Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You


This article is purely based on my personal experience/opinion and those of close female friends of mine. It is not intended to offend anyone.

You Won't Pay For The Girl On The First Date!

If you can't invest on the first date, then don't bother investing in the relationship. The first meeting sets the tone, and unless the girl insists on splitting the tab... you should insist on paying.

Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You

You Call Me "Baby, Honey, Sweetie" & You Don't Even Know My Last Name!

If I just met you, and within the first few days, you're calling me pet names, I am going to assume you're a player. Can't remember my name? You're right "sweetie" suits me just fine... NOT.

Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You

You Take Forever to Respond to Calls/ Messages or Respond With 1 Word Answers!

I understand everyone gets busy, but if you message me back with 1 word, I am going to assume you're not interested and just move on. If you don't call me back for a week, don't bother calling.

Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You

You Are Too Pushy For Sex!

We just met, and you're inviting me over for "Netflix and Chill", or maybe you just really wanna show me those new sheets you got for your bed?

Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You

You Are Too Clingy/Not Clingy Enough!

We just had a first date and you've messaged me 16 times, called me 22 times, and planned the next 504 dates, and it's not even the next morning... AWW... or you just disappeared into think air. POOF.

Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You
Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You
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58Girl Opinion
169Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Girl

  • Reallio
    1. HAHAHAHAH No. Go dutch, or hell, you pay the damn bill. Why don't YOU invest in the relationship? Self entitled ass...

    2. True but did you ever take the time to tell him? If so do YOU even know HIS name? Plus people forget names all the time. I'll have someone tell me their name 2 times in one sitting then completely forget the next day. Sad I know but that shouldn't come off as rude, especially if you have a generic ass name (like Amy, Ebony, Emma or Jasmine). Plus you're probably not even interesting enough to remember, swerve bitch xD (I'm just pulling your chain)

    3. Yeah, maybe they are busy and don't have enough time to type a full sentence. Sorry their 1 worded response wasn't what you wanted princess, but when you're just dating, they don't revolve around you yet. People have lives outside of relationships. (Not the case for me though xD hahaha I'm a loser.)

    4. Nowadays I see more and more promiscuous women who're pushy. People like sex. And sometimes when people are single, all they require at that moment is sex. Don't complain about it. Take it as a compliment and move on.

    5. Nice overgeneralization, have enough standards? Others are eager for relationships, therefore clinginess happens (God knows I'm clingy to my guy xD) And then others aren't as eager/ready for a relationship so they take it slower than normal, it's to be expected. Especially now since people are getting screwed over romantically left and right.

    You need to chill xD
    Is this still revelant?
    • Pedro_N

      A well deserved bowing for this lady.

    • Reallio

      @Pedro_N Many thanks ^_^

    • Pedro_N

      And it applies for both sides...

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Most Helpful Guy

  • BubbleBoy69

    And the reason no man should take women out on dates unless she is your girlfriend is because somehow women see nothing wrong with sleeping with other guys and/or flaking on you while you date them. I mean come on guys you drop 150 on a girl for the first date and then once she gets her fill she goes no contact on you.

    I'm going to give you a good reason how you guys could get cucked so easily.

    This woman from Toronto used men for free meals. She exclaimed she already new within 5 minutes whether she was going to sleep with them or not and strung many guys along to carry her to fancy restaurants so she could eat food that she otherwise couldn't afford because she was a broke actress.

    For that same girl your wining and dining and dinning there was another guy she gave it up to night one who just had to talk to her a few words because she felt really "comfortable" with him.
    Is this still revelant?
    • *Also that same girl your wining and dining there was another guy she gave it up to night one who just had to talk to her a few words because she felt really "comfortable" with him.

    • 10dsw

      Well said... I really wish more guys understood the realities of the dating world in 2016.

      Most guys are still living in the "I am going to pay for the date because I am a gentleman" while their dates are already arranging hook up plans with other guys =P

    • Typical white woman.

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • aeblalock
    You know, I hate to sound argumentative but these reasons are simply not enough for a woman to have any sort of resentment toward a man. Men are not women. They behave differently.

    Just to address your points:
    -Paying on the first date: How would you feel if you were obligated to pay for a man indefinitely (thinking that it is an expectation)? Would you resent that person or would you gladly pay the bill? What if you were in debt and really couldn't afford to pay for two people every time you go on a date with this person?
    -Pet names: so he doesn't know your last name; but he still likes you so he wants to call you baby, honey, etc.
    -Texting: Men are known for being less communicative over text messaging. It's been said time and time again that women put way too much thought into a mans texting habits.
    -Pushy with sex: Men are biologically wired to spread their seed. Good, bad, or whatever, it's just how they are. If a man is in a committed relationship with a woman, he will want to have sex with her! Even if he's just on a first date, if he's attracted to his date,, sex will run through his mind at some point.
    -Not clingy/too clingy: This has nothing to do with a man's behavior but a woman's expectation of his behavior.

