Internet Dating Vs. Real Dating

[pavlove]

This is a question that has been bothering me a bit because I don't feel like internet dating is taken seriously enough to be actually compared (by internet dating I include webcaming someone from a different country in order to date to exchanging messages and meeting people in real life together) vs real dating which is meeting them and interacting with them with no virtual technology prior to meeting them. I don't claim to even have a clue on the "right" answer, but here are my thoughts...

FOR MEN:

- You will think it's a lot more work

When you first start swiping right you will find you have six or seven girls in a matter of minutes that think you're cute and message you back pretty quickly. That euphoria will transfer to some good confidence that might get you some decent early success. After a few days though you'll start to have your messages not returned by the one girl you were really into and would actually show around to your friends. You'll start to have to work at it and sometimes go a week without even one decent thing going with a girl despite swiping everyday. You'll compare results with friends with all of you slightly exaggerating your success. You'll constantly ask yourself why you put in this much work for this little result.

- You will stay because it is far less terrifying

What becomes a good side source for meeting girls becomes the main source because you don't have to risk awkwardness. Furthermore, you don't have to be in a good mood. You can do it when you're tired, when you're just bored, etc. You don't have to make it a special event and you don't have to be in a bright and sunny mood to get results. Even though you'll hate it, you'll swipe right at least every so often.

"Yeah...right. It's a little too early in the morning to lie to yourself that this is ever a real scenario."

- You will come to think it is far more difficult to get taken seriously

You'll know your game was tight and you were hot enough for this girl and yet you wonder why it is that it just doesn't feel the same as meeting girls the normal way. You'll meet a girl in person and you'll be amazed at how easy it is to get a response even though she's more attractive than most of the girls who make you wait forever on Tindr. You'll conclude that you're not being taken that seriously.

- You won't take the girls as seriously either unless they're gorgeous

Most guys aren't trying to find love on things like Tindr. If they are, there still is a bit of...well I could do better this is an online girl after all even if you do end up dating her. If she's gorgeous (it does actually happen it's just extremely rare like finding a Ditto in Cerulean City pokemon blue reference whatup) then you'll brag that you got this girl off of Tindr because somehow the fact that you plucked her out of obscurity is a source of pride for you. Otherwise, you'll just kind of have a toolish attitude about the girls you meet up with.

- You will always be suspicious

What the hell is wrong with these girls? Ironically if you get what you want, you will sabotogue yourself with the belief that what you want and constantly swipe right for doesn't actually exist.

- You will never take it seriously

Again, on this point. It's just not real dating.

- It will take a lot to get you to stop

Again, on this point, it's so damn easy and consequence free.

FOR WOMEN:

- You will think it's a lot less work

Literally just pick from guy after guy while you watch netflix on your 13 inch monitor who all want you. Some are funny, some are actually hot, none require anything from you but a few pushes of your thumbs.

- You won't stay because it's boring

You get oversaturated. It's too much and it loses value. You don't want a 100 guys, you want just one good one. now the task of finding which one that is has become damn near impossible.

That guy who looks a little like a Brunette Ryan Gosling just asked you if you ever had a threesome with a guy and his sister...too soon?

- You will believe the guys to be a lot more thirsty (maybe even more than they are)

When a guy knows he is competing and has no way of gauging your response, he works extra hard to get your attention. You get so many messages that are too sweet, or trying to hard to be funny, or trying too hard to be mean that you conclude that no guy is normal and if you were to go out with a guy who tries this hard you too much be a loser.

- You will always keep a little bit of shame about how you had to meet them

It will be funny to you and your friends in the beginning. You may even take turns messaging from the same profile. You'll send bizarre messages you get sent for laughs. Eventually you'll meet a guy you like, but the laughing won't stop.

- There will always be a bit of humor attached to it.

More on the previous point, a bit of you will always think apps like tindr are funny. this won't go away just because you meet a cool guy.

- It will be really easy for you to stop

You're just looking for an excuse. You don't need it to be a boyfriend. It could literally be anything. Maybe you found a new candy crush clone!

WINNER: WOMEN

WHO PLAYS MORE: MEN

[Bards]

I met two decent friends on there. plenty of dudes just wanted sex or were strippers advertising and the rest swiped right and didn't answer a message.

One time I said to a guy (his bio said something about "professional head turner mind you) "oh wow you're gorgerous! Do you swipe right on everyone?"

