Not yet another take demonizing women but like women are at fault for this and so are men...
I was getting drinks with a couple. it was the girl's birthday and she called her boyfriend and idiot for not realizing something simple like forgetting where he parked the car or something. and i thought to myself, if he called her an idiot for the same thing the whole table would shift their collective heads in judgmental staresa at him. why the double standard?
I think it starts at the home, the American home, since that's my culture. For some reason, it's become the thing to treat the father like a twidling oaf who couldn't make it very long without his wife who's obviously the brains behind the family structure. Doesn't matter if he's a doctor and she's a housewife, she is the smart one and most rational when it comes to family stuff. If he gets a little pudgy around the midsection she can tease him about it and the kids follow suit but run for your life if he calls her a little pudgy around the midsection.
This is repeated in popular television, social media etc. The idea of the American dad as some kind of joke of a man. As this guy who begs for sex and who's life is made when his wife finally decides to give him his once a week happy time. who even though he works all day, doesn't get a moments peace at home and shouldn't expect it. Who's expected to understand when his wife chooses to go to an office party instead of their dinner date but again god help him if he decides to go to an office retreat instead of that paris trip he talked about in passing. It's also for some reason fine if he spoils his daughter and outright prefers her company but he's a devil if he feels more connected with his son and spoils him and gives him a lot of attention as his pride and joy.
This has had a cumulative effect to where the American father is not what he should be. Daughters learn its ok to make fun of daddy and develop really bratty behavior (a huge reason for guys dumping girls that guys never cop to is because they act like brats) Sons don't respect their fathers or think they're that all that awesome and in some cases are even told by their mothers to be "nothing like your father" when they grow up and follow suit. By the time they realize your dad was struggling form a culture that was repressing and pushing him down its too late he's become that dad.
Here's the thing, it's not a bad thing for women to be able to tease their husbands and in fact a wife who's too submissive is a bad example for her daughter who has a right to have opinions and make jokes around the guys she will date and marry. But only to the extent that she is willing to take it given right back to her. a woman should never put her hands on a guy in a violent way (unless he likes that kind of thing) a woman should never outright insult a guy and not expect whatever her reaction to being insulted would be. it's not about being tough enough its about the fact that the joke in question was intended as a put down and not a laugh (i agree men should be able to take a joke) in other words women, it's not ok for you to take out your anger through barrage of insults and put downs because if nothing else your own safety. you don't know what a guy is capable of and you don't want to keep poking until you find out (well some of you do but you shouldn't)
find a man that is connected with his father who's learned the spirit of the male experience and is at peace with it. Show your father more respect and admiration than maybe he even has earned and do so because he's your father. it will make things a lot more harmonious