    So, while I like your post and thank you for prompting such thought, I have to give my opinion - the way women resent men is one of my soapboxes and I feel like the expectations women have of men are destroying the very fabric of the modern relationship.
  • AleDeEurope
    I agree with all, it makes sense.
    What bothers me is the not paying for the first date. So I show that I'm interested/invested in you, by paying... but what do girls do to show that? This is what pisses me off about dating, that girls don't do anything to show what they demand from us :/
    • JCT666

      Bitches be money cravin'... -_-

    • @JCT666 Yeah, it sucks that you will treat them perfectly, kindly, giving your coat, respecting her, making her laugh... all those things, but if you don't pay for the date, it's over. All that means nothing if you don't pay.
      That's one thing that keeps me from dating. And I know not every woman is like that, but there's high chances of finding one like that, and it gets exhausting to keep dating girls like that.

    • orphan

      yknow if you don't want to pay for the first date in its entirety then don't. just understand there's many other guys that will. she's merely pointing out that because you'd rather not pay for all of the first date (regardless if you're cheap or operating out of "principle", then she'll lose interest.

      justifying it with the logic of fairness doesn't make upnfor the fact you would rather not shell out the money... it doesn't matter why... the point is you won't. a good handful of women and men, find genuine generousity attractive.

      either ask for a raise or accept that you're cutting your options in half over a lame ass principle.

    • Show All
  • Luci92
    Your points are valid, however I really disagree with your first point about 'investment' or the man insisting on paying, like, who cares? Just split the goddamn bill or pay for what you ate and be done with it.
    • yucel_eden


      At least one girl disagrees with that. Was starting to get worried lol

    • Luci92

      @yucel_eden Haha yeah I don't understand why girls insist the man pay... it's just ridiculous tbh

    • yucel_eden

      Not that I'm for splitting. I don't let girls pay in the first date, it's just how I am.

      But to suggest girls get turned off if we don't isn't the right way forward. I mean if your future with a person is down to Β£20 then why bother.

      My first ever date, I got to the cinema after her as I was working before, so she bought everything before I even got there. I told her off but, she didn't care

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  • ManOnFire
    This really gets me about these kinds of Takes females write: "this is just my experience and it's not meant to offend anyone," or "I'm not saying ALL guys are like this." It contradicts itself! And you're always going to lose guys' respect right off the bat. No guy is gonna take you seriously by slandering them in the title, and trying to follow it up with a disclaimer in the beginning. That makes me not care right away.
    • Right. She immediately comes across as a feminazi.

    • Hfelecity

      Interesting, because honesty these are pretty much the most common reasons why I choose not to continue seeing a man, aside from simply not being attracted to him.

    • @Hfelecity #4 I can understand. #1- It's like yeah I'd offer to pay but not because you are a woman. Because I had a good time and out of generosity. But when a woman makes a huge deal about going Dutch it's sketchy. She appears like a cheapskate and it's as though she believes she is owed something for spending time with someone or simply because of her gender. If you don't want to spend time with someone, don't. Money is meant to be spent and have a good time. Worse comes to worse it's ok to see eachother as equal individuals on a date. What's most important is if you had a good time, not whether or not you have a certain number of more bucks in your pocket. #2 I can see baby as being weird. Honey or sweetie- just tell them my name is this or I'd like to be called this actually. Don't drive yourself crazy over small things. #3- Happens to me all the time regardless of gender. I just see it as no one owes me a long text. How they text is their choice.

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  • ParamountArmada
    more like Women, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You. your soo conceited, and most of these reasons is why guys dont keep the girl, guys want to be themselves with a girl, not be controlled and expected to be someone they are not.
    • Anonymous

      Hmm conceited? I dont know about you, but i've been in a very happy relationship for the past 7 years with the man that I love- and we are very happy and engaged. He doesn't mind doing these things, difference between a man and a boy. A boy complains, a man takes pride in taking care of his woman and treating her right.

    • 7 years and you didn't get married sooner, you dont seem happy to me. perhaps the pride is the problem because conceited and pride are traits of arrogance.
      so what about the woman? do you treat him right and take care of him? or do you just sit around expect him to do everything and use him and call it love, like a lot of stuck-up snob women do because they think guys are for personal gain.

    • cut the shit, "men this is why we don't want to date you" coming from a girl that's about to get married, and been dating the same guy for 7 years? my guess is you're not happy, and you're cheating on him.

  • Fearless_banana
    Just wanted to say I do all of those things and women still want to date me.

    I don't pay for her meal. That would suggest that she's doing me a favor. Women are more than capable of working and paying their own meal.

    Truth in reality women don't really want guys tip toeing around these rules of yours. That will actually turn pussies dry.
    • Didn't you say in another question you had a 2.3 inch penis?

