I'm twenty years old, and have been dating the same guy since I was thirteen years old. It's been a difficult road, there's been joy and there's been pain, there's been amendments and there's been disputes. Above all there's been love. And through it all, he's been my one and only, and I'm proud of that fact. A first love is a once in a life time chance, and it creates a bond that no other could recreate, and at this point im reveling in it. Very few are gifted this. Many must date around. That being said...
Many girls/guys I've known, with perfectly happy, healthy relationships, have given up those very same relationships because they're afraid of "The One". The one who:
1. The one who you're drawn to no matter the circumstances.
2. The one who can lift you up the highest and drag you down the lowest.
3. The one who you make allowances for like no other simply because they are who they are.
4. The one whose every word and gesture you hang on to, your admiration is so great.
5. The one who knows you best and could break you, but you entrust your heart with anyway.
Because of "The One", or the anticipation of "The One", they value life lessons, above stable relationships. Its either too much, or not enough instantaneously. Overall, they feel that if it's meant to be it's meant to be, and, if not, they should cut their losses and hunt elsewhere. But that's not so. Every successful relationship has three key ingredients:
1. Falling in love over and over again with the same person.
2. The willingness to communicate.
3. The patience to surrender to one another for the sake of the relationship.
THIS is the relationship stage-dating around is completely different! The relationship stage is when some foundation of companionship has been settled, when some form of commitment to each other has been agreed upon.
The relationship stage, though comfortable, is an ever changing environment and needs regular maintenance. Because of this, do not think of "The One" in artificial terms. "The One" is the one who cares for you, respects you, and thrives along side you. As such, your focus should be on raising that relationship to fruition.
Unfortunately, many are instead stuck on "The One" on a much less realistic level. This is the true problem with young dating today. "A One" will grab their attention at this stage, make them wonder about what their life would be like outside of the relationship. And many will take the bait just to feel the excitement of a new conquest that'll quickly falter and fizzle out.
Don't take the bait? Don't worry. You're "The One" can, and will, provide. You're missing nothing. This is because of the three key ingredients listed above:
1. Falling in love over and over means constant courtship, keeping the relationship alive and going through silly stages of crushing, dating, and seriousness all the time. It never gets old. It's amazing!
2. Communicating means being on the same page. Spreading happiness,sharing pain, etc. With communication, there is never any room for doubt. Loves an open door, always being aired out.
3. Surrendering yourself to your partner means you'll always know you're needed and wanted by the one person you need and want most. This is THE goal of any relationship.
Don't be afraid of "The One". Less is more. "A One" doesn't compare!
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