask her.

[whatyousaid]

A lot of people are very cynical cause of a bad experience but I don't actually think people should always jump to conclusions. I'm surprised this has been down voted cause I think there is a lot of truth in what you're saying. Social media does destroy relationships because everyone gets involved cause everything is so public. I think all that matters is how two people feel about each other, and how they show each other when they are together in person.

[dreamergirl94]

@whatyousaid , couldn't have said it better myself!

[lumos]

Normally I'd say "the best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook", but because she posts and deletes stuff when her ex just "happens" to follow her, and hides her relationship status etc, I do have to say it sounds a little weird. Maybe she's ashamed of the relationship, or maybe she doesn't want her ex to know that she's off the market. Ask her, but don't go straight to cheating. Just ask what she's doing and why she's doing it, and be calm about it. If she doesn't answer calmly, you'll know you hit a nerve and that something is up.

[whatyousaid]

Great answer.

[Matt-A]

I've only hidden my relationship status from other people on FB once, and it was because I was getting ready to be out of it. Why else would someone do it?

If she was happy and excited to be in a relationship with you, she'd be showing it to everyone else. Tell her that you've noticed what she's doing and put the ball in her court. If you posted here it means you're afraid to though, so all I can say is grow a pair and do it.

Think more highly of yourself than to let your girl to leave you behind in your relationship in any regard, whether that be in person or online. Women like confidence and direction from a man.

[Chris011]

Hey man, I think that she is doing something behind your back that you don't know about. I think this because this girl did the same exact thing to me and I found out she was cheating on me with another guy! Be cautious man.. I say go and talk with her about it. Fyi, she could be really manipulative and lie to you as well.. just do what your gut feeling is telling you. Don't let your "emotions" get the best of you! If you suspect that something is wrong, chances are it is.. good luck man, I wish you the best on this. Feel free to message me or comment if you would like to know more.

[acka72]

Do the same to her and then see how she reacts. She can be doing two things: 1. She is manipulating you so that you are more into her. Which means she keeps her distance on purpose to make you chase her and want her more which clearly is working. 2. She is still hung up on her ex and she's not happy being with you but is one of those idiotic chicks whose sole existence depends on having a boyfriend.

1. you can solve by giving back the shit she's giving you, earn her respect and forge a relationship. For number 2. Please dump her sorry ass before she clips off your balls and dumps you.

[chrisbigman]

What if he doesn't have an ex?

[Anonymous]

Yeah this seems a bit shady to me. She's going through way to much work if she's not trying to hide something. She really wouldn't be deleting pictures period if she was open about your relationship.

Some people like to keep their love life private and I get that. So not posting things about your relationship, and hiding your relationship I think is acceptable to a degree, but constantly deleting photos is kind of weird and doesn't really have a good and reasonable explanation in my opinion.

My guess is this girl is just really manipulative and is playing the game to keep you and her ex around and be available to both. She telling you she loves you and acting like things are great, but at the same time is being selective about what other people see so that she doesn't kill her chances with her ex. I dealt with a very similar girl and situation once and it ended up having a negative outcome.

Tread carefully, if what you say is true, this definitely smells fishy.

[BrunetteNYC]

I would like to add that over this Christmas holiday, I myself along with numerous other friends, Facebook was the reason for break-ups and tears. It is becoming such a relationship KILLER! May I now suggest you both stay off the damn thing and there will be no more of this drama, LOL.

[Anonymous]

I would definitely ask her about it, but in a casual way.don't accuse her of anything, just ask calmly about it. It sounds fishy from my perspective, but I would just sit down and discuss it with an open mind, careful heart and use your best judgement.

[Anonymous]

UHG. I had a girl that did this too. She was still seeing her ex behind my back. I guess that guy liked his girlfriend slutting around with new dudes or something. I didnt, she's gone.

[TheOneTurv]

the heck? From my POV this looks like trouble. You gotta talk to her. But try not to act like you stalk her (we all do anyway haha). But yeah just ask her dude.

Good luck! :D

[sociopath]

Sorry you all responded to this how hilarious he's 51 has an add on craigslist stating "I'm a single 51 yr old male" which he is...and he emailed me snips of this...I thought wtf? 18-24? His story is SO madeup...I don't even have instagram "dude" you all got punked!

[6Paul11]

This could get messy. Maybe you should try posting pics of the two of you on your Facebook and make it clear you are together. See what happens.

[chrisbigman]

You have a right to be worried. She's being an immature brat. She apparently still has feelings for her ex. You might need to consider breaking it off, because she's either a liar or hypocrite. She hasn't appeared to have grown up yet - if at all.

[BrunetteNYC]

Wow I think her actions speak louder than words... why is she hiding the relationship from certain people? Weird. I say you DO THE SAME to her.

[neoagent1]

I'd say post a bunch of things including her on your Facebook, make sure she's tagged in it so her friends can see it. See if she says anything. Either that or confront her, either way get some real communication going.

[EdibleCaramel]

she could just be avoiding that future breakup and having to see your pics every where especially starting anew relationship. So she's just preventing future pain or awkwardness by not having you all on her face book... maybe...

[SandraSlip]

Who cares what she posts and FB and hwat not, as long as your relationship is going well?

[xsticksAndstonesx]

I would say she either is cheating, is for some reason ashamed of the relationship, or just likes privacy in a relationship. You should ask her and find out for sure.

[Anonymous]

If things are good between you and her then don't read to much in to it

[cristiina]

Do the same thing to her.

[chrisbigman]

What if a guy doesn't have an ex?

[cristiina]

he doesn't have to have an ex, he just has to stop posting things about her girlfriend and ignore their relationship on Facebook

[LoganK]

Bro, she's cheating on you

[Anonymous]

some people are more private

[Woman2005]

SUSPECT

[indian_empress_91]

ASK HER! :)

[Anonymous]

She's a hoe

[neoagent1]

she's a garden tool?

[Anonymous]

More Facebook drama.

[Anonymous]

Tell her about it