    • @BubbleBoy69 2.3 and a half boyo. Get your shit straight. I'm huge.

    • blondfrog

      you make up for it with your body that's why.

  • JudgmentDay
    Won't really matter to me anymore as I've stopped asking anyone out a very very long time ago, as I've already given up on "dating" and I just DO NOT believe in love after realizing the "TRUTH" for what the underlying cause for "love" and "physical attraction" to be. What causes those desires? Just hormones and chemicals in our brains and bodies. And then eventually it all wears off.

    So then, why did it even mattered at all in the first place?

    Deep down I think we're all really alone and lonely on the inside despite being with somebody else or surrounded by other people because it's just that, they ARE NOT OURSELVES and they can NEVER BE US.

    If dating, sex, and/or relationships ever really mattered at all, it's only because many of us would choose to keep this cycle with the possibilities of suffering and pain to keep going that allow and permit the possibility of a painless extinction. Yea, it's the whole survival instincts and selfish kind of thing, it's entirely part of our DNA, can't really get rid of it. You bring someone into existence ONLY because YOU WANTED TO bring them into existence, and because you COULD bring them into existence in the first place. But the truth is there are many MANY Unhappy people in this world, and not all of them may actually even be aware of it.

    From my very own perception, Dating and Relationships only even mattered if somebody actually want their own family with children or something as that is more often than not, the end goal, the real goal, other than the usual whole "getting laid" or "score" thing.

    But I realize having a family with offspring just is not something I will ever agree with as I look into things even further and deeper, existentially deeper. If you aren't able to, then you're lucky and you shouldn't because it's very very bleak and melancholic. Even if I were to try and hide this and try to "date" somebody, I can't hide these deep dark and unhappy feelings and thoughts "forever" and it wouldn't even make sense for me to even try anymore.

    For me, there are absolutely No turning back, it just can't be changed in any possible way. As there is only really just one way everyone is headed after coming into existence, to make the decisions of either choosing to prolong this entire cycle with the same inevitable end, or just let it be the end just for themselves and face it on their own by themselves absolutely without involving anyone else. As the very end it just that, the inevitable emptiness.
  • hellionthesage
    Reason why men don't want to date women: Entitled and self serving. So him wanting sex is him acting entitled to your body but you wanting his money is perfectly reasonable because "vagina"? Yeah hypocrisy abounds.
    • Yep. That sets a tone for the relationship too. A tone of selfishness on her part.

    • @AynonOMouse Yep. The funny part is I'm not against paying for the first date I think the traditional way of doing things is their for a reason however when its not reciprocated (as she is suggesting) and is completely one sided where the guy is bending over backwards to please her and she is doing nothing in return that's when I have issues. He pays she pays both pay that's fine but if its not even and fair in distribution of resources (whether that be money or other things) then that's when I have an issue. Its the blatent hypocrisy of it that irritates me to no end.

  • Tdieseler
    1) I used to pay for dates, not any more. Females are too frickin fickle and i end up wasting my time, and hard earned money. Its fine for one girl, but its multiple for some guys, that shit adds up.
    2) That one doesn't even apply to me. My terms of endearment are usually ruder.
    3) In my experience, its usually the girls that do that one word bullshit, and you should be happy when a guy takes time to respond... means he's got a life and is not hanging on to the phone for your messages. And know you women, if he was hanging on to the phone just waiting for you to contact, you would eventually call him clingy or even better, a stalker.
    4) Well, its our fucking nature... you women are too pushy for commitment but are unwilling to pay the price which is sex so... you want commitment, well, be ready to pay the price... im yet to meet a man who has cheated on a woman that gives him what he wants... aka sex. Other women only look interesting when the main girl is lacking...(and you my friend, yes you Asker, Seem to be lacking a lot)
    5) Too clingy, not clingy enough... perfect example of why i say women should shut the hell up in relationships... y'all don't even know what you want and want guys, who are clueless by the way, to figure all this shit out... if a guy is not clingy, its bad, if he's too clingy its STILL bad. If he's not confident, its bad, if he's TOO confident its bad...
    Women say men don't understand them, its because women don't even understand themselves. And women claim to understand men, y'all don't even have a fucking clue... understand yourselves first before you encroach on our section.
    Im gonna call in my niggas @Fearless_banana @anonman32 @DooMguy @OlderAndWiser (theres more but...) for their input on my opinion. Guys that actually have a clue.
    • DooMguy

      + 1

      generally this is something I'd just ignore

      seriously number 4, what happens when you aren't pushy for sex? The friendzone, happens every time.