And he says "pretty much"

Then I say "oh lucky me!"

And that was that.

But usually the guys will come across like decent people, might ask you why you are there and then soon enough ask for sex or nudes even if thats not why you are there.

No one should use tinder and expect much unless they want sex. It doesn't matter how you look, they are game. If you want a date or potential boyfriend, etc you'll be gravely disappointed.


Tinder has plenty of great looking people who are actually garbage.

And sites like okcupid have mostly average, decent people.

Thats what I've seen in my area only though.
Its interesting to see who flocks to what.

It really is better to go outside and meet people.

[pavlove]

i agree with everything. that's interesting that good looking guys use the app since the stereotype is that good looking guys wouldn't have any need for an app.

[Bards]

Lol yeah because you can just ask for sex easier. Good looking guys/models can't just walk up to a girl on the street and be like lets have sex. They have to go somewhere like a club and talk and put in some work. But online you hide behind a screen and can just pick and choose and text message and get lucky.

[pavlove]

oh yeah, you're right. and since tinder is so superficial it benefits good looking guys a lot more than a site where your bio/description counts for a lot.

I guess tinder is really for ugly girls who want to hook up with good looking guys and vice versa.

[Bards]

Its for anyone but good looking people win at it more if they just want sex quickly or friends with benefits or a date too.

[pavlove]

Talking from personal experience, eh @Bards?

[Bards]

Thats what I've been doing from the start

[tyrantfuryre]

Internet dating is some bull.

[ccp16]

Really nice take man! I have only used tinder, which is online dating in my books and I thought a lot of this as well.

I will say, I think guys have to work much harder, put more time into it etc. but I also think the guys that actually find a girl via online, actually make it work.

Girls who do way less effort and get way more attention have the problem of finding more dates, but the quality is way less than for the guys.

And I agree, girls get bored with it easily as guys throw themselves at women on there way too much.

Met my current girlfriend on tinder though, going on 8 months, very solid I must say.

[pavlove]

wow, I've heard of this happening, but I can't imagine. It doesn't bother you that she was on Tindr? Is she really high quality not just looks but also everything else?

[ccp16]

I think it is extremely rare on tinder, but ya the whole package. I never really date girls witch super high good looks... But I think she is really pretty and turns me on very easily.

I actually know lots of good girls on there, but they get flooded with really good looking guys and basically anything they swipe to is a match, so they give up and don't put much effort in. But they are very datable, the majority of guys on there are just pricks.

[red324]

The problem is girls are very dishonest about themselves on these sites. They post pics that make them look beautiful or old pics and then you see them in person and realize they're 100 pounds over weight. Honestly I don't mind if a girl is a little overweight it's fine, I don't expect her to be a super model and honestly don't want that anyays. It's not even the looks they lie about, they lie about their personality too and things they're interested in. I've had girls says they are a bit on the wild side only to have her show up and not hardly say a word.

[LuneClaire]

The problem with online dating is that it becomes a shopping experience par excellence: with too many women, men can just scroll down a long list or reject a lot of women- thinking there is something 'greener' on the other side. This applies to women too.

[Anonymous]

ONLINE DATING = GIRLS LOOKING for Boosting their EGO. Never boost girls ego!!!

[EvilPimp]

MHO for sure!

[pavlove]

lol seems fairly one sided...

[Jgirl20]

I've never used tinder but I have used soul singles and me and my boyfriend for 6months now

[pavlove]

wow never heard of that one. how long were you going on it before you met him?

[Jgirl20]

Maybe a month I was on it.

[bloodmountain1990]

Tinder is interesting. Definitely more geared for hookups as opposed to other sites but something can come from meeting someone off there.

[neofuture]

Online dating = No chance of relationship for either, problem solved

[Anno_Domini]

Not true at all. I met my fiancee online.

[Anno_Domini]

Not on Tinder, though.

[neofuture]

Tinder relationships "Netflix and chill" goes fucks and vanishes never to see eacother agian, that not a relationship that's a booty call

[Anno_Domini]

I met my fiancee on a paid Catholic dating website. It works when both people are looking for something serious.

[Anno_Domini]

What's all this "swiping right" stuff, anyway? If you're talking about Tinder, then there's your problem.

[Anonymous]

i bet the girl in the second pic is a freak in bed.