If Dating Was a Game of Poker

ChromAzonyx108

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Poker and dating have their similarities. I've taken some poker terminology and given a definition of what it means when it comes to dating. Here's the format I'm using:

Term

Definition in Poker:

Definition in Dating:


Bad Beat

Poker: A good hand that is “cracked” or beaten by a better hand that usually was way behind but hit a lucky draw.

Dating: When things are working out but you’re cock-blocked by someone who has something better to offer.

Bleed

Poker: To consistently lose chips through bad play, possibly resulting from tilting.

Dating: When you’re heart breaks from having been rejected so much, then you're bleeding out.

Blinds

Poker: The mandatory bets made by the first two players to the left of the dealer button.

Dating: The person who pays for the date…usually guys :P

Bluff

Poker: Making a bet without the best hand in the hope that your opponent(s) will fold and you will win the pot.

Dating: When someone lies about any aspect of themselves so that they can compete with others and get what they want.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Calling Station

Poker: A player who calls too often is a calling station.

Dating: A clingy person who won’t leave you alone OR when a guy will hit on any girl that passes by no matter how many times they get rejected.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Chasing the Flush / Flush Draw

Poker: When a player has four cards in his hand of the same suit and is hoping to draw a fifth to make a flush.

Dating: When you’re a 5/10 chasing a 9/10 and you’re chances of succeeding are low but can be very rewarding if it pans out.

Check Raise

Poker: To check when it is your turn to bet and then, after someone else bets, to raise that player’s bet.

Dating: When you know you have something good to offer but play it cool so that you can raise the stakes and get more from the opposite sex.

Continuation Bet

Poker: A bet from a player on the flop who raised pre-flop is known as a continuation bet or simply a c-bet.

Dating: When you’re not sure if a relationship is going to work out but you continue to play along - this will either pay off nicely or completely backfire.

Donkey

Poker: An opponent who plays poorly and seems to be throwing his money away.

Dating: A guy who sucks at picking up girls OR someone a girl takes advantage of for a free meal.

High Card

Poker: A hand that is judged on the value of the highest ranked card among the five.

Dating: Someone who is single and stoned.

Loose

Poker: Loose poker players will often play a wide variety of hands.

Dating: Someone who is desperate enough to go out with just about anyone.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Poker Face

Poker: A blank expression that does not reveal anything about the cards being held.

Dating: When someone is hiding their emotions or intentions.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Probe Bet

Poker: A bet made primarily to gain information by gauging opponents' reactions, especially a small bet made in pot-limit or no-limit games.

Dating: A weak attempt at attracting or picking someone up, done in order to gage their interest in you.

Railbird

Poker: Someone who hangs around a poker room who watches the games and/or is looking to get into action.

Dating: Almost the same – a guy who hangs around a bar who watches the girls and/or is looking to get into action.

Raise

Poker: To increase the previous bet.

Dating: An erection. ex: she gave him a raise

Represent

Poker: To represent a hand is to play as if it were held (whether it is or not).

Dating: Pretending to be something you’re not; putting on airs.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Re-raise

Poker: To raise a raise.

Dating: When the girl also gets aroused.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Rainbow

Poker: Three or four board cards of different suits. If a flop contains three different suits it is said to be rainbow. If the turn is a card of the fourth suit, a flush will not be possible.

Dating: When you’re not sure what a person’s sexuality is and things could go either way.

Rock/Nit

Poker: A tight-passive player.

Dating: Someone who has extremely high standards and unrealistic expectations and, as such, isn’t likely to ‘win’ at the dating game.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

...but to be fair:

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

If Dating Was a Game of Poker

Seating List

Poker: A waiting list. A player would put his or her name on this list if there were no seats at the table at which they wish to play.

Dating: When someone has you put on back-up if things don’t work out with the person they’re pursuing; a 'little black book'.

Shills

Poker: Shills are paid props who help start and maintain poker games.

Dating: Wing-men or wing-women.

Tight

Poker: Tight poker players usually play a small number of only the best hands.

Dating: Someone who is picky about who they will date and has high standards. This is different from a rock/nit as the standards can be reasonable.

Tilt

Poker: A player who has lost his discipline and is playing too loosely and very aggressively in a desperate attempt to win a pot is said to be on tilt. This is normally caused by a series of bad beats that has frustrated the victim.

Dating: Almost the same - a guy who has lost his discipline and is playing too loosely and very aggressively in a desperate attempt to win a girl is said to be on tilt. This is normally caused by a series of cock blocks that has frustrated the victim.

Two Pair

Poker: Two cards of matching rank, with another two cards of another rank

Dating: A double date, two girls and two guys.

Walking Sticks

Poker: A pair of sevens.

Dating: High-heels.


Wow, that was 25 terms - I didn't think I had so many. Sorry if this myTake was a bit long. There are many other poker terms though so I challenge you to come up with an analogy that isn't on my list.

If Dating Was a Game of Poker
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Most Helpful Guy

  • the_rake
    Haha awesome, I love this way of thinking. I would identify most with tight (aggression), check raise (playing it cool), continuation bet (knowing when to commit to something). Some things to try but be wary of : bluffing/misrepresentation (spicing up the truth), probe bet (when you don't want to take a massive risk but willing to chip in a little), chasing the flush (when you feel maybe its safe to punch a bit out of your league) and railbird (if you want an outside perspective but without coming over as a creep).
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • apple24
    I know nothing about poker! haha! Um But I read everything under dating!
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

06
  • SebastianAllDay
    I like this, poker is fun and can be difficult. Same with dating! I reckon I'll stick to blackjack though with better odds and hope that works in the dating scene too!!
  • GypsyBlood
    Life is harsh, it isn't that cut or dry, good analyzation though.
  • DarkHumorRUs
    I don't know how to do either of those things.
  • Anonymous
    If dating were like poker. Woman would have a large sum of chips while most men will start out with like 1-3 chips. When we look at it form 20's perspective. By 30's men have more chips than woman having amassed it over the years in the game. By 35+, women are now in the position of men while men are in position of woman when it comes to dating.
  • Anonymous
    I didn't read all of that but I'd say if it was like poker then I would have folded every single hand...
  • Anonymous
    As opposed to what it actually is; a game of poke-her.
    • I wish I thought of that one, that's pretty good. It also has sexual connotations.

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