      "Females are too frickin fickle" "perfect example of why i say women should shut the hell up in relationships..."

      these two quotes pretty much hit the nail on the head. There will be situations where a woman will ask you to do something then complain about the way you do it. In other words even if you do the right thing you're still wrong

      They way I see it, even if the take writer found the perfect guy who did all of this he might accidentally leave the toilet seat up one day and that undoes everything

      0/10 take, it's good that you disagree

    • Tdieseler

      @DooMguy lol... dawg... them pics tho...
      I should sooooo include you in the take that im writing... it mentions this. its gonna be bad dude, im going for max down votes.

    • I agree. My opinion, she has set these dumb standards and thinks a guy has to fall perfectly into them. Truth is if a guy follows these standards to the tee it will actually turn her off. Women don't want a man tip toeing around trying to impress her.

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  • Smmyskittles
    I really hope this is a joke.

    1. The first date does not matter who pays. I COULD NOT care less. Said several times before, I'll pay. So long as it gets paid.

    What if it doesn't work out? How many girls after you is he going to date or try to? How much will that add up to for him? Split the bill if it matters to you so much. Damn.

    2. Have you TOLD him your last name? Have YOU even asked his? Mhm. Interesting.

    3. "You Take Forever to Respond to Calls/ Messages or Respond With 1 Word Answers!" - Do you have a life? Define "forever".

    There are some users that I take 2+ days to respond to just because I don't have the time. Great example. I JUST got to PMS from Wed/Thursday. Extremely busy and didn't have the time. - - - Maybe you're too clingy?

    4. Sometimes. lmao. Yet, women can be the same way.

    5. Ghosting is different than "not clingy enough". I'd rather a man who makes time for me and shows me he cares to do it. Not someone who's constantly trying to get my attention. Although, once in a while <3 it's nice to be spoiled like that.

    @akadatank44 - You've blown up my kik like that before. I really liked coming back to that many messages.

    So, umm, how do you define the "perfect" amount of clingy.

  • Bizzaro_Elmo
    What narcissistic, cheap, pushy, uptight, frigid femi-nazi decided asking this question, while on her flow, was a good idea?
    "Pay on the first date?" No, you ape with long hair. WHY in the hell would I "invest" in a date if I don't know there will be a second one? Why would I even consider spending money when all YOU EQUATE to up to that point is "someone I talk to a little more than anyone else"? "Pay for the first date." [scoffing... loudly] I'll PAY for a date when YOU wake US up because its time to go to the diner for breakfast. HOW about that?
    TEXTING is a woman's... thing. Men will text, IF we have time. Either we don't have time OR we don't feel like waiting on you to finish 3 other conversations you have going OR we are waiting on you to mention or flirt with with a sex question. Anything else, if it's not news, then it's inane.
    Too pushy for sex: Really? Hmmm, I wonder if it's because you screwed around so long TEXTING us with suggestive flirts and waiting on the "perfect" time to have sex, that all we are interested in by the time you "Come over and Chill" is that we keep our Blue Balls from literally taking away our ability to walk. I wonder who's fault that is? (BTW: What mongoloid doesn't know "Netflix & Chill" is date-talk for "We've waited long enough, lets have wild monkey sex on the coffee table.")
    Too clingy? This from "Why won't you talk to me?" "You should be more expressive with your feelings." "Why are you so quiet today?" "That's all? Your mother is doing 'fine?' After having her hip replaced? She's just doing 'fine?'" "What do you think of this dress?" "I know you said you were going out with your friends, but you could've called me to let me know you were okay!" Then if we stay up under you, NOW THAT's a problem? ... typical...
  • NJ_Casanova
    From your comments I can see why you'd only post as ANONYMOUS ;-P

    1. comment just tells how much a Prostitute women are. "You got to pay to play".

    2. Is meet to be endearing/sweet... and in the first date or 2 most girls do n't give their last name.

    3. If you ask a Yes/No question... then you should expect a 1 word answer. Having a conversations using txting is Dumb and so is talking on the phone for hours (unless you live far apart). men don't like to do it. We'd rather have the conversation face to face.

    4. Most men are horny. Hell if he's spending $100+ on the date... Most men would expect something... maybe you should go DUTCH if you want to "just be friends". Sex is the only reason that a guy would put up with a girl's BS... if he WASN'T 100% "In Love" with her.

    5. True... most guys should limit texts to 2-3 MAX in general.. if she didn't reply. I do think after the first date a "had a goodnight, text me when you get home safe, or I'd like to see you again" text should be the only " 1 " text a guy should send after a first date. Girls can't have it both ways... Either you'll get a guy that is REALLY interested in you and contacts you often... or you'll get the guy that only wants sex and isn't interested that takes a long time/doesn't text often. You have to choose the guy you want (marrying type or a hook up).
  • FakeName123
    "If you can't invest on the first date, then don't bother investing in the relationship. The first meeting sets the tone, and unless the girl insists on splitting the tab... you should insist on paying."

    And how would that not count for the other side as well?
  • EnigmaStigma
    It's funny how you mention guys paying for the first date and all the guys get all pissed and start throwing out "feminazi" lololol. Feminism is the exact opposite. Feminists don't want guys to pay for shit, they want everything "equal."
    This take is about chivalry and manners, plain and simple, it has zero to do with feminism.
    Go back to your caves trolls.
    • Kitsunen19

      Feminists want equality for both genders
      which can and will never happen because the game is always at your advantage... more job opportunities easier life based on looks
      weaker bodies meaning less meinual jobs and more mind work.

      Without my biase though
      Though feminists want equality for both genders
      feminazis want it better for women

      That is the difference they're calling her a feminazi because she says the guy should have to pay unless she wants to.

      Again you have more opportunity easier jobs and I've never seen ANYONE doing the same job getting paid less

      I've seen MEN in the service industry get LESS HOURS but never paid more.

    • bobbyxx

      Go back to your cage troll and stop sponging off men.

    • That is inaccurate to an extreme. If feminism was for equality they wouldn't be fighting for more rights for women while downplaying or ignoring the loss of rights of men, many of which where at the hands of feminist.

  • vonasaurus
    i agree with all but one of these~ the guy should not be stuck with the tab just because he's a guy.

    in my opinion, the person who does the asking should at least offer to pay; still, both parties should come prepared to pay for themselves. that way, if it goes bad, no one person is "indebted" to the other (since it's pretty sad that, even in 2016, some people still think paying for the date=you owe them sex).
  • Bugiman
    So silly
    Point 1) That is just sexist, expecting someone to pay entirely on his gender... Did we go back in time?
    Point 2) I can get the nicknames sound stupid, and I personally wouldn't do it. but you would brush off a guy who might be nice in all other ways simply because he called you nickname too early? Seems like something you could easily solve if you're an adult. Not something to break a future relationship over
    3) Some people simply aren't attached to their phones. i personally think it's way to clingy for someone to expect me to always reply in short notice and always have elaborate messages ready. I don't like long calls/long texts/stories. But I can't see why this would make me a non-dateable guy. It's only at the start of a relationship that you want to hear each other all the time. Afer a while you also need your own space (at least in my relationship)
    4) Am I? Again very sexist. you're male so you push too much for sex... so cliché
    5) This last definitely shows the whole fault of your entire post.
    You say it yourself, some people are verly clingy others not. This is so with both males and females. And this goes for most your points. These are very personal preferences you have that you broadcast as general truth.

    This take should be named "What I don't like in guys at this moment in my life"
    What you search in a man will probably change over the years aswell
  • Mustachekitteh
    First one isn't it.

    I do hate the Calls/ Messages one.

    Pushy for sex isn't that often and most dudes don't do that

    I've seen dudes that are clingy and I've seen ones that barely are

  • MCheetah
    I'm gonna try not to curse in thiis...

    1. No. I'm not your sugar daddy and we're both grown adults. Unless you're unemployed or my paid escort, you pay for your own sh*t. What I look like, an ATM? You can't complain about women not having equality, and then do sh*t like this. And you can't expect men to pay for your sh*t like some kind of sugar daddy and not give it up afterwards, unless you're just looking to take advantage of him. You can't say "my time is valuable" and then imply his time AND money isn't. Get f*cked.

    Western women, this is why modern men don't want to put up with your sh*t anymore.

    2. Does it f*cking matter? Like, is the future love of your life really dependent on him asking you what your last name was? Did you ever TELL him your f*cking last name? I imagine so many women wouldn't even give that out on the first few dates, just to be safe.

    3. If a man says/does too much, he's picky/annoying. If he does too little, you pull sh*t like this. What is the right f*cking response then? You're not even mad he's ghosting you or acting indifferent, but that he's not saying enough for your entitled bitch ass. What if you asked him a simple question, like "are you free this weekend?" and he's busy at work, and all he can say is "Yes."

    4. If you don't know by now that most men want sex, then you should just become a lesbian. And it's not like they're raping you or anything; you can always politely tell him no. I mean, your entitled ass wants free food after all. You're not willing to go Dutch or anything. So why are you acting like this is such a big deal? And to point it out, YOU are the one choosing these men. Maybe YOU should stop choosing horndogs, and go after men willing to wait. I see no accountability from you, or for women in general, anywhere in this.

    5. Again, what the F*CK do you want?
  • Xseed
    If guys should pay on the first date really depends on the guy and how competent he is. If he takes you to a fancy restaurant but has 20 bucks in his pocket, then that's just dumb. First dates should be casual and easy AND creative. Especially if the guy likes you a lot. I am talking coffee, ice cream and a walk, more walks. Pretty much just walks. If he has 20 bucks in his wallet then he should be able to pay for the first date. That's how easy the first date should be.

    The pet names really depends on the girls. But if it's a problem to you then kindly tell the guy you don't like him calling you those names so early on. It's called communication. Talk about it. This goes hand in hand with men and women who Bitch to everyone around them about their significant others problems but doesn't talk to the significant other themselves and expect the problem to go away. Serious? Come on.

    The pushing for sex again depends on the guy AND the girl. I was with a girl for a year and we had sex on the first date. Same time I dated another girl for a year and we had sex a month after our first date. WHEN to have sex is not the issue. The WHY is important. If you're both into each other and both already know that you want to date each other, then have sex whenever. People have this fear that early sex means no commitment. Wrong. Guys and girls who just want sex and no commitment, means no commitment. If you make a guy, who doesn't want a commitment, wait months before having sex, do you think he'll magically change his mind? Again this comes down to communicating what it is that both people want. I know, talking about this stuff is awkward. But so is when he/she fuqs you and doesn't contact you after.

    This last one is stupid. "Too clingy or not clingy enough"? Serious? No wonder men nowadays are so confused about dating and women, when girls throw around statements like that. The term "clingy" is so wrong and misinterpreted today. If a guy calls and texts you regularly then he's interested in you. Iam sure most women have done this as well. Very rarely do you see guys completely destroying a girls inbox with texts, those are overly aggressive guys. Clingyness is if he's relying on the girl for his happiness and satisfaction in life and not himself. Women have blown the term out of proportion. If she doesn't like the guy from the get go, then anything he does she will judge harshly on. Ever heard the term, "an attractive person can do no wrong"?
    • lizee

      Apart from the paying thing (I'd be happy to go on a picnic), I think most of the above goes both ways. Most of the above can relate to guys as well as girls.

  • Fathoms77
    Oh good. I don't really have a problem with any of those. ;)
    • Vivaldi

      I have a problem with all of them.

  • BuchitaBuchys
    1. Don't agree. We can go Dutch but I don't mind paying at all. This seems like female entitlement to me. Why does he need to pay? I'm not saying you to pay solely (go Dutch).

    2. Eh. I'm bothered if he's calling me like "my love/wife/etc" (calm down Ted Mosby lol). I was never one to throw a fit if someone called me sweetie or something like that. Not offensive to me.

    3. I agree with that. I don't like it when they seem uninterested through text.

    4. I agree. I don't like it when they act as if it's all about sex or even mostly. Please get to know me first or no sex. It's this entitlement I can't stand.

    5. I agree. Again, no Ted Mosby "I think I love you" type of stuff lol. But also don't be so nonchalant about us as if you don't even care if I exist (see no 3).
  • Hasaboyfriend
    Ummm those are superficial reasons
    REAL reasons girls might not want a second date are:
    1. You are not confident enough or you're narcissistic.
    2. You may not be their type, she may like funny guys but you're all about sports. One girl may like quiet and gentlemanly guys, but you're too loud and obnoxious. One girl may want a guy who is loud and takes charge but you're too quiet and timid.
    3. She may have found a better date, if she's actively dating she may have two or three dates set up within the same month.
    4. You guys just didn't click, you may have been a good guy and eligible for dating other women, but she didn't feel anything between you.
    5. She's was offended or disappointed by something you did. Maybe you didn't pay for the first date (which you shouldn't have to do, but some women want that) or maybe she is a gold digger and found out that you didn't have money, but those women aren't your time.
  • MG-TOW
    Sounds like someone who wants to be treated as a princess just because she has a vagina.
    Please give us one good reason why we should pay on the first date?
    • Mrwoo99

      Because women are whores... obviously. If a woman makes you exchange money, work, effort and hard time then it's a prostitute. If men only realised women used a different currency then men would be much liberated to just pay hard cash for an escort.

    • MG-TOW

      @Mrwoo99 Don't ever call women whores!! That is just uneducated stuff that bitter guys say.

    • Mrwoo99

      Oh sorry, I meant to say a sexually libertated woman who uses her body, to manipulate, exchange value and get what she demands in terms of fucking her way to top.

      Tell me what else can a women be besides that...

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  • Mrwoo99
    I'll pay on the first date as long we both sign an agreement/contract declaring I am guranteed sex at my place after supper. 😆

    Other than that it's a bad investment of my money because if I'm not making progress with any of the women I am dating then dating numerous women is going to cost a hell of a fortune, especially if I don't get anything back on my behalf. Trust me guys it adds up over time! ... think of it like tax.
  • Unit1
    "Men, This is Why We Don't Want to Date You"
    And then
    "This article is purely based on my personal experience/opinion and those of close female friends of mine."

    Nope! I'm out.

    Just kidding but right there is your very first mistake: Contradictions.
  • Nothanks700
    I'll pay on the first date, but if the girl doesn't offer to split, it will probably be he last day. Because you are right, it does set the tone. If you are going to lay there and do nothing it pretty much speaks to the rest of the relationship, including the bedroom
  • BlueCoyote
    If you EXPECT me to pay for you on the first date, I'll laugh, spit on your feet and walk out the door. I don't care if you look like 18-year old Pamela Anderson - if you expect me to pay, you must have an extraordinarily shitty personality.
    If you want to be treated like an emancipated woman, act like one. You've got a job, you've got money, pay your own shit.
    • And we as women are happy for you to laugh and spit. Byeeeeee...

    • BlueCoyote

      @Bubbles123X That's okay, there are also decent women out there. In fact, I've already found one. So yes, goodbye.

  • Stacyzee
    I've been through all of this and I've got to say I totally free u!
    • Stacyzee

      *feel u

    • Gold digger detected :D

    • Stacyzee

      Which is why I struggled in a relationship where the guy literally had a minimum wage job and was homeless? Sorry , but love doesn't put food on the table for the family or give a future to your kids.
      It's not about being a gold digger it's called being sensible and not taking someone that has no future.

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  • tyber1
    No, If YOU can't invest your own damn half on the first date, then don't bother investing in the relationship. You aren't worth more than the guy you go out with.
  • SleepingSnorlax
    Do you realize how terrible you sound when you say that men should pay?
    By that logic you should always have sex when we push for it unless we insist on waiting for it
    Women only want equal rights when it benefits them *sigh*
  • brain5000
    Every now and then I read something that reminds me of why it has been over a year since my last date. Hopefully someone will post something just as repulsive next year to keep me on track. Thanks!
    • 10dsw

      Hahahahaha awesome post!

    • Nothing repulsive about this list. Everything she listed is actually pretty accurate expect for number one. Don't see why the rest is so difficult to do. Lmao.

    • @99percentangel the first one is enough to invalidate the whole take, despite the others being valid points.

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  • 99percentangel
    Everything on this list is pretty accurate except number one for me. Number one is petty af.
    • NatashaJ

      True 1 makes your ass get dump in the middle nowhere and you have to walk home by yourself.

  • anonman32
    why should i invest anything if the other party is not investing anything? seems like lousy investment to me.
    • Yeah, because a $7 for two cups of coffee is such an investment.

    • AdamThomas

      @cheeseysouffle That's not the point. She talks about the man investing in the date, what is she investing in return? And if it's only a small investment like $7, why such a big deal about investing anyway?

    • @AdamThomas her investment comes in later down the line.

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  • Thisperson98
    I will never pay for the first date. Why should I pay? is it because your time is more valuable than mine?
  • Words_and_Wisdom
    "You Won't Pay For The Girl On The First Date!"
    You telling me that I should pay for you on the first date shows that you do not value my time. You think you're entitled to a free meal / coffee or whatever. No. Your time is not any more or less valuable than mine. You pay your fair share.

    "You Take Forever to Respond to Calls/ Messages or Respond With 1 Word Answers!"
    Tch... women put way less effort into messaging me from my experience.

    "You Are Too Pushy For Sex!"
    I'll never force you to do anything you're uncomfortable with. But if you think there's something inherently wrong with sex then that's something you need to work on. In the mean time I'm not going to wait around.

    "You Are Too Clingy/Not Clingy Enough!"
    Well don't play mind games. Don't intentionally try to 'test' us. If we message you too soon, we're clingy. If we don't message you right away, we're distant. Fuck off and make up your mind. You're not worth my time and effort if you can't admit that you're into me or not.
  • fuqthegovt
    The truth of the matter is we don't really want to date you either. We basically just want sex and dating is another hoop to jump through to get it. Why do you think sites like Eroticmonkey and Backpage are so popular and prostitution will never go away even after thousands of years of trying? It basically eliminates that hoop/obstacle.
    • @fuqthegovt There are a lot of guys who want more than just sex.

    • fuqthegovt

      @funny_strange_man they are probably just saying that out of fear of being cut off from the source of it. I know since I did exactly that in my 20's, lied my butt off and told them what they wanted to hear (eventually got tired of the resulting drama when the truth came out). Probably the majority do that.

    • @fuqtheqovt I am one of those guys who actually does want more than just sex

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  • Kahbakay
    Ohh god not this fucking shit again 😂 Get off the internet and go make some friends, you fucking feminazi
  • AndyOh
    I would suggest meeting men who were not so self absorbed and shallow, or too needy. Dating is a dicey game but if you keep finding guys that are like that , then maybe you are just attracting the shallow self absorbed jerks.
    Oh wait, this is kind of a satire.
    Still, be choosey. Looks aren't everything, though it helps.
  • Maxemeister
    Doesn't mean I'll change for this, I won't date anyone who thinks they're a gift from God and are entitled to things. I'll do what I feel is necessary in a relationship but won't abide by a rulebook

    Most of this stuff isn't a problem but all of them combined it seems pretty petty
  • RedVulcan
    Agree with all except number 1. I wouldn't want to have a first date where either partner pays, because I'm not particularly rich nor do I like investing in things right off the bat. For I first date I'd do something like a walk in the park or some other free event to get to know you better before actually spending anything.
  • AriadneSky
    well im a Woman who is attract to guys., so ill comment:-)

    i dont see why #1 is an issue. why should he pay you to go out if you want to go out. presumably you BOTH want to be there so your BOTH benefitting. he should pay if yore a prostitute... otherwise, why?

    i dont care about #2.

    i dont think phones and texting are helpful with dating. just creates extra drama. i rather just communicate when were face to face. so again do not care about #3.

    #4, well if im not ready ill say im not ready. if he accepts this he's not too pushy. i dont think trying is bad. not respecting boundaries that are COMMUNICATE is bad. some women like sex immediately also he really can't know without asking.

    #5. again without texting and phone calls this wouldn't even be an issue. and if a guy-or woman- disappears well i guess he's not interested. the is not not being clingy enough. this is not being intuits. an its good he let you know quickly. so you not waste time.
  • elegatoVI
    Omfg the one about texts! Same to you! And then you say too clingy, but not clingy enough? For fucks sakes! Every thing on this list can be reversed! I clicked on this take thinking it would help me, and came to see more shit that only makes me feel worse, it should be called "my opinion, this isn't meant to help anybody"
  • Kroak
    I have not really done any of those. And yet, poof, no dates. I am generally interested and invested in those that i do try to get dates from. However, I run into a mess of problems that always end in myself never passing that threshold. One major problem is that women in relationships tend to talk to me more. Another is that most of the ladies that are not in relationships don't want to be with a man like me, I am less of a talker and more of a thinker.
  • Cccgala
    You seem to detest compromises.

    Those are indeed happening in the real world but I think those wouldn't be problems if two lovers would resolve all of them maturely.

    Also, why use the pronoun "we" in your title when the readers would be seeing "me" and "my" on your second point later on?
  • smΓΈlf
    "You Won't Pay For The Girl On The First Date!"

    If we ask a girl, we pay, if she asks she pays, and if she don't dump her on the spot.

    "You Call Me "Baby, Honey, Sweetie" & You Don't Even Know My Last Name!"

    True be polite and respect one another at all time, once your are into one another a pet name may be suitable, not until then.

    "You Take Forever to Respond to Calls/ Messages or Respond With 1 Word Answers!"

    This is highly individual, some girls like quick responses for some a more slow is fine, however spamming is never good for either gender.
    Send one message and wait, if you need a answer send a polite reminder the next day at the earliest, if he/she do not responds, dump him/her or expect an apology when they respond - they owe you a suite response time, and a fair priority regardless of how busy they are. If they can't manages that, then they are not ready for or worthy of YOU.

    "You Are Too Pushy For Sex!"

    It's ok to try, but respect a refusal and decide if you still want to persuite this relationship or not.

    "You Are Too Clingy/Not Clingy Enough!"

    Again highly individual, and it's more about compatibility than gender.
  • MasterofYou
    Just another girl that hates men... Just go away...
    • @love2run13 classic projection. this is totally an "it's all about me" article.
      guys mostly just want mutuality... girls like you make it all a mess lol

    • love2run13

      uh no lol. its called guys should be gentlemen. the best guys I've gone on a date with are the ones who are protective, nice, have lots to talk about, and offer to pay the first date-nine times outta ten i insist on splitting it but its not about the money-just like a gift, its the thought behind the words. in a relationship, i want a guy who would do anything for me just as i would for him. too many times have i gotten used by a man who ends up not giving a shit, a guy who just walks away after he knows what he did wrong and why im upset... if you really care about me, you better be leaving your friends for the night to stay with me and see why im upset and comfort me. cuz id do the same. if not, wtf are we, why are you here?

    • @love2run13 You are not worth the time of day... no guy would be nice enough for you...

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  • tbm1986
    I only object to paying for the first date in full if she took the biscuit with what she ordered. I've only been pushy for sex if it's been a while and it's going nowhere. Sex helps people bond when in the early stages of a relationship, which girls often miss. I don't fall into the other three traps you've identified.
  • ayylamo
    >"You Take Forever to Respond to Calls/ Messages or Respond With 1 Word Answers!"
    That's because girls get flooded with so many messages that they ignore the content and only pay attention if the guy is hot. The slime balls you date know this and won't invest a lot of time messaging because of it. Quantity gets more results than quality in this scenario.
  • blondfrog
    Not all girls think like you not all girls care if the guy pays on the first date. Don't speak on every gal's behalf. Plus I find it funny how you won't want to date a guy for being too clingy yet most women are clingy themselves talk about the black pot calling the kettle black.
  • TruExo
    • TruExo

      all these guys that down voted me. you're mad because I'm the guy your girl leaves you for, I would downvote too 8)